[FIC] Chapter 05/?? End in Fire 3

Mission briefing: KGB threatening code name WHISPERED candidates. Believed target: Kaname Chidori, 16, Tokyo, Japan.
Mission status: Critical<br>
Mission personnel: Sergeant Magjor Melissa Mao; Sgt. Kurz Weber, and Sgt. Sousuke Sagara, Arm-Slave specialist; Mission objective: To protect Kaname Chidori from KGB kidnapping plot, without alerting the Japanese gov't or target as to the identity of super-secret military organization, code-named MITHRIL. <br>
Kaname: Why are you following me?!
Sousuke: It's just coincidence.

Moderators: blackrose, Beck

Post Reply
HELLFIRE
Coordinator||Plotting nightly on how to 'get' Kyo
Posts: 61
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 8:58 pm
Contact:

[FIC] Chapter 05/?? End in Fire 3

Post by HELLFIRE »

AN: Strong language and controversial situation(s), so I'm putting this
chapter off-site on my page... but then again, that probably makes it
more attractive to everyone.

I do STRONGLY warn EVERYONE about it though, I found it no
laughing matter when I wrote those sections...

// end warning... do enjoy!




Regards
---
Regards

"What'd'ya expect?! I'm a demon, not a comedian!" -- InuYasha

Shinobi
Coordinator||Plotting nightly on how to 'get' Kyo
Posts: 73
Joined: Thu Jun 05, 2003 1:01 am
Location: Dallas, TX

Post by Shinobi »

liked the bit about how Mithril is funded and operates...closely mirrored my own views on the matter.

there does seem to be a problem with transitions in your work.

Sometimes it's hard to follow what and where has gone before to explain what is happening now. (vauge I know)

and stuff
"I had the thearpy group liquidated. They were insolent."

-Dr. Evil, Austin powers

darkbane
Pilot Candidate||Goddess in Training
Posts: 37
Joined: Thu Sep 11, 2003 5:08 am
Location: Austria, Terra

Post by darkbane »

well we're all waiting for the promised 'transition back' to the _real_ story, ie the kaname/souske thing that's been covered in oh-so-many-but-not-quite-enough other fanfics :)
--=[ Lightbringer ]=--
"Angels banished from heaven are forced to become demons." --Vicious

HELLFIRE
Coordinator||Plotting nightly on how to 'get' Kyo
Posts: 61
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 8:58 pm
Contact:

Post by HELLFIRE »

Shinobi wrote:there does seem to be a problem with transitions in your work.
*hehe* You sound like a speech instructor I had there, Shinobi.
There was alot of non-Sousuke / Kaname material I wanted to cover
in the End in Fire arc, but I wanted to limit the arc to no more than
three chapters, so it gets quite squeezed... sorry to throw you around,
I just hope I didn't throw anyone off jumping around like that :)

@darkbane
If that's your subtle hint to get the next chap finished and posted... :-P



Other than that, hope everyone's enjoyed the read so far... here's
a 'whet your appetite' preview for the next chap






Regards
"SO WHAT THE HELL DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!?! HUH?!?!"

"Chidori... it's all a coincidence."

"...NGH!!"

...5...4...3...2...

"Wrong answer, Sagara-kun..."

"WHY YOU...!!!" The final straw gone, Chidori's hand made for her halisen, and in a major-league swing, connected it with Sousuke's head. He went down with a solid thump, but Chidori wasn't finished there, jumping onto his prone form to administer a solid beating.

"I'LL GIVE YOU COINCIDENCE, YOU...(whack!)!!"

...Houston, we have lift-off...

"She's in love?"

"Yup." Kyouko and Mizuki looked over at Chidori and Sagara, and what a sight to behold. Chidori, showing no signs of letting up her physical assault on Sagara anytime soon, had run out of Japanese invective to yell at him, and was starting on her American repetoire, all the important four letter ones anyways. Poor Sagara, beaten to a curled up fetal position, was desperately trying to fend off Chidori's halisen, and doing a poor job of it. The sounds the paper fan beating made, coupled with Sagara's uncharacteristically pathetic-sounding pleas of mercy, caught the attention of the entire shopping district.

"Should we stop her?"

"Ummm..."
---
Regards

"What'd'ya expect?! I'm a demon, not a comedian!" -- InuYasha

Eden
Bishounen Strip Club Special Guest|Mobile Armor Pilot in Training
Posts: 368
Joined: Sun Apr 13, 2003 3:01 pm
Location: Left reminissing of times past

Post by Eden »

Great fic! I especially liked the teaser you put up, but now that means that you have to update! Oh the suspence!!

Well until next time, keep up the awesome work!

~Eden
"We seem dead set on turning ourselves into little monsters, don't we? Wonder why that is? It's all the rage all of a sudden. And all of us, is sooo busy running around, trying to beat each other to the finish line that no one notices the big sign from God that says : Stop-Messing-with-my-Stuff." Doc Conners - Ultimate Spiderman Volume 3


The dust bunnies and the plot bunnies are conspiering, . . . I think thats why I keep loosing all my socks.

Post Reply

Return to “Full Metal Panic! Showcase”