Thanks again for your patience and to all those still reading. Much love, Rose</p><p><b>Warning:</b> Strong 3xR hints.</p><b><p>Chapter 31</p></b>
<p>Relena sighed and watched Trowa push open the door to her hotel room. He drew his gun and stepped inside ? shutting the solid wood panel most of the way behind him. The procedure included him doing a thorough walk of the area before she was even allowed to enter. It was a bit of overkill in her estimation, but according to Colonel Une, there was no such thing as 'too careful'.</p><p>"All clear." Trowa gave her the signal and opened the door. She moved into the posh hotel suite complete with a sitting room, a kitchenette, and a separate sleeping quarter. Heavy drapes hung in front of the windows; Trowa had pulled them aside when he entered, but as late as it was, no light trickled in.</p><p>"I'm worried." Her friend's voice reminded Relena that he was still in the room.</p><p>She felt a ten-pound weight fall on her already tired shoulders; she dropped her briefcase onto the small coffee table. "About?"</p><p>"You."</p><p>Relena turned around and offered her friend a smile. "Don't be. I'm fine."</p><p>"You weren't fine the other night, Relena." The lighting in the room was dim, but even still, she could see the lines in his forehead, and the serious expression on his face. She moved to escape him ? and turn on the various lamps in the room.</p><p>"And I know?if you don't let it out, it will eat you alive."</p><p>"There's nothing more to say, Trowa." She flicked the wall switch. Yellow light saturated the room. "He's?out of my life."</p><p>"But has that ever been what you really wanted?" His voice was soft, but it still managed to reach into her heart and squeeze. Relena moved to the tall lamp in the corner ? near the window.</p><p>"Even if he'll never love you, you really don't want him?"</p><p>"No." She flipped another switch. The light reflected off the glass, and she caught a glimpse of her reflection ? cast in a golden hue. Her eyebrows peaked in the center of her forehead, and she looked like she was? <i>'I look so?so frail.'</i> Relena shut her eyes. Her right hand grabbed the stalk of the lamp for balance. She searched her emotions for anger or something else to give her strength. But all she felt was empty?tired.</p><p>"I can't help but care about him, and I want to be able to see him from time to time and know he's ok. I just?"</p><p>"It's ok if you want to cry, Relena." Trowa's voice was low. It had just the right tone to free some of the tears she had been holding back.</p><p>"God knows, anyone else would."</p><p>She shook her head. "But I'm not anyone else." She struggled to take in a deep breath. Relena opened her eyes and stared at her reflection. "And this was my choice."</p><p>"Was it really? Had it not been for the fact that you suddenly?"</p><p>"It was recorded, Trowa." She placed her left hand on the window sill, and released the lamp. "The three of them, just <u>deciding</u> what was best for me. Deciding my life, what was best for my heart..." Relena shut her eyes and rested her forehead on the cool glass.</p><p>"The fact that they knew you well enough?"</p><p>"Only makes it that much more miserable. They should have known it wasn't what I wanted." She steeled herself against the tears that still threatened to fall. Her right hand grabbed a fistful of drapes. "To be tricked, to be someone's obligation?"</p><p>His hand on her shoulder sent shivers down Relena's spine. "If I could replace him, even for a day?" Trowa murmured next to her ear.</p><p>Her heart dropped, and she felt an awkward fire light in her stomach. "I'm sorry. Maybe? Maybe in time? You know that if I could, I'd choose you a million times, Trowa." She brought her left hand up to cover the one on her shoulder. She opened her eyes and looked at his reflection. "I love you, it's just?not the same. At least, not right now. But I?I don't want to give you false hope or ruin what we have--"</p><p>"I know. I know." His reflection closed its eyes.</p><p>Relena looked away. "Do you think?"</p><p>"He's ok?" She felt his grip on her shoulder tighten. "I'm sure he is but I don't care."</p><p>"Duo said he went off somewhere." <i>'Why can't I get that out of my mind? And why would he leave?'</i></p><p>The hand yanked out from under her grasp. She saw his reflection turn away. "Yeah, well, he's an idiot."</p><p>She moved away from the window and started towards her room.</p><p>"My only concern right now is you, and why you're holding back your emotions."