Bleeding Shell [Introspective Ficlet]

[Andrea]

Bleeding Shell
By Andrea Sinisterra
Angst
Rated PG-13
Standard Disclaimers Apply

This is a companion piece to Dance of Faith which was from Relena's POV. This is from Heero's POV, set during that transition in his life when he went from being a heartless assassin, to a person who fought for a genuine, authentic ideal.

Hope you all like it.


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It stared back at him, cast in shallow darkness, scarred by the light around him. Its eyes stared into nothingness, drowning in a shadowed void permanent within his being. Living in the empty shell of his soul. Smearing the sadness of his life across the breaking canvas in its wake; catapulting its hatred, its resentment, its utter agony beyond the bleeding horizons.

It reflected the blue-bled ebony of his eyes, dancing ghosts of past atrocities smiling triumphantly. They raised fists in glory; slashing blades through souls, murdering the light all-around. These ghosts with no heart or conscience, these ghosts who lived from day to day, smiling in bleeding victory, succeeding mission after murderous mission; accomplishing blazing targets with absolute, unwavering will.

The breath left his lungs in pants of agony, heavy lead burdening his conscience. The ever-present onus of his so-called soul tremendously weighted down by his overpowering, inconsiderate will. Further still. Goal-oriented, always, concerning no remorse whatsoever. No guilt, no second thinking. No consideration.

Heartless.

Despicably, unrepentantly heartless.

He stared at his reflection, his image drowning in a pool of blood, grinning mirthlessly; the ghosts, once again, succeeding.

Countless souls lay in his vicinity. Boneless, sightless, breathless, unmoving. Dead. Vacant. Absent. Gone? like himself. The ghosts have taken over his entire being, taken possession of the empty shell of his body and soul, commanding execution after execution. Countless sums of souls having been absorbed by the merciless ghosts.

The bloodshed, the carnage, it was violence in its truest form. He was the bringer of mayhem, chosen to punish Earth; the vessel from down under, assigned to slaughter those who refused to cooperate, to murder those who refused to follow, who foiled his mission.

A slayer. The Perfect Executioner.

His reflection betrayed nothing, and as he sat there in disgusted stupefaction, he considered, rethinking, trying to picture the lives he had ended prematurely. But it was an impossible task, for infinity had no end. It would take him several eternities to count them, and several more to be sure he had remedied his butchery? even though there was no forgiving the magnitude of his misjudged mistakes.

And so this way, as he stood up, leaving his mirror of pain and ignoring his scornful ghosts, he understood his new purpose. His new mission. That light which he had run from before, that mercy which he had despised, that grandness he had abhorred, he would embrace them and let them embrace him; let them be his guidance, his redemption.

Shedding that stoic, assassin?s skin, veiling it, he walked into the light? and let it fill the void in his soul with its everlasting healing warmth.

The End.

[lilac310]

you definitely have a great command of the English language..your words are so eloquent...very touching...keep it up!

[Andrea]

Thank you very much, Lilac. And thanks for praising my English! It pleases me like you've no idea.

[Mellie]

Oh my! That totally grabbed my attention and pulled my heart strings. I felt his pain and anguish, and then I felt him step away. The soft tightness in my chest always kicked up from where I started reading, but the end always eased it away. Awesome job! I agree with lilac that it was very eloquent. It flowed just perfectly to describe pain!

[Andrea]

Well, Heero is a very conflictive, bitter, confused guy... and I believe he must have felt very lost when he realized how the world was really working around him and against him, and to which side he belonged... He's very strong-willed, and relentless, but I still think he always followed his emotions... That's the Light in this story.

Anyway, thanks, Mellie! Your review made me smile like a dork.