I will probably post the lemon either shortly after posting Chapter 11, or at the same time. That way, those who want to read it can read it, and those who don't want to read it can pass over it in favor of the next chapter. ^^
As for the chapter? Aahh, Heero torture. It's so much fun! XD
Okay. Enough treacle.
Two Princes
A pseudo-songfic, loosely based upon the song "Two Princes" by the Spin Doctors
by Sara
Pairings: 1 or 2 xR...so what happens when rivals stop being polite, and start getting real? *grins*
Chapter 10
Duo caught the vidphone on its second ring, leaping over Hilde to get to the phone first. Hilde giggled. She knew that Duo was expecting Relena to call.
It was indeed Relena, and the young woman wore a pensive expression. "Duo, what are your plans two weeks from this Thursday?" she asked after exchanging pleasantries.
"Hmm. Well, other than having my toenails buffed and the houseplants potty-trained...oh, nothing," he quipped.
Relena mock-scowled at him. "Be serious," she chided. "I have to attend a conference in Brussels, and I thought you might like to attend."
Duo's face reflected his skepticism. "A conference?"
"It's a very brief conference. The meeting sessions only stretch across two days, but I'll be there through Sunday night, so I'm taking the opportunity to get a quick vacation, as long as I'll be there already."
"And you want me to come along as your boyfriend?"
"Well, that too. I was actually..." She paused for a moment, as if uncertain how to continue. "Actually, I was wanting you to accompany me...as my personal bodyguard. If you would want to, that is."
Duo was stunned. "Wow...you want me to...and I'm the one who's supposed to...wow. Wow!" He grinned enthusiastically. "I'd be honored, Princess!" Then he sobered. "But what about Heero? Why aren't you bringing him along?"
Relena shifted uncomfortably, her fidgeting transmitting very clearly across the phone lines. "I...have my reasons. But I'm definitely not looking forward to telling him he's not coming with me this time."
They were both silent for a moment, lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Duo broke the silence.
"He's gonna have kittens, 'Lena."
. . . .
"WHAT??!!!"
Relena glared at Heero angrily, her arms crossed over her chest. "I really don't see why you're taking this so poorly, Heero. Don't you want a vacation, too? You've not taken a break in all the years you've been head of security!"
Heero scowled at Relena, and slammed his hands palms-down on the desk in front of her. "My own personal comfort is irrelevant. We are talking about continued world peace here. That is far more important than my annual vacation time!"
Relena pointedly chose to ignore him. "Besides, I'm not going alone. Duo's coming with me." She looked up at him out of the corner of her eye, worried for a moment that this revelation would wound his pride. Instead, he fixed her with a calculating glare.
"And you are willing to trust your life with that fool?"
"Heero!" she huffed. "He is not a fool, and I do not appreciate you referring to him in that fashion. He is perfectly capable of looking out for my well-being. In fact, he has a dual interest in the matter, in being that he and I are--" She stopped suddenly, not wanting to reveal too much information. It didn't matter. Heero deduced the rest of the sentence on his own.
He scoffed. "Well, that settles it. A fool in love is even less competent as a bodyguard than a regular fool." Relena just glared at him, her eyes clearly telegraphing her displeasure.
Heero considered his options, and decided to try his hand at a tactic he had seen Relena herself use, usually to great success, from time to time. He gave her his best beseeching look, and tried to straighten the furrow of disgusted anger out of his brow. "But...Relena, I don't understand. Why are you replacing me?" Inwardly, he shuddered.
The tactic worked. Apparently she is not immune to her own tricks, he mused. Her expression softened. "Oh Heero. I'm not replacing you." She stood up from her desk, and turned to stare out of the window. "I just...well, you and I both know that this isn't going to be a very rigorous conference, and I'll have a lot of free time. I figured it would be like a vacation for me, and as such, I figured I'd want to bring my...I'd want to bring Duo, and give you the weekend off. After all, you know how much you hate spending idle time with me during conferences, and love window shopping with me even less."
He grunted slightly. "But Duo is no match for me in the sense of your security." Before she could protest, he barged on. "Look at it from a non-personal perspective, Relena. I have been your personal bodyguard for three years now. I am quite accustomed to protecting you. I have three years' worth of experience guarding you, and knowing who might strike where, and how. I am superior to Duo in that I have more experience protecting you than he does."
Relena pursed her lips together, obviously displeased by his logic, but she also did not challenge it. Heero continued.
"Besides, just because this is a small conference does not lessen the threat of an attempt on your life."
Relena folded her arms across her chest, and stared at him sternly. Heero was impressed. She was definitely learning to cultivate that intimidation look from him, he thought. It would do her good to adopt a stern, intimidating look. Perhaps then people would be less likely to take her for granted.