</p><p>She paused. Her legs felt like jelly beneath her body and she thought she might collapse right there. "I just don't want to dwell on it."</p><p>"I understand." His voice came closer. She wasn't sure if that made her feel better? Or worse.</p><p>"But the sooner you deal with this, the sooner you can move passed it." Both his hands came to rest on her shoulders. It sucked the stress right out of her body ? unfortunately, that was the only thing holding her together.</p><p>"It's a terrible truth, but one we must all unfortunately live with." He turned her around in his loose embrace. Relena fought her entire body's reaction ? the way her shoulders shook, the sobs that started in her stomach and rolled up into her chest.</p><p>She reached for him, and grabbed fistfuls of his shirt. "I'm so afraid."</p><hr size=1 width=100% noshade><p>It had taken Heero most of the day and two nights to read through the procedure manual and scan the all photographs into the system's Watch List. He might have finished it <u>and</u> gotten some sleep in that amount of time, if his neighbors hadn't been having another one of their all-night hump fests. The good news was that keeping his mind busy on work left little room to think about Relena.</p><p>The bad news was that driving wasn't an activity sufficient for keeping his mind fully occupied.</p><p>-</p><p><i>She tugged the knot out of the fabric strap; the front fell open. Relena wore a silky-looking slip of a nightgown underneath - and, from the looks of it, nothing else.</i></p><p>-</p><p><i>'No.'</i> Heero growled and set his mind back on the mission: drive to work and arrive on time for his first shift in the BioMet unit. It was already bad enough that he couldn't stand to sleep - especially in his bed - or do other, simple things like go into his room?</p><p>He'd moved his computer equipment to the living room and slept on the floor. Anything was better than going into that room. Unfortunately, he still had to make trips into his bedroom to use the bathroom and change clothes</p><p><i>'I can move my clothes to the laundry room ? it's more efficient, anyway.'</i> Heero tightened his grip on the steering wheel and glanced up at the red traffic light<i>. 'I wonder if the management has any rules about pissing off the balcony?'</i></p><p><i>-</i></p><p><i>He swept his tongue into her mouth and grabbed her waist with both hands; she tangled her fingers in his hair?</i></p><p>-</p><p>"L4 mining colony." He spoke out loud. "The turbulence in the government makes it somewhat unstable. Three factions fight for control of the Colonial Congress - one separatist, one favors annexation, and the third sits somewhere in the middle."</p><p><i>-</i></p><p><i>"Heero?." She ran her hands over his chest and then wrapped her arms around his ribcage. Her head came to rest just beneath his shoulder.</i></p><p><i>-</i></p><p>"Rebel forces have initiated skirmishes with the standing army. Relena's presence is as a mediator between the separatists and the centrists."</p><p>-</p><p><i>Her lips rained kisses over his neck and shoulders; as he lifted his head, her mouth found his throat, then his collar bone. </i></p><p>-</p><p>"She'll be?in danger most of the time, with inadequate protection," he recited to the rearview mirror. '?and if Barton lays one finger on her?"</p><p>A horn blared somewhere behind him. Heero blinked and noticed that the light had turned green - and he was still sitting. He hit the gas pedal and sped through the intersection.</p><p>-</p><p><i>"I want to make love to you?"</i></p><p>-</p><p>What was wrong with the human brain that it could <u>remember</u> exactly how she looked at that moment? Exactly how she smelled? Exactly how her lips tasted when he kissed her?</p><p>-</p><p><i>"Say it again?"</i></p><p><i>"I want?I want to make love to you, Heero."</i></p><p>-</p><p>A weight crushed his chest, and he found it hard to breathe. Somehow, the Preventer managed to steer the car into a space at headquarters before he gave into the desire to hunch over the steering wheel and gasp for air. Why did he feel like something was choking the life out of him? Where was this pain coming from? And why couldn't he just forget?.</p><p>"I love you," she whispered; he could swear it was like she was in the car next to him; if he tried, he could imagine her breath on his ear when she spoke.</p><p><i>'What's wrong with me?'</i></p><hr size=1 width=100% noshade><b>Thirty minutes later?