Drinks and Dancing (R-ish)

[AngelOfDeath]

Wow, I just finished this and I already feel bad for posting it. I never do this kind of sexual stuff very well. Ugh. Be nice! At least I'm trying to push my comfort zone, I guess.

In fact, I pose a challenge to all and sundry to write a fic that involves stripping at some point because I think there is a lot fo humor to exploit there and because I think someone more comfortable in general can do this much better than I.

Disclaimer: I no own. Oh well.






Relena felt her eyes bug. The panic attack was just starting and she was doing her best to stifle it. As Duo vaulted the couch and Wufei tried to wake up Quatre, Trowa stowed the majority of Relena?s clothes under the couch. She didn?t know what to do. This was worse than anything she could have imagined. For one thing she was practically naked.

Practically. But not quite.

The only modesty she could claim was her lacy white bra and panty set, and her arms which were attempting to cover the same things that the clothes were. Funny how that worked. You?d think she would try to cover what the clothes she had on didn?t cover. Regardless, it was pretty damn obvious that she was naked with four Gundam pilots, many of whose significant others were pounding on the door.

Hilde, as good a friend as she was, would not understand this. Relena wondered if even she understood it.

Rather than sitting down heavily in the chair next to her, she made a decision and ran for the bathroom. Slamming the door, she could have sworn the shower swore, but it was more likely Wufei since Quatre was proving hard to wake up. She had told them it was a bad idea.

*
*

"C?mon princess, we?re all going out. It?s not like we?re all still 15. Let?s relax like adults and get a much deserved drink!" Duo swung an arm over her shoulder and despite her better judgement, Relena found that she did in fact want to have some fun. The conference had not gone as she had anticipated, and now that it was over she could still feel the stress bunch in her belly like an ulcer ready to strike.

Of course she had to protest for appearance sake. "I don?t know Duo, it?s been a long day. . ."

"All the more reason! Everyone?s going." Duo lowered his voice a little as he led her towards the door, arm still weighting down her body just a little. "Even Heero."

"That?s a dirty trick Duo."

"I know." He looked really pleased as she sighed and nodded her assent to the little excursion.

Once at the small bar, Duo immediately recognized and found the group of pilots all in various states of sociability. Quatre waved back, Trowa nodded a greeting; Wufei and Heero ignored them though Relena thought she saw Heero glance over quickly.

At first she was nervous, and a little shocked as well because these ex-pilots could drink like no other people she?d met. But then she supposed there would be a lot they would want to forget. Best to just try to cheer everyone up. Conversation was stilted, but it at least happened.

After a beer, two shots of bacardi, half a bottle of wine, and sips of various other drinks, Relena was VERY happy and VERY obliging to answer any and all questions the Gundam pilots had for her. Wufei, as the designated driver, mentioned something about injustice, but kept to himself and didn't stop the plying of everyone's favorite princess with all sorts of alcohol and his own questions.

Heero, who had had a few, but was mostly in control of himself, was keenly paying attention while pretending not to. Duo, who noted this keen disinterest with an eye to have some fun and drag everyone else along with him, asked Relena what the wildest thing she had ever done was.

Relena thought for a long while.

"I. . . I don't think I've EVER done anything wildish. Is wildish a word?" Her unfocused question led to a petulant look and a giggle. "My clothes are so warm. Why do I have to wear wool in summer? It's summer right?"

"What have you always wanted to do then princess?" Duo asked. Heero had been edging closer. Even Trowa seemed to have his eye on her as she thought, tapping one finger to her lip and missing it occasionally.

"I think I want to take off my clothes." Trowa's eye crossed and Quatre spit out his drink with a spray. Duo looked pleased beyond belief.

"A strip tease then?"

"Sure." Relena looked much more drunkenly determined. "That's exactly what I'll do. After we leave here then I'll do a strip tease for all of you! I love you guys. I mean, I REALLY love, er, one of you, but I love you guys." That's about when Heero appeared next to her with a large glass of water.

"Promise me you'll do it princess, please?" Duo asked, a gun cocked behind his head.

"You don't have to promise anything Relena." Heero said in a low tone.

"I want to do something wild before I get old! Don't be such a sourpuss. I promise you, cross my heart, that I will strip for you boys at some point." There she had said it. Now why couldn't she focus in on the clock across from her? After asking about the problem, Trowa lifted her head from facing down at the floor and things looked a little more familiar.

