Fall to Ashes - Chapter 3 by Coley Merrin

[miaka mouse]

blinks out of the darkness and tiptoes out*

Jen: *whispering* Anyone remember me?

*crickets chirp*

*music starts playing loudly*

She returns! Heh. Heh. *gulp* The story continues... and amazingly it begins to wind down... I can see the end! You can't but... that'll be remedied quickly. For those of you who don't remember this fic... it's been a darn long while since I've updated, the message #'s are 9126 and 9604 or the link to the first two chapters of the fic at ff.net is: http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=839090 A refresher since July, if you will.

A big thanks to Miaka for helping me along... what would I do without you? What would the fic *be* without you? O.o


Fall to Ashes

by Coley Merrin



Somewhere far beyond today
I will find a way to find you
And somewhere thru the lonely nights
I will leave a light in the dark
Let it lead you to my heart

--Somewhere Somehow - Michael W. Smith and Amy Grant


***
Hilde was indeed a sight for sore eyes. Her brief trip to L2 to sort out some of their business had seemed long to him...and his stomach. It was late the same evening that Heero had informed Duo of his plans to marry Relena, and he was bursting to share the news. Heero had seemed all too eager to get himself out of Duo’s presence. Afraid of more questions, Duo thought with a smirk. Had it been the first time Heero had been to the house on earth? It certainly seemed like it. Hilde and Duo had made the decision to relocate to earth for reasons pertaining to both of them. It allowed both of them to work at Preventer headquarters, Duo in a full time capacity, and Hilde consulting while she ran their small but profitable business with the help of staff located throughout the colonies. Duo helped, of course, but now only when Hilde was in need of his help.

Her timing couldn’t have been more perfect. A smile lit his face as he anticipated her reaction. No one said he couldn’t get a *little* pleasure out of it. She’d barely stepped out before he had grabbed her, picked her up and swung her around in a brief victory dance. She looked a little tired, a long shuttle trip could do that to a person, but she was Hilde, darn it, and she was back where she belonged. She was pretending to be angry with him for picking her up, being short made her a target she had complained, but she was laughing, a good sign, by the time he was done.

"What’s gotten into you?" Hilde asked after he’d set her back down. "You can’t be *that* happy to see me."

"Imagine the furthest thing in your mind that you ever expected to happen," he replied, anxious even before hello’s, "and then imagine out of the blue it *actually* happening."

She looked befuddled, getting the "never expect to happen" part, but not what could have happened to set him off like this. He outright laughed at her _expression when she heard the news. Heero and Relena were actually getting married.

"You *are* serious! I can’t believe it!" she said as they exited with her bags.

"I know, I could hardly believe it either when Heero told me... and I mean he actually came to our doorstep and *told* me like a human being. Or... like a Heero. Anyway, they want us to be the witnesses tomorrow afternoon."

"Does she have a dress? Wait... what am *I* wearing?"

Duo laughed and steered her attention away during the ride home to what else had been happening while she had been gone. He couldn’t have kept the smile from his face if he had wanted to. Their deep bond of friendship had kept them up even later into the night, discussing her trip, but neither quite brave enough to go beyond obvious reactions to say just how glad they were to be back together again.

***

The next morning had been whirlwind for them both. Hilde had torn apart the house looking for "the dress" as Duo hurriedly tinkered in their room devoted to mechanical and electrical things. They both liked to take things apart and see how they ticked... more than was healthy for their appliances. As Hilde's cry of triumph echoed, Duo had his own victory to crow about. They met each other in the hall, Hilde holding a dress, and Duo a mess of wires.

"What is *that*?" Hilde asked in suspicion.

"This..." Duo said with a grin, "is how we are going to record the wedding."

Hilde blinked.

"Heero will never agree to cameras, he’s too soldier-ish still. And 10 years from now, or even next week, we might need proof it occurred... not to mention to preserve memories for Relena, of course. Come on, Hilde!"

Hilde smirked. "It’s your neck on the line if Heero finds out."

Now hours later Duo resisted the urge to hop from foot to foot as he looked anxiously at Hilde.



"You got it on?"