</b></p><p>Heero's impression of Mwu LaFllaga was that the Lieutenant was too lax, didn't discipline his soldiers enough, and should be standing closer to attention than lying back in a chair with his feet propped up on the end of the table.</p><p>The blond-haired Lieutenant looked up when the door banged shut. "How did it go, Sergeant?"</p><p>Heero made eye contact with his superior, and hoped that the scowl he sent in the other man's direction conveyed his disapproval. "Mission complete."</p><p>"Good." A blond eyebrow quirked up, but the Lieutenant didn't move from his lax pose.</p><p>Heero glanced around the room. "Where are the other agents?"</p><p>"Today, there will be three on your shift." LaFllaga's voice always sounded like he was half-amused.</p><p>"The other two will be here in a moment. In the meantime, any of these monitoring stations will do." He removed one hand from behind his head and gestured at the tables in front of him. "Pick whichever one suits you." He finally sat up. His feet hit the tile floor with a loud clap.</p><p>"The pictures stream, naturally, on those LCDs up there. They provide the 'big picture'; but you'll also get smaller versions of the same feeds on these three monitors down here."</p><p>Heero followed as LaFllaga stood up and gestured to the different pieces of electronic equipment.</p><p>"The system does automatic checks, but you have the ability to interrupt and focus on specific people - anyone you think looks suspicious or familiar; you'll do a screen capture of the image, and then submit the query against the Watch List database."</p><p>Heero crossed his arms and glared at LaFllaga's back. "Right. I read the manual."</p><p>The Lieutenant turned back to face him. "Okay, hotshot. The luncheon starts in a half hour. We're already getting the closed-network feed. Security in the area says that everything looks good, looks clean. This should be a cake walk, but you know the political situation."</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>"Good. So, you know why we can't be too careful."</p><p>Heero nodded.</p><p>"Then get to work."</p><p>It was like a gate on a prison cell being opened. The Preventer paced to the monitor station closest to center in terms of where the LCD screens hung in the room. He sat down and didn't even have to tell his fingers what to do. They flew over the keys, inputting his password, and agent ID, and then he went about setting up his workstation the way he liked it.</p><p>Every so often, he'd glance up at the image on the LCD?</p><p>At first, it was nothing but idiotic people who set these types of things up. Little old ladies that were never nice - the ones that looked at him like he was akin to dirt beneath Relena's shoe back when he was with her on guard detail - fussed over last minute details and ordered the poor hotel maids (and anyone else who had the misfortune of setting foot in the banquet room) to go fetch this and that. It was disturbing to see the images play on the screen of what would normally be part of his job, and yet be unable to do anything about it. Several times, he found himself wanting to bark orders at this agent or that - tell them to check a deliveryman's ID or cordon off this walkway? There were too many mistakes being made. He found himself gripping the edge of the desk with white knuckles and trying to remember to breathe.</p><p>"Idiots," he mumbled at the screen.</p><p>"Hey hey, whaddya know." A loud male voice shouted from the entrance to the BioMet room. "New guy's here."</p><p>"Alan, you're not being nice. He's a member of the team, now."</p><p>"I know that. Watch, see, I'll be nice. Hey, new guy."</p><p>Heero snarled and turned around to see his two partners on this shift: one male, one female. The male agent was shorter than the Lieutenant, with spiky blond hair and glasses. He had a square jaw and smirk Heero didn't like. The young woman with him was a bit taller than Relena, thin, with a long, oval face. She wore little makeup and her light brown hair was pulled away from her face with one of those band things that Dorothy liked to wear. She was smiling; her hands clasped together in front of her chest. She seemed to be standing on one foot, the other was pointed down and her leg resting against the one keeping her upright. They both wore their Preventer jackets.</p><p>Heero nodded and turned back to his work.</p><p>"Aren't you?Heero Yuy?" The female agent asked in a small voice.