Hours later, she stood in Trowa?s apartment clutching at her clothes and looking so nervous and nauseated that you?d think she had a hangover. Well, she did have a little ache in her head, but largely she was fine in the direct physical sense. Now, after much water and even more regrets, she had to come through on her promise.

"N-now how do I do this?" She wanted to shake herself for the stumble in her voice. Duo gave her a compassionate glance.

"Listen, you don?t have to-"

"I said I would and I come through on my promises, Mr. Maxwell!" Her outburst gave her a false boost of confidence. She felt her dry thick tongue in her mouth that tasted sour from the alcohol earlier. "Maybe, er, some music would help?"

Trowa got up from his spot in between Duo and Quatre on the couch and wandered over to his stereo. Meanwhile, Wufei got a chair from somewhere and took a seat to the side of the couch. Heero had, for some reason, disappeared during the exodus from the bar. So far as the rest of them were concerned, it was his loss, but then who knows what he might do if he was watching them watching Relena.

Music, fast and fit for dancing to started up. It didn?t seem right. Relena caught his eye and shook her head. His living room was no runway, and she wanted to be a little classier than that music implied. Trowa turned back and looked for something else.

"I think I maybe should be going, I mean, Dorothy might be. . ." Quatre stood up and looked uncertain.

"They all expect us home tomorrow afternoon and you know it." Duo laughed at the sensitive young man as he blushed.

"Be a man, Winner." Wufei leveled a glare at the blond man until he sat down again.

The music started up again, slow and languorous. Why did Trowa own this sort of music? It was the sort of thing you?d, well, have sex to. Trowa smiled in a knowing manner at the question in Relena?s eyes. There were many things she didn?t know about him, just like she didn?t know about Heero. She cursed in her mind. Why didn?t Heero want to be here? Was he trying to be respectful, or did he just not like her like that?

Four pairs of eyes caught her own and she was launched out of her head into the present with a psychic jolt. For a moment she held still, trying to find equilibrium. Maybe if she just thought of this like she thought about making speeches. Politics was like acting and for this she just needed to play a part. Tonight she would play the part of the sultry exotic dancer. With a gulp, she jumped in head first to the concept.

A flicker of her eyelids was all they saw for a few tense seconds, and then Relena began to sway. Eyes closed at first, she dipped and unbuttoned her suit jacket. First opening one side and then the other in turn eventually she turned around and dropped it onto the floor immediately following it with a little glance round her shoulder while she unbuttoned and undid the clasps on her pants.

She had fallen into the role so quickly, the boys still had whiplash. Wufei seemed to have become stunned and Quatre was trying to turn his cheeks into tomatoes. A rush of confidence hit her. She could pull this off!

Turning back around she moved like a snake back and forth before them, sliding down her pants and stepping out of them with only a little bit of difficulty as her shoes were still on. She kicked the pants forward to join the jacket and give her more space with which to work.

Sticking one finger in her mouth and still swaying while bending her legs a little for maximum range on the flicks of her hips, she thought she heard Duo actually whimper. Trowa, she saw, swallowed hard and crossed his legs. Quatre?s tomatoes were going to go rotten if they got any redder. Wufei still looked stunned.

The finger came out of her mouth and traced down to start undoing buttons on the shirt, from the bottom up. Stopping with the top button to go, she kicked off her shoes instead. Someone growled a protest, but she just gave a sneering smile and licked her lips, turning once again so they were staring at her back and legs. Glad for once for her personal trainer insisting on flexibility exercises, she rolled down one white knee high stocking and then the other without bending her legs.

Tossing her hair up and back in a messy golden cascade she turned around and got a fun idea. Walking over to Wufei, who seemed to have reached statue-like status she poked him in the chest with one foot until he toppled over onto the floor. Sitting down a moment she lifted one leg straight into the air and removed the first stocking before performing a similar move to its twin. Picking up the chair, she walked back over to her stage as Wufei picked himself up and perched on the armrest of the couch. Almost ripping off the last button in the violence of her movement, Relena tossed the shirt aside.

Here Relena hesitated. Stripping down to her underwear was one thing, it was like wearing a bikini after all, but being naked was far different. Uncertainty clouded the heady feeling of adrenaline that before had possessed her like a demon. Stall for time, the last sensible brain cell screamed, STALL!

Well, there was a chair. She prayed that something better would occur to her and straddled it.

