Perfection...

[Egg Drop Soup]

‘ Thinking ’
“ Speaking ”
// Song lyrics //
Flash backs or dream sequences
(Interruptions)
*** = Different scene

Description: This is adjacent to my other fic, The Dove. I thought it was a neat idea, because, one has to have a ying for a yang, ya know? Like the Dove, I originally thought this story would be good with other character’s points of views. If any request other chapters to join it, then I might add onto it. Some were made for another chapter of the Dove, so I’m really excited! Yeah! I love getting asked to continue story lines, even if they really were just written or intended to be one shots, it challenges me. Thanks to all who continue to read my stories. I am very grateful to all of you!
Disclaimer: I don’t own Gundam Wing. I do however own the story line and plot.

Perfection…
By Egg Drop Soup


Relena’s thoughts…

Perfect…

Yet, amidst that perfection…darkness claims him, only allowing the faintest hint of light to shine…so very few ever see those traces of illuminating rays…

The Darkness is his ever-present companion and I usually find him amidst the shadows of some lonesome corner. Many times I never catch sight of him, but I don’t have to see him to know he’s there.

Shivers run down my spine and the hairs on the back of my head stand on end...only one person could make me react in such a way…

That is my Heero.

Heero…he is the perfect solider, but what is perfection, really?

The condemnation and fleeting abilities of super human strength…the thoughts and personality all set into one genius state of mind, no one can specifically reach that whole some goal... but in a way…Heero has…



Heero is perfect in the ways of war, for no one can match him in skill or in battle… However, the years of such necessary means have long since past and I am resentful to have them return again so quickly, but even I know that I can not fight the inevitable…but still…for the time being…I want to do all I can to preserve that peace…

To protect him…

War is a truly cruel thing for it changes people. This change is not one of light immortality; it is rather that of the need to survive. The endless merciless killing rendered by rulings made by this dog eat dog world.

All my efforts for peace have been because of that need, to keep Heero from ever resorting to his old tactics…to keep him from fighting again…I have long since decided that that is the only way I could ever live with myself…

To the public, I am seen as many things… I am the one who stepped into the political ring, attracting the attentions of all who saw and heard me. I had shocked them, telling them all they wanted to hear, coaxing their fears, and being able to promise reassuring words of peace and prosperity...I truly am no such person.

I can’t promise anything, all I can do is hope, hope that my words will touch the hearts of those who listen attentively to that which rapidly rolls off my tongue… and they do.

They blindly cast their cares and worries at me, and I am constantly flattered by their certainty in all of my actions. Which is why…I could never betray or render that trust.

Vice Foreign Minister…Dove of Peace…Former Queen of the World…

The world is a glass ball that I hold securely in my hands, and I must be ever cautious and careful with this load I bare…for if I should slip or in my footing misstep, the orb will fall…and precious glass is not the only thing that will break….

They think me invincible! Able to stand amidst anything…no one is truly that strong, but still, I play along, silently hoping that they’ll understand...that I, like them, am trying to seek a real purpose in life.

This is why I must choose my decisions carefully, I must keep up the strong fa?ade and not let them see the insecurities, which plague me. I often think myself quite lucky to have been quickly introduced into learning the tricks and trades that one often finds in the political world.

I have a mask of my own now, and it’s often referred to as Relena Dorlain...

I’m sure that Heero thinks that way too.

He’s trying, like I am, to preserve what little peace we have, for as long as we are able. Knowing this, that I’m not alone or the fact that my efforts aren’t merely in vain, it makes my heart soar and I feel like I can move the sun and moon together, all for the sake of trying.

Heero…

I remember the day I first found him, laying upon the damp beach sand...

He had run from me, he’s always running, and I was so startled by his abrupt actions that I held out my hand and rambled on as if he were still there.

“My name is Relena…what’s yours?”

Little did I know, that we would later be reacquainted when he later made his presence known at St Gabriel’s. I was fairly curious about this boy, what was he? More importantly, who was he?

I could tell he had many secrets, and as sure as I was alive, I would find out…

The night of the school dance was one that I greeted happily. Though my dress was ruined, I still attended, clad in my school uniform. I had no need to dress handsomely in order to enjoy myself. But I felt a fleeting sorrow of not being able to wear my beautiful gown, for I had longed to waltz upon the dance floor, with its trailing fabric clinging in its great aqua waves, flowing freely with my movements.

I could tell many of my peers were worried about me for the loss of my father, but I easily reassured them with the strained smile that played idly on my lips.

The usual academic atmosphere was full of gaiety and much well greeted excitement.

It had seemed that all trace of Heero had left the school, and it was only by mere chance that I had overheard of his transferring. I made haste to find him, I still wanted answers, and that old haunting habit, even to this day, has often caused me trouble.

I opened the door to his room, quickly. He spun on his heels, meeting me with his fierce wild eyes.