</p><p>"Affirmative." He stared at the screen in front of him and then glanced up at the 'big picture'. He scanned the big picture monitors, looking for anyone suspicious.</p><p>"I've heard about you," the male agent, Alan, said.</p><p>"Hn."</p><p>He saw the girl step forward and offer her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Heero."</p><p>-</p><p><i>"Heero, why don't you go sit next to Relena?"</i></p><p><i>He sighted her easily in the crowd of students. Had he not known who she was, he still would have been able to find her by the way all the other kids glanced in her direction. But?he did know her.</i></p><p><i>He hadn't forgotten the day?all those years ago?</i></p><p><i>"It's nice to meet you, Heero."</i></p><p>-</p><p>Pain stabbed a sharp point into his chest. He closed his eyes, hoping it would pass.</p><p>"I always wanted to meet you in person." Alan spoke again. Heero didn't like the guy's voice. It sounded short, terse, like every word was being ground through his teeth to resound in the air.</p><p>'<i>I don't have time for this.' </i>He opened his eyes and glanced at the LCD screens in front of him. The security agents on screen seemed to be moving faster. <i>'It must be getting close to time.'</i></p><p>"Alan?"</p><p>"I always said if I got the chance?"</p><p>"They're about to start." Heero's eyes poured over the scene, staring at every face in turn. <i>'Are any of you?'</i></p><p>His chair spun beneath him, and Alan grabbed the front of Heero's shirt - hauling him out of his seat. Instinct kicked in; Yuy snatched the arm that was trying to hold him, and tore it away. His left arm struck out. He slammed his fist through Alan's cheekbone; the other agent's head whipped to the right.</p><p>"Stop it, both of you!"</p><hr size=1 width=100% noshade><p>Relena glanced over at Trowa and took a deep breath. No matter how many public speeches she gave, even a small talk like the one at this luncheon still set her stomach buzzing like it was filled with bumble bees.</p><p>-</p><p><i>"I'm so afraid." She clutched his shirt in both hands and felt her body sag against him. He held her upright.</i></p><p><i>"Of what? The pain?" His voice was husky in her ear.</i></p><p><i>"The pain, sure. I'm also afraid that?I haven't lost hope somewhere. I know, only someone who likes pain would say this, but?there were times?I thought that, I truly believed that, he cared about more than just?a mission."</i></p><p><i>"You could be correct."</i></p><p><i>She glanced up and tried to look him in the eye, but his eyes were closed. "But I?I just--"</i></p><p><i>"Shhh?." He wrapped his arms around her. It was a nice, warm embrace, but it only succeeded in making her heart ache worse than it did. Her knees felt weak as tears and terrible emotions came together from every part of her body to create a sucking hole in her stomach. Her legs gave out and she fell into the dark pit. Only Trowa's arms kept her from collapsing to the floor. "I've got you," he whispered. "It's okay. I won't let you fall."</i></p><p><i>-</i></p><p>"Five minutes to start." A male security agent whisked by and made the announcement in a loud voice.</p><p>Her escort leaned over and whispered in her ear.</p><p>"Half these women have hearing aids. It doesn't matter what you say, they probably won't hear most of it."</p><p>Relena glanced up at Trowa. Both corners of his mouth were turned up in a slight smile. She shook her head, but felt a little less nauseated. "You're terrible."</p><p>He shrugged. "Just telling you my observations."</p><p>She had to laugh. "Uh-huh. Is that supposed to ease my mind? Or should I be concerned you're paying that close of attention to all the little old ladies in the room?"</p><p>He shot her a look over his shoulder; one eyebrow lifted. "One of them could be a terrorist."</p><p>"Or your date for the evening." Relena gave his arm a light squeeze.</p><p>He turned all the way around and frowned at her. "Ouch."</p><p>She raised one hand to her mouth and let out a small laugh.</p><p>"That wasn't very nice."</p><p>"I'm sorry." She giggled at his hurt expression. "I didn't mean it. I was only?"</p><p>"Three minutes to start." The head L4 security agent called out and sent a flurry of suited agents scurrying towards darker corners and exit doors. "Perform system check and connection to BioMet. Minister?"</p><p>She nodded. "I'm ready." Her hand found Trowa's, or was it the other way around? He pressed her fingers with his thumb.</p><p>-</p><p><i>Her body convulsed and she clutched his jacket. Sobs bubbled up from her chest and Trowa knelt to lower them both to a sitting position on the floor.