"Everything's fine, Duo," she told him for at least the third time since they’d arrived only minutes ago. "Stop worrying."



"Can't help it," he replied, shifting again. "We're the only shot at getting this on film."



"Which is why we're both wearing a camera, just in case. As you said ‘They'll thank us later.'"



"You bet they will. Now, get in there with the bride, while I go see if I can calm the panicking groom."



With a laugh, Hilde turned and walked off towards where Relena was. Her heels clicked cheerfully on the classy black tiled floor. It wasn’t a large place they’d allotted for marriages here, but it was nice and colorful with paintings on the demure walls. It had his stamp of approval, although slightly tame for his tastes. His attention turned back to Hilde, the light from the outside window catching her just before she turned into the ladies preparation room.



"What great legs," Duo whispered.



"So why don't you tell her how you feel?"



With a yelp Duo spun to see Heero looking at him impassively. "You're one to talk, Heero middle name Hypocrite Yuy," Duo accused. "I have my woman, you have yours."



"Yeah, but I'm marrying mine."



"Like I said, you're one to talk."



The other man had a stubborn _expression on his face, Heero acknowledged. Likely it was something he had considered internally many times. It was just like Duo to get defensive... especially when he knew Heero was right. He turned away slightly, letting the corner of his eye keep track of Duo’s reaction as he spoke.

"Don't wait too long, Duo. You might wake up one day and find out that you're too late, and she's moved on to someone else. How will you live with yourself then?"



Duo kicked his heel back against the wall, and scowled at Heero.



"Take the precautions you are then? Marry her, just to make her mine?"



"No," Heero said, surprising them both. "Tell her how you feel. You're experienced in talking, it shouldn't be all that hard."



"Heero, you have changed in the past few years," Duo acknowledged as he walked past Heero before spinning back to him. "I know this because you don't grunt at me, but curb your mouth, my friend! You haven't told Relena you love her have you?"



"No."



"See then? And you shouldn't, not till you know for darn certain that you do. Then once you tell her...today is the happiest day in her life up till now. She's marrying the guy she loves. But the day you tell her you love her it's like everything changes!" His braid swung as he waved his hands, making his point. "Suddenly it's not enough that you've verbally acknowledged it once, but you have to do it when you wake up and when you leave and before you go to bed, and whenever else in between."



Heero blinked at the diatribe. "You've been reading marriage books?"



"Well..." he began.



Heero rolled his eyes internally. "Uh-huh."



"I wanted to know. And it's not like I'm afraid of the words!" Duo protested. "I'd tell Hilde any day...it's just..."



"That you're scared of the words. That she won't say it back."



"Yeah." Duo frowned. "You know...you're damn perceptive when you want to be! Wait...you are too?"



"Isn't everyone?"



"Yeah, I guess so. But we *know* with no doubt at all that you own Relena's heart. It's not a question. With Hilde...I can only hope."



"Hope, then. But don't wait too long," he admonished, turning away again.

Duo smiled, somewhat amazed by how much Heero had just said, and pleased beyond belief that Heero seemed to be opening up... just a bit. He lay a quiet hand on Heero’s shoulder, waiting to see if there was a reaction. There was none.

"Yeah, yeah I won't. You ready?"

"As I can be," Heero replied truthfully. He still kept down the little seed of doubt that threatened to grow.



"Make her happy, Heero. You both deserve that."



"So you've said."



"And I'm repeating it because I'm right," Duo said with a serious _expression on his face. "I'm often right."



"As often as you're silent." This brought laughter to the braided man's eyes.

"Perceptive and funny, too. I know you must be scared spitless, I sure would be. Just be yourself, and keep your twitchy trigger finger away from the gun I hope you don't (but know you probably do) have on you. She loves you, and...considering in a few hours you'll be in a position I doubt you've ever been in...take it as it goes. It's not rocket science, just listen to yourself and to her and you'll be set."



