Warning: NC-17. Sex, this chapter very uh...disturbing.
Rape, angst and a crazy madman
Quatre who's sex crazed.
The Violet Burning
Part Three
*****
I felt the rawness of my state of being. Quatre?s hot breath tickled down my neck. The sensation caused me to close my eyes. His hands on my skin made my heart beat faster in fear. Why couldn?t he see I didn?t want this? Quatre didn?t mind my slight protest when I tried to pull away but instead he smiled as he pulled me back into his form hard.
He had come home early for work. Unfortunately for me, I was getting out of the shower and had nothing on but a towel. The moment I saw him I saw he was slightly crazed. He looked mad. He was cursing when I noticed he had a bottle in his hand. I felt my throat go dry. Quatre wasn?t a nice drunk.
When he saw me standing in the hall, the anger, the alcohol and desire surfaced. He grabbed me, pulled me with him to the couch, and so here I was. His hand trailed up the end of the towel but I merely pushed his hand away.
?Quatre you?ve had too much to drink.? I pointed out the obvious.
?Ah but Miss Relena, it helps burn out the memory of my day.? His words were slurred to a dangerous degree. Perhaps he had more intake than I thought.
?Do you want to talk about your day??
His answer was muted as he talked into my neck but it was clear enough that he didn?t want to. I didn?t have time for an afternoon fling on the couch. I had plans to go to Heero?s place and bring him soup
?You smell so good.? I winced as his hand found its place on my inner thigh. His hand felt cold against my hot thigh. ?So soft.?
?Quatre I have somewhere I need to be.?
He didn?t listen. ?Are you going to take off that towel or am I going to have to??
I felt anger and panic surface and tilt in my brain.
?No, Quatre, listen to me, I need to be somewhere. We can do this later.? I?m sure we would. Quatre pulled back with a mad look. He slapped me before he straddled my hips.
?You are my wife. Therefore you need to give in to my needs.?
I started to cry, I couldn?t help it. ?What about my needs??
His hands were bruising.
?Aren?t you going to get it? No one cares about your needs Relena. No one loves you but me.?
I didn?t have time to think before he pulled me and started to push me towards the bedroom. I couldn?t stand the thought of him touching me intimate again so I struggled more than I usually did. It only resulted with him pulling me down to the floor in the hallway.
?Please Quatre, let me go.?
?No.?
His hand cupped my breast harder than I appreciated. His nails dug in to my skin and I could feel the sting. His hand raped my skin. I closed my eyes and tried to think of anything else but Quatre?s lips were drugging my mind. I could feel myself being detached completely from the towel but I was to the point where I didn?t really care.
When I finally opened them again I could see blood surfacing where his nail marks were. I wanted to protest, scream, anything but lips took mine in a struggle. I felt him enter me from behind. I put my hand on the wall to steady myself. I wanted to pray but couldn?t create any thoughts with him pushing in and out of me. His hands dug into my hips as he created a rhythm. The wall was pressed up to my front, and the burn of the carpet was agonizing.
I bit back tears and wondered what it would feel like to make love.
?Oh God Relena.?
He spilled into me and I absently wondered if I would get pregnant. He would beat me then, claim it was my fault. Mostly likely he?d make me get an abortion. His breathing was heavy, his touch became gentle.
?I?m sorry if I hurt you.?
How could he say that? I felt cold tears again my flushed cheeks. His kisses were soft, his hands soothing. I felt the towel being pulled around me once again. He got up, ran a hand through his hair.
I wanted to see guilt, grief, anything. Instead I saw a fully satisfied man.
?I need to go back to the office.?
I used the walls to help me up, trying to hold the towel as best I could. My head pounded, my body felt robbed. I didn?t pay him any attention but instead made my way to get back into the shower.
*****
?Something happened.?
I glanced up at Heero who sat with a mug of soup between his hands next to his lips. He looked paler from the day before and his eyes were darker that I had seen before. His look was heavy and I felt my heart ache for his internal pain. I ignored his comment and decided clean up a little around his apartment. It wasn?t too bad- I just needed something to distract myself.
?Are you feeling better?? I felt the need for light talk. He realized to drop the topic and shrugged. I held back a laugh as he winced when he took a sip of the bitter brew.
?What is this??
?I don?t know.? I responded offhand while filling the kitchen sink up with warm soapy water. ?Wufie bought me it when I was having stomach problems. He said it helps with just everything. Trust me, its heaven in a liquid form.?
?Stomach pains? You mean when you had ulcers.?
That brought back memories. It was right after Quatre and I got married. Everyone blamed the ulcer and acid reflex from stress that they assumed came from work. However I just beginning to realize the hell I was married into.
I pulled up my sleeves and began to do what God made women to do. Heero stood up, wavered for a moment, and then found his balance. He sat his empty cup down next to the sink and pulled out a drying towel from under the sink to help.