"I am not rescinding my offer to Duo. He is coming along, whether you like it or not."
Heero took careful note of this, and gave the barest of pauses before charging on bullishly. He threw up his hands at her stubborn expression. "I see you continue to refuse to listen to logic. Regardless, it seems like you're going to insist that the fool be dragged along with you. So, the way I see it, there is only one satisfactory solution to this matter."
"And what is that?" Relena's voice held more than a hint of suspicion.
"I'm coming along, too."
It was Relena's turn to lose her temper. She whirled to face him, expression incredulous. "What?!"
"You heard me. I'm coming along. It is the best resolution to the matter."
"Heero, you are not coming along!" Relena clenched her fists in impotent fury. Heero raised an eyebrow. He knew that he'd won this round.
"Oh? And how do you propose to stop me?"
Relena just fixed him with a glare. If Heero were a weaker man, he might have felt very, very nervous about his decision. Unfortunately for Heero, he had never claimed to be weak.
. . . .
Relena stepped into her suite at the hotel, and strongly resisted the urge to slam the door behind her. The valet had already deposited her luggage on the rack in the bedroom, and she stepped over to the washroom sink, leaning heavily against it and staring at her reflection in the mirror.
The flight to Brussels had been extremely stressful. After boarding the plane, the only way she had found to keep the peace was to sit in between Duo and Heero. When her two bodyguards had not been busy trying to "out-protect" each other, they had been too busy butting heads with each other to notice her. They had been snapping at each other like wounded tigers, and their constant baiting of one another was enough to try the patience of a saint. She began to wonder, not for the first time, if bringing them both along had been a bad idea.
She stepped away from the mirror, kicking off her shoes, strode into the bedroom and flopped down on her bed, staring at the ceiling. Though it chagrined her to admit it, she could sort of expect this type of behavior coming from Duo. Duo was just that sort of person. She knew he was very serious about his role as one of her bodyguards, but he also had a sense of humor, and was always looking for an outlet to expend his boundless energy. Not only that, but she also knew he had made a name for himself, taunting Heero during their war days.
No, Relena had to admit that Duo's behavior was not atypical. Heero's behavior, however, was. Heero had always been able to assume his famous I-am-a-statue facade when taunted, not even allowing his tormentors the satisfaction of seeing him flinch in the slightest. He had put up with insults ranging from his intelligence to his sexual preferences, and had never even deigned to fix the perpetrator with a death glare, much less physically react. It was one of the things that made him an excellent bodyguard.
For whatever reason, however, his stoicism in the face of confrontation did not extend to dealing with Duo Maxwell.
The two of them had been at each others' throats since leaving Relena's estate that morning. What was more surprising to Relena was that Heero had been the instigator in the majority of the situations, and Duo, not to be outdone, was usually quick to the retort. The two of them had been acting like a couple of hormonal teenagers. Which, mused Relena, probably wasn't too far from the truth. After all, they were both still teenagers.
But why were they acting this way? Certainly it couldn't be because of her. She could understand Duo's behavior, but she was baffled by Heero. Every indication had been that he wasn't interested in her. Or was he? It certainly would explain their behavior.
But that was not the issue at hand. The real problem was that they were supposed to be representing peace and understanding, and presenting such a concept to the people at the conference. Instead, they were fighting over a girl like a couple of rams in rut. That would not bode well for her image at the conference, that was for certain.
She glanced past the bedroom door and across the outer room, over toward the door which connected their two suites, then let her head loll back so that she looked up again. "Please, please let them get along with each other this weekend," she prayed to the ceiling. The silent tiles offered her no answers.
. . . .
Duo had flopped down on the sofa in the hotel suite he would be sharing with Heero as soon as he'd gotten there. Instead of glaring at the ceiling, however, he was glaring at his new roommate.
Duo knew he didn't normally have the greatest patience, but he had been trying very hard to make the best of a potentially bad situation, and Heero had not been cooperating. Even the most patient of people eventually lost their temper, and Duo was very close to losing his.
"Wouldn't kill you to at least try to be friendly, would it?" he grumbled in Heero's general direction. "We're supposed to be representing peace and pacifism here, you know!" Heero only grunted in response.
"There is no reason for you to be here," Heero replied gruffly. "I am completely capable of protecting Relena by myself."
"Au contraire, kemosabe. There is a very good reason for me to be here, and that reason and I are an established couple, you know." Duo knew the comment would zing Heero's pride, and it worked. The other young man whirled around to glare at him, fists clenched, but refused to give in to temptation and belt his antagonist's grinning face.
"Nothing is established, as you so eloquently put it. I'm sure Relena will come to her senses soon."
"Why Heero. If I didn't know you so well, I'd say you were jealous, ol' buddy!"
Heero just glared at him.