It appeared that Heero was taking Duo's words in. For all some saw him as a goof off, always joking and never serious, he was genuinely trying to help. And Heero acknowledged that with a nod. There were really no words he found to express the gratitude he felt. Scared spitless he wasn't, but there was an uneasiness in the pit of his stomach that he couldn't quite shake. Maybe in this crazy life they'd found, the two pilots could actually be called friends. Maybe one talked more, and maybe one didn't express himself much, but on a baser level they understood each other. Given the right circumstances and the opportunity, all five of them could have the opportunity to connect in a way that "friend" didn’t quite describe.

"So," Heero said, suddenly glad he didn’t have any trouble keeping a straight face. "Is that something else you’ve had to read up on?"

Duo stared, opened mouthed at him for a moment before throwing his hands up in the air and turning around.

"There’s just no talking to you," he said sounding miffed. "Try to give a guy some help, and all you get is insults."

Duo turned his head back to see Heero standing there with nothing more than a raised eyebrow at his antics. Shrugging as he smiled, he led the way to the room that would change Heero’s future.

"Ready, buddy?"

Heero nodded. "Yeah."

***

Relena was seated as calmly as possible in front of the mirror in the small bathroom. The chair someone had so thoughtfully provided was hard, but it didn’t register in her mind. When Hilde entered moments later Relena did little more than look up. Hilde stopped short, surveying the scene thoughtfully.

"You’re scared stiff aren’t you?" she asked in a bit of awe.

Relena found herself chuckling at the tone, as if it were somehow unacceptable that she, Relena Dorlian, might actually be scared. One could count her engagement in terms of hours without much thought, and the ring now held by Heero or now possibly Duo, still had an unfamiliar feel to it as she had taken it off, but now she felt slightly naked without it. Idly her fingers moved together, as if trying to compensate for the loss.

"I shouldn’t be, should I?" Relena asked, bemused. "In a bit, I’ll be marrying the man who has guarded my heart for years. Ah...what if I’m not enough for him?"

Hilde leveled a glare in her direction, odd looks fluttering over face before she struck a distinctly Duo-like pose.

"Look, Relena, you’re a beautiful woman, smart, and stubborn as all get out. Heero’s getting the better end of the bargain."

Relena saw right through her remembered speech, and laughed.

"Duo told you to tell me that, didn’t he?"

"Of course," said Hilde looking a bit miffed. "He doesn’t trust my capabilities. You love Heero, he cares for you deeply if not loves you, and you’re being given the opportunity to make a life together. Trust in him."

Relena smiled softly, those words taking her back over two years to Libra. The last of her nerves smoothed then, Hilde unknowingly reminding her of one of the very things that had drawn her to Heero to begin with. It was one of the few things that was clear to her, that feeling of complete trust where he was concerned, the trust that served as a foundation for every emotion she had felt for him. Oh, it was love, there was no doubt about it. Suddenly instead of watching the minutes go by in dread that she had to get ready in time, they weren’t going fast enough.

"He asked me to trust in him before," Relena whispered before continuing on in a stronger voice. "You’re right, and I know that. I just can’t help but be scared that I won’t do right by him. He deserves so much... so much I hope I can give him and help him with."

"Things he probably worries about, too," Hilde pointed out kindly. "Are you ready for marriage?"

"More than anything else in my life, I think."

Images began to flash through her mind... waking up with Heero beside her every morning, meals together, getting to know him in a way she felt at one time might only be a dream, talking, fighting, making up...

Hilde snapped her out of her thoughts as the other woman suddenly went in motion. "Then let’s get you ready to face it. I found you a pretty blue ribbon that can serve as a garter. Imagine Heero’s face when he sees that, eh?"

Relena blushed, still trying to not let her mind wander too much in *that* direction. Nerves about the ceremony had been bad enough, without wedding night jitters on top of it.

"If you weren’t nervous, we’d have to check you for human DNA, along with Heero. If I were marrying Duo," Hilde’s cheeks reddened as she continued, "I’d be out of my mind with nerves, hypothetically of course."

"Of course," Relena murmured.

Fifteen minutes later Relena looked at her reflection in the mirror. Hilde had done some magic to her hair, creating ringlets out of the normally straight locks and scooping them up in a classy twist. The light makeup she wore served to emphasize her flushed cheeks, and eyes that shone with anticipation. Resisting the urge to bite at her pink tinted lips, she surveyed the dress. It was simple, but flattering, partly because of the short notice, and partly because she didn’t feel that the "frills" were necessary. She would remember this dress until the day she died, and no amount of lace or ribbon would help to cement it further.

