Love Me, Love My Dog -- pt. 3/4 -- PG-13
Posted: Tue Apr 22, 2003 10:41 pm
Now is the time for all good stories to turn weird and modern. Remember, people, this is a WORK IN PROGRESS...if it?s completely terrible, please tell me. Be aware of just one thing ? if you hate it because you hate stream-of-consciousness, I really don't think I can change that. I?m stretching my creative wings, etc. I want constructive criticism. I want to know if I?m accomplishing what I mean to do. I want to write this chapter in a less-organized style because a) it?s something I?ve been dying to try and b) I feel it?s a necessary evil to really describe what?s running through Kagome?s head while she ?watches? the video. If you think I?m doing a poor job with the style, please help me ? I?ve never written anything like this before! Thanks!
~♥~
?Kagome? Are you alright, love??
Cold rain. Cold slimy rain. It pokes through her hair slowly ? cold fingers. Cold fingers on her head, cold fingers on her heart.
?Come on, punkin. Let?s getcha home.?
Her Papa is sad. He eyes look tired. He smells of tobacco and mothballs. The mothball smell comes from the museum. They don?t have mothballs there ? it just smells like them. It?s a bad smell. It makes her nose hurt and her eyes water. The animals in the museum look alive, but they aren?t. They stand in glass cages, all alone. She likes the tobacco smell. He smokes a pipe. He?s not allowed to smoke in the museum. You aren?t allowed to touch things in the museum. You aren?t allowed to yell or run around, either.
You aren?t allowed to have a dog for a best friend, either. Yukari laughed through her nose ? a high, ugly sound. Yukari?s best friend is Keiko. Keiko goes to school, too. Keiko wears her hair in a thin ponytail. It looks like a rat?s tail. Keiko nibbles like a rat. Her teeth clank when she eats. But she isn?t a rat. Youkai is a dog. He doesn?t laugh through his nose. He laughs with his mouth wide, a quiet pant. He swallows his food all at once, and never gets a stomach ache. But he?s not her best friend. That?s wrong.
?Look who?s here, Kagome! I couldn?t keep him at home, he was so eager to see you.?
He yips at her expectantly, eagerly. He never understands school. He wants her to be home with him all the time. He wants to play all day long. He doesn?t understand responsibility. That?s a word she learned at school. It means doing what you?re supposed to do, even when it?s not what you want to do. She?s supposed to have a best friend. She doesn?t have a best friend. She doesn?t play with the other girls. The teacher called her anti-social. This means that she eats by herself at lunch. This means that the other girls laugh at her. It?s all his fault, really. If it weren?t for him, Keiko and Yukari would play dolls with her. Keiko threw her doll in the dirt. She said it looked more like a dog toy that way. She said that girls who play with dogs should play with dog toys. She said that stupid stinky girls who smell like dogs should play in the dirt. Stupid dog girls can?t be princesses. Stupid dog girls can?t play dolls. They call her Dog Girl. They throw her doll and tell her to ?fetch.?
?I HATE YOU!?
He whimpers, tilting his head, confused. She?s never yelled at him before. She likes it. It hurts, but it?s different from being called a Dog Girl. It burns and builds and thrashes against the walls of her body, the back of her throat. ?I HATE YOU!? she screams.
?Kagome? Hush, Kagome, it won?t help...you?re hurting him, don?t you see?? don?t see don?t see don?t wanna see just leave me ALONE hurt cold ice fingers burning hate you hate you hate you
Warm fingers on her cheeks: tears. Her nose turns gooey and her throat stings. She hates crying. Crying makes your nose stuff up and your face sticky. Soft fur on her cheeks: Youkai. His warm tongue laps at her tears. She loves Youkai. Youkai is soft and warm and will let you cuddle him if you need it. Youkai is her best friend. But it?s wrong. She pushes him back. He whines. He always whines when he thinks he?s done something wrong. He stole a fish her grandpa sent ? not an icky magic fish, but a yummy fish. Youkai scared away the postman. He ate the whole fish before anyone knew. Mama got mad, and Youkai hid under a table. He whined, but Mama still yelled. She tried to tell Mama that Youkai was just hungry. Papa laughed. Papa always laughs when Mama gets mad. When Papa gets mad, no one laughs.
?I know the girls at school have been mean to you. I?ve been thinking about it for a while, and I thought...would you like to change schools??
Change schools? Go away from Keiko with her rattail hair and Yukari with her ugly laugh?
?It wouldn?t be easy in the middle of a school year, I know, but it would give you a chance at a new start, and...?
White fur jumps in front of her. The car screams. Everything stops but the car?s scream and Youkai?s heartbeat against her body ? th-thump, th-thump, th-thump.
loud scream th-thump angry sharp th-thump cold hard th-thump scared scream th-thump wet fingers th-thump pain fur scream fingers drip drip drip
silence
~♥~
*stares out into the void* Well? Good? Bad? Ugly?
