Notes: I have a terrible cold, it is 5am, I am miserable, so Heero better damn well suffer too.
Just kidding. This is an experimentation with point of view. And keep this in mind- the last sentence is hopeful and confirming. It's not just "He is going to do the above action." It's "He exists and now he is ok with that and doesn't need statistics to help him do so as much." Although it is really both. You'll see what I mean in a minute. Hope you enjoy! I'm a sucker for open-ended but hopeful endings.Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Shoulders hunched.
Jacket unbuttoned.
Eyes narrowed.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Step.
Gray.
Step.
Gray.
Step.
This is what I am.
This is what I have been without her.
Gray sky.
Every day.
One more step.
Don?t know where.
I count everything now.
I count everything now because I know she does not count anything.
She has words now.
She has words now because she does not need my numbers.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Relena.
Pattern.
Number.
Love.
Pattern.
Number.
Love.
I want all three.
?Two outta three ain?t bad,? says Duo.
I don?t want Duo.
I don?t want gray.
I don?t want steps.
I want to question, I want to think, I want to feel, I want to think of her and when I think of her I don?t want it to hurt and it doesn?t hurt but the unfamiliar is and now so I know and I WANT TO WANT-
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gray.
Gra- Relena?
.
I smile a bit brighter than usual. I know the rain is cold, and I will be drenched with it momentarily, but I still can?t stop myself smiling at the announcement. More funding makes more means, and more means make more improvements, and more improvements make peace.
I put on my jacket, glad that its softness is familiar, and glance around surreptitiously. I then dart out the door, before I can?t bear to turn down anyone?s offer of an umbrella.
Ah! Splash after splash! I love it! I love this planet. I love this rain. I love spinning around on this planet, laughing, letting the rain hit my face. It sounds crazy, and I?d be teased mercilessly by Dorothy if she heard this theory, but my theory is that everyone on this planet and in space should work as hard as they can to protect the Earth?s natural right to make us miserably wet.
I almost start laughing out loud, and then I stop myself. I stop twirling, I stop smiling happily, I start smirking at myself for acting so childish again. Really, it?s the rain. It drives me crazy and I love it. I don?t think I could ever live on a colony for an extended period of time, because I revel in the unpredictability of being able to be poured upon at any time when I?m on Earth. Besides, if I were on a colony, then maybe I would see him again, and then we would?
I shake the water out of my hair, smile truly again at the thought of the rain, and keep going down the street. Many people turn to see my face a second time after they pass, but I am gone by then.
My eyes move restlessly from store window to store window, trying to keep up with my fast pace and trying to burn the images of paperwork out of my mind. Someday the Foreign Minister will realize I?m doing twice the work he is, and I enjoy it. It?s hard, but I enjoy it nonetheless. I like to think that even though I have chosen my own path in life now, there are still people out there who also enjoy the benefits of my work, and people who are m- HEERO?!
.
She is frozen in an awkward position, half surprise and half happiness. He is frozen, but in a different way; a way that makes him count the raindrops that hit her face as he also counts the seconds that they do not speak to each other.
?What are you- Heero, I?m so- how- why are you here? It?s-? She catches herself at the end, shaking her head. ?Of course, Preventer. Is something that wrong? Is there a threat?? The apprehension at going back into the office building is spilled across her face, and his shoulders unstiffen slightly at the familiarity back in her voice.
?No.? He steps closer to her.
?Then what is it? Are you here on vacation?? She angles toward him, eyes widening innocently.
?No.? He steps to the side of her, looking up at the sky, which is still gray.
He looks at her face, then. It is not gray.
She frowns, a crinkle forming at the uneven end of her mouth, and she puts her arm out to steady him, or to steady her, or to steady the both of them. She realizes she is being a child again, withdraws her arm, and asks a final question before mentally getting ready to go down the blurred avenue once more and not feel any overwhelming sense of emptiness while doing so...
?Are you going to be staying long??
?Yes.?
He is.