“Are you going to fight again, Heero?”

He was silent on hearing my words…Heh…I guess I startled him, which was odd… he usually did the startling…

He gun was raised, aimed steadily toward my brow, still my gaze never faltered.

I smiled, and his reaction to that alone gave me courage. It was needless to say that he didn’t expect me to be so bold.

I broke eye contact, taking the ending seams of my skirt in hand, my head bowed slightly, crossing one leg over the other, bending them in curtsy.

On the outside my limbs appeared to move freely, without the slightest trace of tensing muscles, but inside, I was not so strong. I still don’t know what made me hold my ground, it was remarkable how my weak knees had not betrayed me and given way to the weight that unsteadily balanced upon them.

I have no idea why I asked him to dance, I guess overhearing faint notes of music and light conversation had made me breathless in anticipation. Or just maybe…I wanted him to stay…

No sooner was I in his arms, my heart began to beat rapidly, and I could hear it amidst the music that played hauntingly around us, as we twirled and spun in erythematic melody, his hand holding mine ever so securely.

I could feel his faint breathing against the back of my neck, and that alone made my mind swim in blissful ignorance (this one’s dedicated for the site, I had to put that in!) of thoughts and feelings of how sweet the sensation.

The approaching Mobile Suits quickly interrupted our chaste moment. I could easily see that the pilots were arrogant of the power that the suits held, and they abused the use of thier weapons on the shuttering foundations of the school’s walls. I scorned them bitterly, if they wanted to kill me, why come and go on a rampage of destroying the school grounds, or terrifying the other students.

It was me they were after, not them!

I felt a pang in my chest on the things that flashed before my eyes. Screaming and confusion mobbed all the bystanders and they ran madly for their lives. I dodged the buildings and fleeting forms of people, trying to make my way toward the Mobile Suits, with the notion to put an end to the chaos they started.

The events of that night were fairly dissipated and it was fairly unnerving as fear clung to me as I ran. The ground was unsteady with each crashing building and rumbling tremors caused by the advancing Mobile Suits; still I forced my legs onward.

A stray shot had been fired and it hit on impact into the far south end of the school. The fragile foundation gave way to the fatal blow and at first rocked uneasily, but then altogether crumbled, surrendering to those who had provoked it.

The flying debris came towards me, my limbs immobilized by fear and my lips parting to scream, my hands covered my eyes, trying not to greet the horrible fate that awaited me.

In that brief moment of waiting for myself to die and fade away from this world, I had never before in my life…felt such peace…

I felt like I was little again, seeking solace in my mother’s arms. Visions and images passed through my head, and all I saw were the past…not the future… I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to fade away into nothing.

Too much was left undone, I still had yet to discover that boy’s secrets. The one who intrigued me so…the one who was washed ashore and looked at me with those panged filled eyes.

Somehow…the deathblow never came, nether did the cold numbness overtake my body. I uncovered my eyes and found myself knocked off my feet, amongst the rubble of concrete and other remains of what used to be the school. My hair whipped around me wildly from the forceful gusts of wind.

I let my shaky and unnerved hands wander over each and every aspect of my flesh. I was…safe…alive and well…

My mind was racing wildly with a need to know how I even survived! I looked up and saw the figure of his Gundam, kneeling over me, his shield holding up clumps of concrete and stone.

He had saved me.

“Heero…” The words slipped involuntarily from my mouth, but silence was the only thing that greeted me from the pilot that sat in the Gundam’s cockpit.

That same mobile suit fired a shot at Heero’s Gundam. However, the pilot’s efforts were not well rewarded.

With the mobile suit defeated and its comrades long since haste in retreat, only I, and the pilot that went by the name of Heero Yuy… remained.

He ran from me that night. I was confused, had he not told me he would kill me? Why did he suddenly run? Especially when I had already given him so many opportunities to complete his promise?

Still even amidst that realization, I was compelled to peruse him. And his same reaction would always follow…

We met again, many times, mostly by chance and they were often short reunions, but reunions nonetheless. I still proudly carried my stubborn streak, in which to this day Heero insists that I still have, and I would continuously tell him, almost to the point of mock begging, to kill me.

At that time, I had often welcomed the idea of death. Death alone didn’t scare me; it was only the fact that Heero might die or get hurt that did.

No matter how far or wide we were apart I would always think of him dearly. My lips occasionally whispering, or in some occasions yelling, my way of reminding him of his promise, and call it feminine intuition, but whatever the case, I always knew he would hear me. No matter where or when or what was happening to him, and that thought alone gave me reassurance.

I said such peculiar things; but that was the only way I could perhaps guarantee his return to me. I know that sometimes he would run from me so that I would be safe, but I didn’t care, as long as I was with him I was safe, I was happy.