The final bit will come...when I write it U.U which I haven?t done yet. I wanted to finish this before posting it, but I?ve realized that I need feedback on this chapter before I go on to the final third. Please help!
~♥~
?Kagome? Are you alright, love??
Cold rain. Cold slimy rain. It pokes through her hair slowly ? cold fingers. Cold fingers on her head, cold fingers on her heart.
?Come on, punkin. Let?s getcha home.?
Her Papa is sad. He eyes look tired. He smells of tobacco and mothballs. The mothball smell comes from the museum. They don?t have mothballs there ? it just smells like them. It?s a bad smell. It makes her nose hurt and her eyes water. The animals in the museum look alive, but they aren?t. They stand in glass cages, all alone. She likes the tobacco smell. He smokes a pipe. He?s not allowed to smoke in the museum. You aren?t allowed to touch things in the museum. You aren?t allowed to yell or run around, either.
You aren?t allowed to have a dog for a best friend, either. Yukari laughed through her nose ? a high, ugly sound. Yukari?s best friend is Keiko. Keiko goes to school, too. Keiko wears her hair in a thin ponytail. It looks like a rat?s tail. Keiko nibbles like a rat. Her teeth clank when she eats. But she isn?t a rat. Youkai is a dog. He doesn?t laugh through his nose. He laughs with his mouth wide, a quiet pant. He swallows his food all at once, and never gets a stomach ache. But he?s not her best friend. That?s wrong.
?Look who?s here, Kagome! I couldn?t keep him at home, he was so eager to see you.?
He yips at her expectantly, eagerly. He never understands school. He wants her to be home with him all the time. He wants to play all day long. He doesn?t understand responsibility. That?s a word she learned at school. It means doing what you?re supposed to do, even when it?s not what you want to do. She?s supposed to have a best friend. She doesn?t have a best friend. She doesn?t play with the other girls. The teacher called her anti-social. This means that she eats by herself at lunch. This means that the other girls laugh at her. It?s all his fault, really. If it weren?t for him, Keiko and Yukari would play dolls with her. Keiko threw her doll in the dirt. She said it looked more like a dog toy that way. She said that girls who play with dogs should play with dog toys. She said that stupid stinky girls who smell like dogs should play in the dirt. Stupid dog girls can?t be princesses. Stupid dog girls can?t play dolls. They call her Dog Girl. They throw her doll and tell her to ?fetch.?
?I HATE YOU!?
He whimpers, tilting his head, confused. She?s never yelled at him before. She likes it. It hurts, but it?s different from being called a Dog Girl. It burns and builds and thrashes against the walls of her body, the back of her throat. ?I HATE YOU!? she screams.
?Kagome? Hush, Kagome, it won?t help...you?re hurting him, don?t you see?? don?t see don?t see don?t wanna see just leave me ALONE hurt cold ice fingers burning hate you hate you hate you
Warm fingers on her cheeks: tears. Her nose turns gooey and her throat stings. She hates crying. Crying makes your nose stuff up and your face sticky. Soft fur on her cheeks: Youkai. His warm tongue laps at her tears. She loves Youkai. Youkai is soft and warm and will let you cuddle him if you need it. Youkai is her best friend. But it?s wrong. She pushes him back. He whines. He always whines when he thinks he?s done something wrong. He stole a fish her grandpa sent ? not an icky magic fish, but a yummy fish. Youkai scared away the postman. He ate the whole fish before anyone knew. Mama got mad, and Youkai hid under a table. He whined, but Mama still yelled. She tried to tell Mama that Youkai was just hungry. Papa laughed. Papa always laughs when Mama gets mad. When Papa gets mad, no one laughs.
?I know the girls at school have been mean to you. I?ve been thinking about it for a while, and I thought...would you like to change schools??
Change schools? Go away from Keiko with her rattail hair and Yukari with her ugly laugh?
?It wouldn?t be easy in the middle of a school year, I know, but it would give you a chance at a new start, and...?
White fur jumps in front of her. The car screams. Everything stops but the car?s scream and Youkai?s heartbeat against her body ? th-thump, th-thump, th-thump.
loud scream th-thump angry sharp th-thump cold hard th-thump scared scream th-thump wet fingers th-thump pain fur scream fingers drip drip drip
silence
~♥~
*stares out into the void* Well? Good? Bad? Ugly?
The final bit will come...when I write it U.U which I haven?t done yet. I wanted to finish this before posting it, but I?ve realized that I need feedback on this chapter before I go on to the final third. Please help!
When I got to the end of this chapter I first thought that it was the dog that was hit, but then I realised that its probably Kagome's dad and the dog saved her. Very much looking forward to the final chapter of this, please do post again soon 