</i></p><p><i>"Why? Why did he do this?"</i></p><p><i>Her friend stroked his fingers through her hair.</i></p><p>-</p><p>"Relena, I know it's not the right time?" His voice was low; his breath on her ear sent traitorous shivers down her spine.</p><p>"And I know?you're not yet over?"</p><p>She turned her head and met his eyes. Hard emerald turned soft, they looked almost like liquid. Relena caught her breath and didn't know whether to hope he did, or hope he didn't? She closed her eyes an instant before she felt his lips brush against her mouth.</p><p><i>-</i></p><p><i>"Why was I such an idiot?"</i></p><p><i>"It's okay?." He tucked pieces of her hair behind her ear. The gesture felt soothing.</i></p><p>-</p><p>His kiss was soft, warm, with just the right amount of pressure against her lips to somehow induce them to respond. Her pounding heart turned to stone, and her chest became an empty cage. She pulled away. His eyes were closed.</p><p>"One minute, Minister," the head security agent said.</p><p>"Trowa, I-I?"</p><p>-</p><p><i>She choked. He held her closer. Her own arms wrapped around his shoulders and her head settled just over his heart. </i></p><p><i>"I hate him."</i></p><p>-</p><p>"You have to go." He managed to hiss the words through the tight line of his mouth.</p><p>"Thirty-seconds. Anytime you're ready, Minister."</p><p>Too many things, emotions, memories? Everything swirled around her like she was standing in the middle of a giant pot of stew ? and someone was stirring it. The liquid worked its way beneath the heels of her shoes and threatened to throw her into the churning soup. She grabbed for Trowa's arm. "Are?Are you?"</p><p>"Go, Relena." He opened his eyes. His brow was drawn into a deep frown; his green eyes had lost that soft look, but seemed to spark with newfound energy. She took a step back.</p><p>A different announcer interrupted over the in-house PA system: "We're in position. Minister Darlian, are you ready?"</p><p>She glanced up at Trowa; he turned away. Relena took a deep breath and hit the small communicator button in the pin she wore on her right shoulder. "I'm ready," she said with a nod that the minister was sure the upstairs security booth could now see.</p><p><i>"Why can't I just hate him?" She relaxed into Trowa's arms and let him hold her, rock her, and shush in her ear. Warmth began to worm its way into her skin and fill some of the emptiness.</i></p><p>Relena straightened her shoulders and finally stepped out into the room.</p><p><i>-</i></p><p><i>"That's why it's called love."</i></p><hr size=1 width=100% noshade><p>Alan staggered back. Blood dripped from the right side of his mouth. He glared at Heero and hunkered down like he was going to charge again. "You fuckin asshole!"</p><p>Lieutenant La Fllaga re-appeared and ran into the middle of the fray. "What's going on?" His voice, for once, didn't sound amused. He extended both arms, placing one hand on each of the combatant's chest in an attempt to hold them back.</p><p>"<u>You</u> let him on this team." Alan wiped at his mouth and lunged forward. The Lieutenant pushed him back.</p><p>Heero stepped towards his chair. "It's a temporary assignment. Get over it."</p><p>La Fllaga had to use both hands to keep Alan back. "Easy."</p><p>"I don't want to take it easy," he shouted. "I want to kick his ass."</p><p>"Easy!"</p><p>"I know you care about her, Alan," the female agent spoke up for the first time since their introduction. "But fighting isn't going to solve anything!"</p><p>"Shut up, Milly!" Alan stopped struggling. He turned his fierce gaze on the girl.</p><p>She ignored his demand. She glanced at Heero and then down at the floor. "He's?rather fond of Minister Darlian."</p><p>LaFllaga chuckled. "Aaaaah, so that's it. Got a bit of a crush, Alan?"</p><p>"Shut up, Lieutenant." Alan shoved his superior away and tugged his jacket back down to his waist. "I'm not a little boy."</p><p>"You're acting like one."</p><p>Heero watched it all happen with only one eye. The female agent seemed to want to talk to him.</p><p>"When he was a teenager, she came to his school, and she was the one who inspired him to become a Preventer."</p><p>The other man scowled and stomped over to the station farthest from Heero's.</p><p>LaFllaga moved over to stand in front of Milly. He jerked a thumb at the newest member of the BioMet team. "So what's that got to do with Mr. Morale over here?"</p><p>"Welllllllll?." She turned her head. "That's a bit harder?"