"He’ll forget his own name when he sees you," Hilde promised. "I don’t think you could have found a more perfect dress if you’d had a year to prepare."

Smoothing the full skirt one last time, Relena turned to Hilde and smiled what she hoped was her most confidant smile.

"Are we ready?"

"Almost..."

Reaching into her seemingly bottomless bag, Hilde surfaced with a small, whimsical bouquet of flowers.

"Duo said no bride was fit to marry unless she had flowers, and so we thought we’d donate to the cause since he didn’t think Heero’d remember."

"Or me," Relena said remorsefully.

There must have been five different colors of flowers in the bouquet, all assorted blues and reds and yellows. It was just perfect, as if someone had gathered a field of wild flowers, and arranged them so the colors created a rainbow medley of color.

"Now you’re ready."

Yes, now she truly was.

***

Relena walked slowly alongside Hilde as they approached the door. It would be a door of endings, but also of many beginnings. Beginnings she could only hope Heero wished for as well. It was one thing she couldn’t let herself dwell on. Of course he wanted a future for them, or else he wouldn’t be standing in that room waiting for her to join him, and for them to bind themselves together for a lifetime.

"You ok?" Hilde asked, concerned at the slight look of panic that had crossed Relena’s face.

"I’m ok, I promise. I’m so sure of this, there isn’t anything I could be otherwise," she answered comfortingly.

"You’re lucky," Hilde said wistfully. "I never knew back on Libra this would be where we’d end up, but I’m happy for you."

"Just knock some sense into him," Relena encouraged.

Hilde giggled, but stopped abruptly as the man whom she was instructed to knock some sense into came bolting out in front of them.

"There you two are!" Duo exclaimed. "Doncha know we have an antsy groom in there? It’s my head that’s on the line if Relena doesn’t make it."

He came around behind them and steered Hilde towards the door.

"You go in there and make sure he knows we’re coming. If I went back in he’d growl at me. Besides we gotta do this right, some has to walk her in, and looks like it’ll be me."

Hilde shot him a look as she entered, but it didn’t counter his grin. He whistled softly when he turned back to Relena.

"You’re looking good, lady. Gonna sweep him off his feet."

She shook her head slightly.

"I think wanting to look perfect for your wedding day is an interesting tradition. It’s a significant day in your life, but...it’s nice to know that who you’re marrying has seen you at your worst too, so it wouldn’t feel like such a sham."

"Some would doubt you’d be capable of a sham," he said with a wave of his hand. "Don’t sweat it. Heero’d take you in any off the wall thing, this is just icing on the cake."

"Is this the right thing, Duo? He wants this?"

"You love him, don’t you?"

There was little question there, she thought. "With all my heart I do."

"Then that’s all you need to know. He’s a big boy now, and it’s better than right if it makes you happy. Because that’ll make him happy, too, and don’t you doubt that."

"Thank you, Duo. You’ve done so much for us," she spoke thankfully, turning the bouquet of flowers in her hands.

"Nothing any friend wouldn’t do. Your happiness, his happiness, all the pilots, Hilde...it’s what I’ve got to live for now."

"And we love you, as well."

She hugged him softly, feeling the last of her nerves disappear. This was closer than friends, this was family. She couldn’t say that about all the pilots, no, but with Duo he was such a good person, with such character, that one couldn’t help but love him. She caught herself before she sniffled, and he took it as shaking.

"You’re not getting any second thoughts are you?" he asked wide eyed.

"No!" she replied shocked.

"Good," Duo said, smirking, "because I wouldn’t want to be the one to tell him you took off. I think we’d better be going though, before he thinks we ran off together. He’d really not be happy then."

"And I think neither would Hilde."

Taking that in stride, barely, he offered his arm to her, and led her into the room that would be the scene for her wedding.

