Rating: PG13 for language
Category: Humor
Disclaimer: Don't own...so sad.
Relaxing Bath
The two girls sighed, relaxing in the hot springs. Sango rolled her shoulders back and yawned, blinking tears out of her eyes as they focused on the young kitsune reclining in front of her. Shippou was an odd sight, floating in that odd tubular device that Kagome had brought back from her side of the well. It was the old clashing with the new? Well, Shippou was not old, though he most definitely would be in Kagome's time. Surely? Another yawn cut off this tiring train of thought.
Something hot and wet splattered across Sango's face. She instantly jerked her head toward the cause of the interruption to find Kagome absently flicking her fingers through the water. With another shake of the head to whip the water droplets off of her eyelashes, Sango spoke affectionately to the younger girl. "Kagome-chan, please."
Kagome blinked at Sango. "Nani?" she asked innocently, continuing the flicking motion and splattering Sango with warm droplets.
"Kore wa." Sango indicated her splashing fingers with her own, flickering twinkling droplets of water onto Kagome's hair. Kagome's eyes widened and she looked from her hand to Sango and then back again, quickly blushing and hiding the offending limb behind her back. Sango cocked her head, catching the blush and raised her eyebrows. "Is something troubling you, Kagome-chan? Inuyasha hasn't gone to see Kikyou in a long period of time."
Kagome blushed deeper, turning away from her friend. "No, I was just thinking. And, anyway, Inuyasha has every right to go see Kikyou."
"But you have to admit you get angry when he goes," Sango stated.
"And you get upset when the dog-breath runs off without saying anything," Shippou said matter-of-factly.
"And that??"
"Okay, okay, I get it!" Kagome shouted, looking almost cross-eyed in anger. "Fine! I get mad when Inuyasha goes to see Kikyou, but I don't blame him for it! Besides, I wasn't even thinking about that."
"Well, Kagome-chan, what were you thinking about then?"
"Miroku, actually."
Noticing the shocked look of the other two, she quickly rebounded. "Not like that! Don?t look at me like that, you two! I was thinking of what it must be like to??"
"??be a perverted Houshi?" Sango added.
"??touch Sango and get hit every time and get brain-damage?" came Shippou's thought.
Kagome stared at them. She sighed. "No, I was actually going to say have a hole in my right hand."
Then, the demon exterminator paused, looking thoughtful. "I have often wondered this myself, Kagome-chan."
"Oh, really? You've wondered about Miroku, Sango-chan?" Kagome's voice was now cunning as she cocked an eyebrow. Sango blushed deeply.
"Not like that!"
The other girl frowned, then grinned evilly. Sango blinked, suddenly shocked at the resemblance Kagome held to Inuyasha. Kagome, noticing her shocked stare, stopped, her face drawing into a look of question. "Sango-chan, what's wrong?"
Sango then smirked. "Nothing."
"What?"
"Oh, it was just that you just reminded me of Inuyasha." Sango displayed a full grin.
Kagome scowled. "Well, you put me in mind of your Houshi-sama just then."
Sango blushed and frowned. "What? I can't??" Then her face drew a dangerous mask on. "What do you mean, my Houshi-sama?"
The other girl smiled and turned away. "You said it, I didn't."
The exterminator rose in mock anger. "Oh! You'll pay for that, Kagome-chan!"
"Oh, really? I'd like to see you try." Turning her back to Sango, Kagome grinned to herself.
The grin disappeared when Kagome felt herself doused in warm water. She spun and raised one finger upward, standing straight up in the water and striking a pose, her dark hair plastered in her face and over her eyes. "Now you've done it! Sango-chan, you've crossed the line! Prepare to be struck down with my water splash of doom!" The statement was completed with an elaborate twirl of the finger and water droplets being blow comically off of the tip of her nose.
Sango raised her eyebrow and crossed her arms. "Surely you can think of something better than the 'Water Splash of Doom'!"
The other girl frowned. "I don't know? What do you think?"
Shippou floated by, a bored expression on his face. "How about 'The Attack of the Deadly Waternymphs'?"
"Nah, too long," Sango stated.
Then, a mini-tidal wave struck the demon exterminator in the face. Sputtering, Sango wiped her bangs away from her eyes and searched for her attacker with narrowed eyes and her lips pinched shut. The younger girl was nowhere in sight. Throwing back her head, Sango shouted. "Prepare to be exterminated, Evil Miko Waternymph!"
"The Evil Miko Waternymph answers your call!" Kagome leapt out from behind a rock, splashing Sango with all her might and laughing so hard it was almost painful only to find no one was there. Feeling the hairs on the back of her neck prickle, she slowly turned around fearing the worst, and found herself face to face with her supposed victim. There was only a moment allowed before her eyes widened and Kagome was yet again doused with water.
"Sango-chan! Wait till I get my arrows!"
"Would you like to go up against my Hiraikotsu?"
"Ack! Well, we'll see if you can even get there! Prepare to be purified, Evil Exterminator Waternymph!"
