I love You

[Angeldreams]

A/N: I don?t own GW, unless I?m asleep, and I don?t own ?I love you,? by Sarah McLachlan.

Warnings: Sap, First attempt at songfic.

++

A beautiful young woman walked alone down the busy street, her smiling face lighting up at those who crossed her path. She was the picture of elegance, grace, and kindness, but to one young man who saw her as she unknowingly approached him, she had a touch of sadness. Musing at the cause of it, he looked directly at her in the middle of the busy street, knowing his presence would soon get her attention.

Relena: I looked up to find a handsome man with dark hair and brilliant blue eyes intensely starring at me, as if waiting for me to notice him. My body prickled with recognition and happiness, and I couldn?t have fought the smile that hurt my face because I got to be near him one more time. He, on the other hand, never changed his expression. He simply stopped walking and leaned against an old lamppost near the stoplights. I join him quickly, my thoughts jumbling between excitement and a girlish crush that I had long since figured I was over. I was so wrong, I thought, looking into his deep eyes. The murmur of the crowd disappeared, yet we hadn?t said anything to each other. It had been so long.

//I have a smile,
Stretched from ear to ear,
To see you walking down the road.
We meet at the lights,
I stare for a while,
The world around us disappears.//

I finally break the silence between us. ?Heero,? I hear myself saying, stressing your name as if I could wrap all my feelings into it and you would know. It had been years since I last saw you. But I was not angry; I was not afraid. I knew if I needed you, you would be there. I had hoped of a better life for you, and although I was sorry that you had left, I was happy that you had moved on with your life. But would you understand what had happened since then? Would you understand the person that I have become? Did you know that I could never have considered a life without you until you left? Didn?t you know that I wanted to be the one to make everything okay for you? I wanted to heal the invisible wounds of war? I wanted to be the one you found love with.

//Just you and me on my island of hope,
A breath between us could be miles.
Let me surround you,
My sea to your shore,
Let me be the calm you seek.//

We exchange meaningless pleasantries, as you have always been able to see right through me. My heart beats so quickly that I figured you could have seen it. I had so much to say to you, so much to tell you, but I can?t. I can?t drag you back into the continuous battle for peace. I want so much more for you. Do you know that? Have you moved on? Do you have a family? Have you found love? As if sensing my inner turmoil, you touch my cheek, lifting my head to meet you gaze. You stare at me for a few seconds and leave me to watch you as you disappear once again in the crowd.

//Oh and every time I?m close to you,
There?s too much I can?t say and you just walk away.//

My heart cries after you, but I cannot move. It is better this way, my mind tells me. But I still wish you knew. I think - even if you didn?t feel the same way, which somehow I know you do ? I think it would help heal you somehow. But I can?t tell you. I never have been able to.

//And I forgot to tell you I love you
And the night?s too long
And cold here without you,
I grieve in my condition,
For I cannot find the words to say
I need you so.//

Quietly, I whisper to the crowd around me, ?I?ve lost you again, Heero.? No one hears me or sees me. Again, I am alone, but strangely satisfied. Even if I could only see you briefly ever so often, I find that I can live longer. My heart doesn?t break. I know that I can go on, even if it is for you and not me. I pause for a minute, closing my eyes and picturing you ? you hair, face, and especially your eyes. I imagine what it would be like to kiss you again. I wonder what your life is like. I wonder if I will ever get to see you again. My heart sinks at that thought, but not for long, as I know you will always find a way to me as long as you can. I smile at that and leave our meeting place. I can confidentially face any future as long as I know you are alive somewhere and facing it with me.

//Oh and every time I?m close to you
There?s too much I can?t say and you just walk away,
And I forgot to tell you that I love you
And the nights too long and cold here without you.//

Heero: I may have disappeared in the crowd from her, but it doesn?t mean I?m gone. I?m never gone. I?m always with her, no matter where she is. A year ago I realized why and that I needed her. But how can you need someone like her? How can you be selfish with someone?s time like hers? How can I tell her these things? Does she understand why I disappeared again? Does she know I know her better than she knows herself? Does she know that everyday, every night, every moment I am alive, I will love her? As long as she?s here, I can face my destiny. I see her walk off, a genuine smile replacing the sad one she had earlier, and know she?s okay. A small smile forces its way to my face, too, knowing I was too.

[Crystaltear]

I love this song! I always thought that the song fit Heero and Relena perfectly. You incorporated the song well with your story-- a good dose of sap is always needed once in awhile, though I thought it bordered on bittersweet. Great fic ^_^

[Goldberry]

Ooooooooooo, nice ficlet, Angel! I just love to read these vignettes sometimes, especially if they are uplifting like this one is. Very good job, and I like the way you protrayed Relena in this. So descriptive and flowing. The only thing I would point out is you had some mistakes concerning what tense you were using, but besides that, it was perfect! ^_^ Very nice job, I'm glad I caught this one!

*hugs*
Berry

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Goldberry on 2002-07-07 21:00 ]</font>

[Tomorrow]

Awww, that was very sweet, and I must say nicely written. I think you captured Relena's feelings for Heero perfectly, and I think you gave an interesting spin on his (so gentle was he, yet not overly sappy for his character). Very well done, and I hope you'll end up writing a sequel. ^_^