Duo seemed to start choking on nothing. Trowa crossed his legs the other way and patted Duo on the back without actually taking his eyes from Relena. Quatre was apparently turning rather more beet colored and she wondered if he was breathing. Wufei?s mouth had dropped open and he didn?t seem to notice. All of their eyes burned with some peculiar light that made her feel as if she were already naked. Keeping this up was getting more difficult without breaking character.

She did anything she could think of that didn?t involve removing the last of her clothes. She tossed her head about and ran her hands over her body in a way she hoped was sensual. If she didn?t know better she could have sworn Trowa was panting? Standing up, putting one leg on the chair, she rocked back and forth while her mind frantically sought what to do next. Maybe it was time to stop this little display.

Pounding on the door startled all of them. Duo leapt up, glanced down, sat almost as quickly, and swore. Relena, who had certainly not missed the cause of his alarm, reddened delicately all over her body.

"I heard that Duo Maxwell and you had better open this door before I break it down!" That was Hilde. Oh god no.

"Better move quickly, or things are liable to get. . . unpleasant." Dorothy. Quatre fell over in what Relena could only think of as a swoon.

"And don?t think we won?t beat you within an inch of your life, because there is no way I?d let you die just to get out of it!" Now that was most definitely Sally. For once, Wufei found it impossible to stay impassive.

As the only one in the clear, Trowa smirked. "Better think fast men." He said softly, legs still crossed.

"Little brother, you had better be on the brink of death for me to get a call in the middle of the damn night when I have a show tomorrow!" Trowa?s smirk faded at Catherine?s voice in the hallway. There was more pounding on the door.

"This had Yuy written all over it, and when I find out what he said then I?m going to murder the bastard." Wufei growled as he slapped Quatre?s face in an attempt to wake him up. Relena wondered if he was mad about the women showing up or Relena?s performance ending so prematurely.

Once the tent he was making of his fingers eclipsed the tent in his pants, Duo leapt over the back of the couch rather gracefully even as Trowa snatched up clothes and pushed them under the couch. Relena worried vaguely about her cream colored suit and then decided now was not the time to bring it up. Dashing to the bathroom, she slammed the door just as she heard the other one open and footsteps charging in.

"Now you had better have a good reason for sending me a message like that in the middle of the night, when you are not supposed to be home yet AND very clearly not in any danger whatsoever!" Sally was similarly scolding Wufei and telling him that was no way to wake a person up at the same time. Relena really hoped that they would not come into the bathroom.

It was cold in here, she thought. The window to the left was open and the curtains billowed, as the wind caused bumps to rise on her skin. So very cold. She closed the window as silently as possible. Even so, she felt exposed. Wandering over to the shower, she tried to climb inside, but for some reason the shower curtain was fighting her efforts.

Suspicions and conclusions happened in her brain like lightening and thunder.

"You had better have a damn good reason for all this." She hissed.

Heero drew back the curtain and was careful only to look above her and to the side.

"I was simply protecting you." What she did in response startled him. Her eyes became watery with unshed tears.

"I was stupid to think that maybe it was something else. But then I?ve been stupid about you for a long time." Her sniffles were soft as she didn?t want to land in even more emotional turmoil than she was already in. A hand held some tissue paper in front of her. "Why don?t you think I?m sexy Heero? Can?t even a striptease let you see me like a woman?" She blew her nose a little too loudly.

"What was that?" Dorothy had heard. Relena looked into Heero?s eyes in fear. He pulled her into the small shower space and pulled the curtain around them. The door opened slowly and light filled the room from outside. Relena wondered if the sound of her heart was giving them away, it was beating so fast and loud. It was in that moment that she became aware that Heero, though still looking as stoic as he always did, also had his heart going at a speed almost matching hers. And that something stiff and undeniably belly height was poking into her. Well well, she thought, maybe he?s more human than I thought.

Once the door closed again, Heero?s grip loosened a little, but tightened automatically as Relena purposefully pressed closer.

"What did you think of my dancing? I assume you found a way to watch it too." Her voice was a purr, close to his ear.

"Stop Relena. Stop while you can." He had the same look the other guys had right before the notorious interruption, only from him it made her feel so warm and tense that she couldn?t have stopped if she wanted to. A hand of hers moved under his shirt to feel his chest. Muscles flexed at her touch, jumping in a way that made her feel powerful and confident again, despite being nearly naked.

"Do you want me to stop?" She halted the path her hand was taking and poised herself for leaving the small shower space.