?The point is I?m here to help you get better- take care of you. You should be laying down.? I pointed out, trying to pull some loose strands of hair with my arm considering my hands were full of soap. He didn?t respond but took the liberty to brushing them behind my hair. His touch was so different from Quatre?s controlling fingers. I kept myself from closing my eyes and savoring the moment. Instead I was determined to focus entirely on the dishes but Heero?s closeness made me feel dizzy. His hand encircled my wrist and pulled up my arm from his convenience.
?What happen?? I glanced down at the raw skin. In the shower after Quatre had his way with me in the hall, I felt the need to wash off his touch, his smell. To clean my dirt that seeped through the skin. I remembered crying and scrubbing until blood started to surface.
?I wasn?t paying attention to how hard I was washing myself in the shower.? It wasn?t a lie. He didn?t look convinced. His eyes looked so inviting to share. I wanted to cry, let him comfort me. Tell me Quatre would never touch me again. But knowing Heero I doubted he knew the formula to comfort.
?Something happened Relena.? He grabbed my shoulders and turned me to face him squarely. ?I know you.?
The way he said it made it hard to breathe. I knew he was right- he could see right through me every time.
?I-? Oh God, ?He-?
His eyebrow burrowed together and I could see the concern written clearly. ?He? He who? Relena who hurt you??
?I should go.? I needed to get away. But Heero wouldn?t let go and shook his head no. Something inside me broke and I cried for the loss of my being. Heero looked taken aback. Almost like he didn?t know what to do with me. He had never seen me like this before. I never allowed him to.
I felt him awkwardly pull one arm around my shoulder and pull me into his chest. The hesitation was obvious but I didn?t care. I grabbed on to him and cried. I knew this would cause even more concern and questions but I didn?t care. The man I was in love with would take care of me like he promised before I got married.
?Relena??
I glanced over the former pilot who was leaning against the wall by my window. I sat in bed and pulled the blankets closer to my chest. I knew why he was here. ?I guess you heard.?
He nodded and made his way to the bed. ?Duo told me. Will you be happy??
His concern for my happiness was always an obsession of his. I watched him watch me- a favorite pass time- and nodded slowly. Sure I would be. Quatre was a good man; the marriage would be a good icon and perhaps buy me another term in office. So if it was all so perfect how come I longed not for the blonde?s love but the man sitting next to me?
?Things will be different.? He said slowly. I knew what he meant. This. Him. Me. Our friendship. No one really knew how close we really were. He smiled ironically, almost painfully. ?I don?t think Quatre would appreciate me coming in at night to talk to his wife.?
His wife. I felt moisture forming. ?Nothing will change. I promise. Your still my best friend.?
?He?ll protect you.?
I felt panic. ?No. What do you mean? Heero-?
He shook his head no. ?It?s his job Relena.?
?Stop being silly. It?s your job. You promised me and I swear I will have your head on my wall if you let anything happen to me. Best friends don?t ditch each other because of a little bit of change.?
He sighed, defeated. ?Fine. Mission accepted,, keep my head off your wall.?
I laughed. ?I do believe you just told a joke Mr. Yuy.?
He merely shrugged. ?I need to go.?
He kissed my forehead and I felt my heart break. My lover was leaving and I was being given over to someone else. I knew despite my declaration of nothing would change, this would be our last midnight meeting. But somehow I slept better knowing he would always be there to keep me safe.
?Relena??
I blinked, slowly drifting to the present. I had stopped crying and Heero had a washcloth soaked in something.
?This will hurt.? He slowly dabbed it on my arm but the pain didn?t compared to the wall breaking inside. I couldn?t help but notice how beautiful he looked. I smiled at the irony of him taking care of me when I was here to take care of him.
?Did he,? he paused unsure of himself, ?Are you hurt anywhere else??
?Yes.? I noticed how cold, how dead my voice sounded. I didn?t intend it to be that way. ?I have some cuts on my upper legs.?
His eyes darkened and I could see the anger.
?I know you?ll protest but you need to trust me.?
I knew what he was getting at. He led me to the living room and I undid my skirt revealing the red lines on my hips and inner thighs. I felt uncomfortable, his eyes on my body, but I trusted him. Instead of going straight to work like I expected Heero pulled me into his hard body and ran a hand through my hair. His touch was intoxicating.
He pulled back, aware of himself and gestured towards the couch. I sat down as he sat on the coffee table.
?Is this okay?? He asked, one hand on the outside of my thigh. I nodded and spread my legs to give him enough room. I never noticed the sting, just his gentle touch as he softly rubbed the washcloth over the deep cuts. His eyes were narrowed as he worked and I felt my uneasiness fade.
?When did this happen Relena?? Despite his gentle touch his voice was hard and emotionless.
The words left my mouth before I could comprehend their indications, ?Which time??
His touch stopped and his eyes caught mine.
*****
Thanks everyone who reviewed. My heart is yours.
Uh, sorry to leave this chapter hanging. Wait,
no I'm not.
I think I enjoy making you all wait. Have a wonderful day everyone.
lovies, shev
BTW: don't eat meat. Because of meat eaters
there are no wild cows. Have you ever seen
a wild cow? I've never seen a wild cow.
Think about it.