The room wasn’t large to begin with, and with the justice of the peace and Hilde there along with Heero, it looked almost frighteningly small. In only a few steps they had reached Heero. Waiting pointedly for Heero to hold out his hand, Duo lay her hand in Heero’s firm grip. A sort of look of understanding passed between the two men that was lost on the other occupants of the room. Gently Heero guided her to stand directly in front of him, clasping both of her hands in his own. Duo and Hilde stood at an angle to them, both subconsciously focusing on the tiny cameras allowing them to capture this on film. They looked at each other, both having an _expression of disbelief. It was really happening.

As the justice began to speak Relena met Heero’s eyes. He looked slightly dazed, searching her eyes for some hidden answer. Their gaze never wavered, a connection so strong it tugged at both of them to lose themselves in the other’s eyes. The "I do’s" were solemn, a promise meant to last, both knowing the meaning of "Till death do us part" only too well. Then...then came the time for the traditional kiss. The person responsible for marrying them was a personable fellow, congratulating them and encouraging Heero to kiss his new bride. Heero was too distracted to glare at the man, or care about Duo’s triumphant smirking. His entire focus lay on Relena, on the ring she now wore so smooth against his fingers, and her lips so softly curving. Cursing his cowardliness, he leaned in abruptly, closing his eyes at the last second before their lips met. It was too quick to be called sweet, but a first kiss need not be perfect to be memorable. It was the emotion itself that would last for longer than the remembrance of feeling. There was a certain kind of magic in it, though neither of them could pinpoint exactly how it affected them.

Hilde reached them first after they parted, somewhat dazed, giving both a hug to Relena and a startled Heero. Duo, with great ceremony, kissed Relena’s hand, and shook hands with Heero. All that needed to be done was to sign a paper, and that was it. They had done it. Now, no matter if they called Heero or not, Relena was safe. She was Relena Yuy now, exchanging the name of one peace keeper for another. It was a concept so odd it was wondered if it were truly meant to be.

"OK, people. Now we should go and celebrate!" Duo grinned at Hilde, then at the newly married couple.

Relena looked at Heero, who gave no response as Hilde looked thoughtful.

"I think we should let them celebrate in private," she said quietly, with a sneaky wink to Relena who immediately began to turn red. "Congratulations, you two. Come on, Duo."

"But..."

"You can harass them later," she insisted as they walked off.

"I didn’t want to harass them! Think of the pictures!"

Hooking her arm through his, she smiled somewhat mysteriously.

"They can use all the time together that they can get. Don’t worry."

The two paused and turned, watching Heero and Relena, still linked at the hand, head towards Heero’s car.

"Looks like you’re right again."

"As usual. Come on matchmaker, let’s go home."

***

Hilde knocked lightly on Duo’s door. They had returned just earlier from the small building that had served as a church for Heero and Relena. She had changed immediately out of the formal clothes and into her pajamas, an adorable set of modestly cut shorts and tank top that Duo himself had bought. When she’d opened the package, she’d about had a heart attack seeing the misty blue fabric. And they had fit, too! He claimed a good eye, but she wondered if he had cheated and looked at her clothes. He didn’t buy her clothes very often, admittedly, it seemed from what he got from his mumbles that it was personal for a guy to buy a girl clothes. But he had seen them and thought of her. That was too sweet in her mind, as sweet as his wide eyed, slightly bashful _expression had been when he’d given them to her.

They had lived together for so many years it had become routine for them, grouchy mornings, cooking experiments, movie blowouts. But the line between them being friends, or exploring something deeper, had yet to be toed. She didn’t want to toe it, she wanted an all out stampede.

"Step right up!" he called by way of welcome. "Velcome to my lair."

She rolled her eyes at the mock evil chuckle he gave as she entered. "You’re very scary, Duo."

"I should be. Wanting to talk?" he asked, tugging off his tie.

"I thought we might."

He gestured to the bed. "Have a seat."

Walking to the far side of the bed, Hilde leaned up against the headboard and hugged one of his pillows to her chest. Duo’s dress shirt, shoes and socks were quickly discarded, leaving him in a white undershirt and slacks.

"I can’t believe we just came from Heero and Relena’s wedding. Could we have predicted this three years ago?"

