Too Drunk to Think

[Kanya Barton]

Too Drunk to Think
By Kanya Barton

Disclaimer: The Trigun characters portrayed in this story do not belong to me. They are simply my muses in my sorry attempt at writing. I am gaining NOTHING from this writing...except maybe a reputation as a really bad writer...anyways please continue with the story.

?Mr. Vash, I?m really sorry about what happened between you and Meryl,? Monica?s voice drifted out of nowhere.
?Ah, it?s not that bad,? I replied, too drunk to really think about what I was saying. ?She said that her domineering spirit can?t handle the simplicity of mine, so she went for my brother and surprisingly he took her. I guess if that?ll keep him from trying to destroy the human race, I?m okay with it.?
I took another long drink from my mug of whatever alcoholic beverage the bartender had chosen to give me. I had made a promise to myself that I would stop drinking once I got my brother back...so much for that.
?No, it?s not okay. You treat her with so much respect, and this is all that she gives you in return? You deserve better than that after all that you?ve been through. You killed for her. You almost died for her. You would think that she would show a little gratitude.?
?And do what? I can?t ask her to give up her happiness just because I have a twin brother who was determined to destroy everyone,? I yelled at her. There was a long, awkward silence. ?I?m sorry. I get loud and babble when I have a few drinks in me. I shouldn?t have yelled at you like that. You?re just trying to help me feel better.?
?It?s okay. So, what brings you to Inepril, anyways? I mean, shouldn?t you be keeping an eye on your brother to make sure he stays stable??
?Oh, believe me, he?s stuck with Meryl and Millie. There is no way that either of them would allow him to turn back. And, I came back here because I remember this place as where I had the most fun, without too many emotional attachments.?
?That?s kind of ironic. The town that was originally set out to kill you is where you had the most fun.? Monica laughed.
?That?s the reason why it was so fun! You all went from trying to kill me one second to celebrating me the next. You guys were the first ones to really discover my true identity and not be frightened by it.?
?You?re babbling again, Mr. Vash. We need to get you out of this saloon. Where are you staying??
?I think that I checked in at the inn earlier today, but everything is so hazy right now. I?m not too sure that I actually did.?
?Well, why don?t you stay at my place for the night? It?s only a few blocks down the road and it won?t be any hassle to me.?
?No, I would never let you take that kind of risk. When I get alcohol in me, my body really doesn?t like it. Before morning is here, you will find me vomiting all over every piece of furniture that you own.?
?Nonsense, I can?t just throw you out into the streets in your condition! Besides, I don?t have that much furniture anyways, so it wouldn?t be that bad. It would give me an excuse to buy some new stuff. Come on, I insist.?
?Okay, but I?m only going because I?m drunk and my reasoning skills are shot.?
?Good. Let?s go.?
I followed Monica out into the street. From the moment that I got out of my chair, I could feel the vomit coming. A few paces from the saloon, we had to stop so I could throw up whatever I had in my stomach at that time. Monica was there for me the entire time, rubbing my back.
?Tell me something Mr. Vash,? she started after I had finished my regurgitation, ?why do you drink so much when you know what it does to you??
I paused...I really wasn?t sure I knew the answer to that.
?Well, I guess at first it was a way for me to escape my pain over someone very close to me that was killed when I was very young. Now, I guess I?m just so used to drinking like that, I can?t drink any other way.?
?Are you drinking tonight because you and Meryl broke up??
?I don?t know. That could be part of the reason, but I wasn?t truly happy with Meryl, so I?m kind of relieved that we?re not together anymore.?
?Then why did you go back to drinking??
We had reached her humble home now and were standing on her porch. She was looking straight at me, so there was no way I could dodge answering the question.
?I guess, for the first time I have realized just how lonely I?ve been. I was with Meryl, but I was alone. I was with my brother, but I was alone. No matter how many people I surround myself with, I always feel...alone.?
Monica unlocked her door, ?Do you feel alone right now, Mr. Vash??
?Actually, Monica, I don?t. But, you don?t have to call me ?Mr.? anymore. Please, just call me Vash. I hate formalities between friends. And you?ve helped me so much in just the course of a few hours. How can I ever repay you??
?Oh please...the town is still in debt to you. This is the only way that I can really pay you back for all that you?ve done for me...I mean us...?
There it was again...another awkward silence. For some reason, she is the only person in the world right now that I could have a comfortable conversation with, but we still keep having these awkward silences.
She cleared her throat rather harshly, ?Well...Vash, I don?t have another bed to give you. All I have is the couch and my bed. So, since you?re the guest of honor, I?ll let you take the bed and I?ll take the couch.?
?No, Ma?am...I am not going to take the bed and throw you out on the couch. I?m fine with sleeping on the couch. Lord knows I?ve slept on worse.?
?But, the bedroom is closer to the bathroom, and, if you need to go and vomit, I?d like you to feel comfortable with getting to the bathroom on time.?
?I thought that you said you wouldn?t mind me vomiting all over your furniture.?
?Well, I would love to have an excuse to get new furniture, but right now I can?t afford it.?
?See? I knew I should have stayed at the hotel.?
?No! I wanted you to come with me...I shouldn?t have said that...?
In less than one second, I was totally sober, ?What? Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs. Robinson?? Monica looked at me with confusion. ?Sorry, I don?t know where that came from, but it seemed appropriate for the topic.?
There was another one of those awkward silences before Monica decided to break it.
?Look, Mr..,.I mean, Vash, I like you...a lot. Ever since you left Inepril, I?ve been following your every move to the best of my abilities. I didn?t want to come off as a stalker or try to force myself upon you in your current situation. That?s why I can?t let you sleep on the couch. And, that?s why I invited you to stay for the night. I never meant for anything else to happen. I just wanted to have a chance for you to know me better and for me to know you better.?
?Monica, do you like what you learned from me in my drunken state??
?Well, yes, I do. There is nothing that could sway my opinion of you right now, Vash.?
Suddenly, everything felt right in my head. Something clicked there in the last few minutes and I don?t feel the way that I did before. I can totally get used to this feeling.
?Look, Monica, it?s really late and I know that we?re both extremely tired.? I glanced into the bedroom. ?Tell you what, it seems like you have a rather spacious bed in there. So, why don?t we share it? That way I can be closer to the bathroom just in case I get sick, even though I am TOTALLY sober right now, and you won?t be kicked out of your own bed.?
?Are you sure that you want to do that??
?Monica, nothing could change my mind right now.?
She smiled and I smiled my first genuine smile since my days with Wolfwood. We climbed into her bed and I put my arm around her, pulling her close to me. The feeling of dread for the next day was gone. I had someone close to me now that totally understood me, and it meant everything to me. But, now, I was going to get the best night?s sleep ever.