"Watch out, Kagome-chan! I'm going to be thinking of Miroku when I hit you with my Hiraikotsu!"
These comments, accompanied by screams and shrieks and occasional bouts of laughter floated upward to a certain hanyou's alert ears. Inuyasha rose, clutching his Tetsusaiga and scowling as he placed his half-eaten bowl of Ramen on a boulder. Miroku noticed his movements and followed suit, his face drawn in the lines of worry. "Is something wrong, Inuyasha?"
"It sounds like someone's fucking attacking."
"The girls are in danger?"
"Keh."
"Let's go!"
The men raced toward two unsuspecting females.
Inuyasha leapt to a halt in the middle of a small pool, annoyed at having to get wet, but mostly worried about Kagome. "Kagome? Oi, bitch, where are you?"
Then, out of nowhere, the unsuspecting inu-hanyou was tackled from the front, shocked beyond moving as he fell unceremoniously with something warm, wet, and very naked on top of him. "K-Kagome?"
"Hah! Sango, that was a great Inuyasha imperson?ACK! Inuyasha! OSU??"
"WATER!"
"OOH! ALRIGHT, THEN!" There was a painful smacking noise and a cry of pain that escaped the injured hanyou.
* * * *
"Sango??Ite!"
Miroku found himself thrown forward. Sango rolled over in the water, laughing. "I got you??"
The monk quickly grabbed her hands, seizing an opportunity. "If you wanted me that badly, all you had to do was ask??"
There was a sharp crack and a pain-filled cry.
* * * *
The two girls raced toward the center of the bathing pool, where their clothes were at that moment. Unfortunately, in the gathering mist, they were not able to make out each other, and slammed forcefully together.
Without a thought, two hands, one in a fist, the other palm, collided with two tender faces.
Kagome held the flat of her hand over her cheek. "Ite, ite, ite, ite, ite?"
"Damn, who taught you how to punch, Kagome-chan?" Sango hissed as she held a fist up to her eye.
* * * *
Miroku and Inuyasha, meanwhile raced forward, colliding painfully only to crouch in fear of each other. Inuyasha was careful to cover his tender eye as he quickly spoke. "Gomen, Kagome! Stupid bitch, please, don't??"
"Sango, dear, please think this over before you hit??"
Soft laughter found them both cowering, half submerged in the bathing pool. Inuyasha and Miroku peeked over upraised arms to find a red-cheeked Kagome and a black-eyed Sango watching them from over a refuge of rocks. It took only a moment before everyone was laughing hard, Inuyasha pointing to Kagome's cheek and Miroku to Sango's eye and visa versa. Of course, that only lasted about ten seconds before everyone burst into angry shouts.
"What the hell were you doing down here?!"
"What the hell are you asking that for bitch?! We were--"
Meanwhile, Shippou was pulling on his kimono with care and grace, his face covered in a wise expression of exasperation. "Do you think they'll ever grow up, Kirara?"
The cat mewed softly before trotting with Shippou back to camp to finish off the dinner for the night. Ramen was always a wonderful thing after a hectic day.
* * * *
"What happened to my ramen?" Inuyasha shouted.
There was a series of sniffing noises then another shout. "You brat! You'll pay for eating my food!"
"What do you mean, your food? Kagome brought it back from her time!"
There was a smack noise then the kitsune spoke again. "KAGOME!
Inuyasha's hitting me!"
"Cut it out, you two! I'm trying to sleep and my face hurts!"
"What do you think my eye feels like, bitch?"
"You're a hanyou! You're used to getting beat up! And I thought I was just
a weak human girl!"
"You are! But you hit me!"
"You saw me naked!"
"So, I see you naked all the time!"
An eerie silence descended on the camp and only the faint crackling of the fire was heard. A soft sound of realization was emitted by the silver haired male as he realized his fate.
"Inuyasha. OSUWARI, OSUWARI, OSUWARI, OSUWARIIIIII!"
"Goodnight, Houshi-sama."
"Goodnight, Sango."
"Ite?" came the grumbled and weak moan from a certain inu-hanyou.
"Goodnight, Sango-chan. Goodnight, Miroku. Goodnight, Shippou-chan. Goodnight, Kirara. Hmph."
That wasn't too bad, was it?
Well, i just started japanese, and if i made a mistake in that one tiny part, please tell me. "Kore" means that, so i just...well, you get the point.R&R, please!
[Inuyasha cracks his claws.]: "You heard the bitch, review!"
[Paxbanana blinks.] "Bitch? Kagome...?"
[Kagome raises a finger.] "You know what i told you about calling innocent
bystanders 'bitches'!"
[Inuyasha huffs.] "Does she look innocent to you?"
[Paxbanana.] :evil: oops, no
[Kagome blinks.]
[Inuyasha blinks.]
[They both slowly edge away.]
Pu-lease! R&R
:lol: We need more stories like that in this forum...in ALL the forums! Yeah! Write more!
that was cute, and the forum could use more.