"Could we have predicted anything three years ago?" she chuckled. "We hardly knew what tomorrow was going to be much less who might get married."

"Yeah, really."

Hilde watched raptly as he pulled the band from the end of his hair and nimbly began to unbraid it. She honestly wasn’t sure whether his hands or his hair caused her the most distraction in that moment. He almost caused her to jump as he slung the heavy mass over his shoulder. Her voice left her, though...she really wasn’t sure if that was a bad thing, because if she could talk, it would likely be along the lines of "come hither." His hands pulled the hem of his shirt out of his slacks, and over his head. If she hadn’t already been leaning against the headboard, she would have been sagging against the nearest sturdy object at the sight of his hair, all shining brown with subtle red hints, falling to flow freely around his hips. Seemingly not paying attention to her, the slacks went next. She stayed still, figuring he wasn’t intending to strip in front of her entirely, but was comfortable enough around her to undress without any worry. No matter the fact she was blushing within an inch of her life...and enjoying the sight of a nearly naked Duo immensely...maybe too much.

"Man, am I glad to be home," he said as flung himself face down and buried his head in the pillow next to her.

"That makes two of us. It was nerve wracking."

"I know! And we weren’t even the one’s getting married."

He propped himself up on his elbows and they stared at each other for a moment. His hair slid down to cover his shoulders, making her watch in amazement. It wasn’t possible this gorgeous man lay next to her.

"Hilde? You’re staring as if you’ve never seen my hair before."

She shifted.

"Not down a lot. It’s striking in a braid, but there’s something captivating about it when it’s down."

He grinned as she blushed again.

"Now there’s a compliment. It’s a heavy mess sometimes, but I wouldn’t cut it. Not unless...not for much anyway."

"I wouldn’t if I were you either. It would be a shame to lose it. What...what would you cut it for?"

He laid his head back on the pillow, hiding his face from her slightly.

"For you...if cutting it would save you, I’d part with it in an instant."

"Duo..."

Her hand involuntarily went to his head, stroking the same hair softly, feeling the strands catch her fingers, inviting her to dig in.

"Why do you take it out at night?"

"I’m a restless sleeper sometimes. Keeps it from breaking hairs. Mmm, feels good."

"Want me to continue?" she queried.

"Would you, Hilde?"

"Anything for you, Duo," she said softly. "I don’t have anything I could give up for you."

"You nearly gave your life!" he said indignantly, raising his head to glare at her. "There couldn’t possibly be more than that. Don’t even think that way. You have to live forever."

"Then so do you."

She pushed his head back to the pillow, smoothing back his hair, rippled from the braid, still damp in places it hadn’t been allowed to dry. It was beautiful, much like the man it graced. He moaned softly as her fingernails gently ran against his scalp, and down to his shoulder. His skin was so warm, and his hair was so soft... A soft near-snore broke her from her fascination.

She smiled at his _expression, knowing he was close to sleep. Leaning down she kissed his cheek softly, silently rejoicing in the opportunity to do so.

"Goodnight, Duo," she whispered.

His eyes opened to reveal slumberous violet as he pushed himself onto his side.

"Stay," he said, his voice husky from near-sleep.

Curving a hand around the back of her neck he drew her close to him, tucking her head between his neck and shoulder as he curled around her like a puppy seeking warmth. With a quiet sigh his breathing evened out, drifting into sleep. Hilde snuggled closer, taking in the feeling of being held so close, so tightly by those strong arms. The heat of his bare skin through her pajamas was so...so right, so comforting. I love you, Duo, she thought. If only...if only he could love her, too. If only it could be them saying those vows. But this, in her mind, was enough for now. Maybe, just maybe, one day they could hold each other every night, forever. With the scent of his skin filling her with contentment, and the feel of his hair twined between her fingers, she let herself join him in the darkness.

***



So, and away we go... the next part will be a first for me, reaching into the heights of higher ratings. *is still wide-eyed at the thought* But it should not be too very long... and certainly not months until the rest is presented. Hope you enjoyed!

*hoping the format of this is not messed up but cannot as yet tell*

Jen :0)

AIM: Coley Merrin