The pause lasted far too long, but she was rewarded for her patience. "No." And with that simple answer a whole range of barriers fell and his mouth met hers in a kiss that was almost vicious. Hands already at her back, made quick work of her bra, and once removed, one hand cupped her breast as he leaned down to taste the other one. Relena couldn?t stifle the groans now. The hardness near her belly seemed to be all the more firm and one hand dropped from his chest down to confirm this. In response Heero almost bit down too hard on her nipple.

"Ow." With that little noise he was back up looking her in the eyes, concern and something like self-loathing creeping in to his own expression. "It?s ok." She stroked him through his pants and watched his eyes flutter and close a little in a way that was so indescribably sexy that she decided that everyone else could be damned out there.

Leaping out of the shower, she found a lock on the door and slammed it home with a click, even as Heero swept through the medicine cabinet until he found what he sought and tore at the wrapper urgently.

"Wait." Relena undid his pants and knelt down in front of him. She wanted to be in control for as long as possible, and Heero merely looked down at her in something like shock mixed with a lot of lust. Halting her before she could begin the activity she planned, he stood her before him and made sure to get her attention.

"I love you." He said, in a serious manner, as if to clear the air of some important and obscure question. Relena gave him a little half smile, tilting her head to the side.

"Thank you." She didn?t need to tell him. She?d been telling him indirectly for years.

*
*

"What was that?" More crashes from the bathroom alerted the company to something going on. The Gundam pilots all figured it out fairly quickly and shared knowing (and in some cases embarrassed) glances. Dorothy tried the door, finding it wouldn?t open.

A feminine cry echoed out, and everyone became very still.

Catherine pulled out a white nylon knee high stocking from beneath the couch from where it was peaking. Duo cleared his throat and Quatre did his impression of a beet again.

"What was going on here?"

"Er. . . Relena. . ." Quatre began as Duo elbowed him sharply.

". . . and Heero need some time and I suggest we give them some privacy. Just got here ourselves in fact. That?s what we?ve been saying all along." Duo looked at Trowa.

"I think perhaps we should leave." Trowa was all for escape rather than continuing being subjected to the moans that were increasing in volume and frequency even as they stood there.

"Hm. Yes." Hilde led the girls out first, Dorothy lagging behind supporting Quatre and Duo next to Hilde continuing to give excuses.

Wufei watched Trowa lock the apartment. "You sure? Yuy doesn?t have a key and we won?t be back for a while."

"Somehow I don?t think that will be an issue."

[Beck]

OMG! Relena sure is a brave girl to strip in front of the guys, but the reactions they all displayed were priceless, a gut buster for sure!

Knew there was a way to get Heero to snap out of it, Go Rellie!

Very cute fic, I always have a few strip type fics running in my head but I'm afraid they might never see the light of day. My brain doesn't function as well as it use to.

[Faye Faye]

Cute story! I was scared Shitless at the thought of Relena getting caught stripping for any pilots other than Heero.

But of course, it all worked out in the end and WOW...to be taken in the bathroom but not in the shower...how erotic. You had it covered girl! Great Story

[Kari]

Man I loved it. Especially with Catherine saying : Little Brother ..
and Trowa's response. Not safe now anymore.
Ever thought about making a sequel.
'Cause if you make one i'll be certain to read and review it.
Kari

[Nikouru]

Great story! Duo made a great save with that excuse... if the girls found out about Relena giving the guys a strip tease, all hell would break loose. Well, can't wait to see what you come up with next!

[Elyn Yuy]

:-? I did these expressions all at once because of this fic!

Great job. Keep up on your writing.

Elyn Yuy

[bookworm]

It was GREAT!!! I knew that Heero would do something. This is BI, of course. But the four Gundam pilots' expressions were simply hilarious. I was laughing over it.
A great sequel idea (if you are going to make one) is Heero doing a striptease for Relena. I can't picture Heero doing one for the girls, since there are definitely strong Gundam pilots who'll get revenge for that. But Heero stripteasing for Relena...ah, the possibilities.

[AngelOfDeath]

Ohoho. Heero stripping for Relena? ::cackles evilly:: I just might have to write that. I have a few days left of vacation and all, and it seems like a challenging prospect to set it up and everything.

Yes! I will try!

[War Dove]

heehee. Cute very cute. I liked this one a whole lot. Very Very good.

[lilac310]

YIHAA!!!!....it was totally fun reading this....keep it comin'!!!!....a sequel would be nice.....