</p><p>"She was crying." Alan interrupted in a loud, accusing voice. "Last night. She said that guy's name and broke down into tears. I don't know what he did?"</p><p>Heero felt his legs give, and sunk down into his chair. He wanted to shut out the distractions, and concentrate on the feeds. That was his job. His duty. And Relena?</p><p><i>'Dammit, Relena, you could be miserable here. You could cry here. You didn't have to go away to?'</i></p><p>"You know you don't have authorization for that feed." The Lieutenant's voice dropped to a lower pitch. Heero glanced up from the monitors to follow this bit of conversation.</p><p><i>'Authorization? Which feed is that?' </i>He turned to look at Alan. The question found its way to the tip of his tongue, but Heero held it back. This wasn't the time.</p><p>The other agent glared. "I don't know what you did, asshole, but if I ever get the chance, I'm going to skin you alive." He shouted. "It's not the first time you've made her cry, but I'll be damned if it's not the last!"</p><p>"The luncheon's about to start. Ridder."</p><p>Heero followed the conversation and glanced over at LaFllaga. The Lieutenant stood with his arms crossed over his chest and an uncharacteristic scowl on his generally-amused features.</p><p>"You're not permitted to volunteer for night duty for the next two weeks. Is that clear?"</p><p>Heero shifted to look at Alan.</p><p>The agent stared at the monitor in front of him for another moment before he bowed his head and closed his eyes. "Yes sir."</p><p>"Sergeant."</p><p>Heero didn't look up. He returned his focus to his work. Apparently, ignoring him didn't make the Lieutenant go away. He had that in common with Duo.</p><p>"After your shift, Sergeant, come find me. You and I need to have a talk."</p><hr size=1 width=100% noshade><p><b>Ten minutes later?</b></p><p>The images continued to play out on the numerous screens. At about five minutes before the 'show', sound crackled and blared into the room.</p><p>"Back halls are clear." Crackle. "Security checkpoint secured."</p><p>"Exit clear." Static. "Security checkpoint in place and secure."</p><p>"Lobby clear. Team two will continue surveillance." Pop. Pop. Static.</p><p>"We're in position. Minister Darlian, are you ready?"</p><p><i>'She's late.'</i> Heero glared at the monitor, looking for anything or anyone who looked even remotely out of place. But so far, he'd seen nothing. The team that L4 had put in place to ensure Relena's safety appeared to have done an adequate job. But he didn't like that, so far, he hadn't seen her, hadn't been able to verify her position with his own eyes. All he could do was listen to the reports from others?</p><p>"You know, if you grip those controls any harder, they will break off," the female agent, what's her name, said from her position to his right.</p><p>He glanced down at where he held the joystick control; he guessed he was grasping it a little tight when his knuckles were a sickly looking yellow-white. "Hn." He eased his grip just in time to hear Relena speak - for the first time since he'd left her at her office, so many days ago?.</p><p>"I'm ready," her voice said an instant before her image came on screen; she nodded at the camera.</p><p>She looked?Heero assessed the heavier application of makeup under her eyes, the ever-so-slight line on her neck where the darker foundation gave way to the paler hue of her natural skin? She seemed tired. Her eyes, however, still had that spark of determination, and the set of her mouth showed that she wasn't nearly so lost?.</p><p>It reminded him of the words she spoke to him that night. The night of their 'date' at Club Swing.</p><p>-</p><p><i>"Why won't you let me protect you, Relena?"</i></p><p><i>Her head bowed and he strained to hear her speak over the blaring music, but her words couldn?t have been any clearer if she?d shouted them into the club?s massive sound system.</i></p><p><i>"Because I don't need you anymore."</i></p><p><i>-</i></p><p><i>'Relena?Why?' </i>He silently asked her image on screen.<i> 'Why did you give up on me?'</i></p><p>She stepped into the room, and immediately, the women in attendance got to their feet. Relena held up an arm in greeting, and smiled. She paced in a confident-looking manner to the podium at one end of the hotel banquet room.</p><p><i>"Because I don't need you anymore."</i></p><p>The applause was deafening.</p>
Yeah, but what about when you have to take a dump Heero, what about that?
YES!:bounce: YES!:bounce: YES! 