He had long since changed his purpose of all his missions during the cold wars, and protecting me has been his mission ever since. He has always told me that I’m reckless and gives me his usual unapproved looks, but he has never altogether glared at me. I know I must be a burden to him.

I always run in headfirst and never think the situation through, and the outcome to this is many times the same… I’ll end up waiting, locked up in some evil organization’s headquarters and Heero will eventually come and bail me out. Along with his usual antics of finding the hardest and most challenging way to actually save me.

I often wish I could be as strong as Heero, but that’ll never happen, I can’t turn into a trained Gundam Pilot over night…. but I can do something for Heero, the one and only thing that might truly help him…

Love him.

Holding him, letting him release all his fears and doubts, and cradling them on my shoulders along with the weight of the world is a small price, so long as he can be free from the past that still binds him to it.

Whatever trials await us in the future…I know that I can face them. So long as he’s by my side, I can truly face anything…


***Things Never Truly End***

AN: So??? How do you like? Personally, I think that the Dove, was more poetic, but…I don’t think I’m the best person to be judging my own work…I’m the author, so I usually get skeptical on almost everything concerning my stories. I remember when I first posted The Dove, and Let Love Grow-my best works, I wasn’t so sure how people would react, but they seemed to like it. And, I know that there are maybe a zillion errors altogether in this fic, but I don’t care. The imperfections actually make my fic what it is, and I want it to be unique, spelling, grammar errors, and all! So…I’m sorry for all the people who hate bad grammar, I know its frustrating but please bare with me. I really do need a beta reader bad. But I couldn’t force someone to do my editing. I know people are as short on time as I am.

I’m still hiding in my corner, since, as it seems other forums are scary now. BLAH! >_<
I was distraught yesterday, but then I sat and thought about it, and decided that this only motivated me to do more. I mean, not everyone has to agree with you, and you don’t have to necessarily agree with everyone either. My opinions of other authors did change that day though…and I’m not so sure I really liked that. I don’t like disliking people, but then again, I ended up respecting other authors more too…so it’s a rather mixed feeling...

Anyway, if you have the time, please read and review.

Love,
Egg Drop Soup

[Lady Casper]

I love your work Egg Drop
and this goes straight up to my favs lol

Grammar mistakes make it not perfect and their is no such thing as perfect so i say go for it Egg Drop. Grammar probs or not this fic is still excellent...at least to me it is.

[Raspberry]

This was BEAUTIFUL.

True.

Pure.

Honest.

Great fic! It really shows us what Relena thinks, and it's hard to write such fics. As Casper said, excellent job!

And I want you to know that I really like your work

[Egg Drop Soup]

Thank you. y'all made my day. I've been locked up in a house all day without power, seriously! That hurricane came up all the way to the outskirts of where I live, in Mississippi, and I was feeling oh so depressed. Not having school, sucks without tv and sugar cereal. The only thing I had was the phone, and talking with friends gets boring once you've talked about everything you could think about.

You guys are brillant writers and your styles and talents are truly skills to be admired, I am very honored to get a review from both of you!

Love,
Egg Drop Soup

[AnShino]

Aw...I loved it very much so. It really gives us a peek inside Rellie's head and it was written so nicely. Flowed nicely and everything

[Egg Drop Soup]

Thank you, I tried...I'm not so sure I really liked the title though...its hard to come up with good ones that catch others interest.

[simmer]

Hello Egg Drop!
I haven't read Dove yet, but rest assured that I will - this one was super! I love reading such well-worded and thoughtful pieces, and I really like that you have taken the episodes to a much more personal level. I wish I could be in the character's heads, too...

I had no power yesterday either! And I found myself missing BI over most other electrical things, like the microwave and lights. The day was slightly redeemed because I could carry a candle around, though *sigh*

And please don't be scared of other forums. I must admit, it really is daunting to post about such a popular issue! I felt bad after what I put down in that post. EEK so many people who are so much more articulate than I am. It is scary. You just shouldn't be scared. You can definitely hold your own in this writing world!

Great fic, and I'm looking forward to reading Dove!
Have a marvelous, relaxing, sunny day.
~simmer

[lilac310]

Great...You definitely captured what's in Relena's head as it relates to the episodes in Gundam W....Keep up the good work!

[Egg Drop Soup]

Thank you! I'm almost done with my 2nd chapter of the Dove, so when I post it, I'll post the first one.

Yeah, that hurricane sucked. My car was covered in leaves! Its like someone took super glue or something and stuck it everwhere! Today...cleaning up the yard and my poor SUV...wasn't fun... *sniff*


Darn 2 door garages! If only i had a 3 door one...oh well...its shiny and clean now...so about...i dunno...an hour's worth of work paid off! So, I'm happy!

Thank you for posting a reply to my fic. I feel so proud to have such brillant writers themselves compliment me. Thanks again!

Love,
Egg Drop Soup

[Lady Casper]

Ur 16 and have an SUV