Duo chuckled. "Lucky I know you so well, huh? Sure those eyes aren't green?"
"Shut up, Duo."
"Nah, I'm just getting warmed up. You wanna explain why you've been so goddamned cheerful all day?"
"I told you. There is no reason for you to be here. You're just going to get in the way."
"No, I'm not. Relena distinctly said 'vacation'. I'd say that means she had some definite leisure plans in mind when she asked me to come along."
"Those plans are irrelevant. She has included me in similar plans in the past."
"Yeah, but you're not nearly as much fun to be around as I am."
Heero gave Duo a dispassionate look. "Fun is irrelevant. I have a job to do."
Duo gave him a wicked smirk. "I'm actually surprised you didn't insist on bringing Hilde along."
Heero looked up sharply. "What did you say?"
Duo feigned innocence. "Oh, I thought it would only be fair. After all, Relena brought me along, didn't she? I'll admit, when it comes to security purposes, you're probably the better man for the job." Heero grunted in surprised assention. At least the fool could understand that.
"Oh, wait a minute there, Heero, ol' buddy. I'm not finished yet. What I was saying is, it's not really fair for her to bring along her boyfriend and leave you in the cold. She should've at least had the decency to let you bring along your girlfriend, right?"
Heero started as if physically struck. "My what?"
Duo grinned. This comment had been of an even greater impact than the last, and he knew he'd hit a tender spot. "Oh, come on. Like it's so hard to see. It's pretty obvious you have a thing for her."
"For who--I do not. I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, I think you do," said Duo, swinging his legs over the side of the sofa. "After all, you two have been spending an awful lot of time with each other, and Hilde sure seems to have a lot to say about you!"
Heero's defenses dropped ever-so-slightly. "She...talks about me?"
Duo's grin widened. "Sure! Isn't that what all girlfriends do? Talk about their boyfriends?"
Heero's face contorted. "We are not a couple, Maxwell."
"Ooh, we've moved on to last names, have we? I feel so honored."
Heero could take no more. "Tell Relena I will be back later," he said sharply, and strode out of the room.
Duo watched the door slam shut behind Heero, and grinned. He tucked his hands behind his head and whistled cheerfully. "Well, that was easier than I thought it would be," he said to himself, stood up, and casually ambled to the door that connected their suite to Relena's. He unlocked his door, and knocked on hers.
"And if Heero asks what I was doing in 'Lena's suite," he said innocently to the empty air as he waited for Relena to answer the door, "I'll just tell him I was delivering his message in person."
. . . .
Relena opened the adjoining door to her bodyguards' suite after a few moments. She was wondering which one of them it was. Secretly, she hoped it was Duo. She really wasn't in the mood to listen to Heero complain.
Duo ambled casually into her suite, and glanced around. He had half-expected Heero to go straight to Relena to rant about her poor decision to bring Duo along. He certainly hadn't minced words on that issue so far during the trip.
Relena looked pleased to see him. "Duo," she said, her voice belying her relief.
Duo pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead. "Hi there, Princess," he murmured. Relena giggled, and leaned against his chest.
"If I had any regrets about bringing you along, they are all gone now," she mumbled against his shirt.
Duo's body tensed. "Regrets?"
Relena sighed and stepped back, rubbing at her neck tiredly. "I wasn't afraid of how you would act, Duo," she admitted. "I was more worried about Heero. He...didn't take the news well that you were coming along on this trip."
"I couldn't tell," said Duo dryly. He looked up, and saw the stricken expression on Relena's face. "Aw, 'Lena," he said softly, "I'm sorry...I've been trying hard to behave, but I'll try harder."
Relena heaved a gusty, shuddering sigh. "I never thought I'd say this," she said, her voice hesitant, "but for once, I wish Heero weren't here. I think this is just too much for him to handle all at once."
Duo moved to stand behind her, and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Back rub?" he offered, and Relena nodded mutely. Duo began to knead at her shoulder muscles with determination. Relena grimaced at first, but soon Duo's efforts began to take effect. The stresses of the day began to slowly melt away under his ministrations.
Relena sighed as her muscles relaxed. Duo guided her into the suite's bedroom and over to the bed, and laid her down on her front. He straddled her body, resting his weight against her upper thighs, and began working on the muscles of her lower back.
If Relena was upset or surprised over his proximity to her, she didn't reveal it. "Mmm...Duo...where did you learn how to do this?"
Duo chuckled. "Just a special skill of mine, I guess."
The room was quiet for a moment. When Duo finally spoke up, his voice was hesitant. "'Lena...about Heero and this weekend..."
Relena sighed, and felt her tenseness returning. "Yes, Duo?"
"Well...I've been trying to hold my tongue, so far," he began. "You know, to maybe prove to a few people that I don't always lose my temper at the drop of a hat. You know, maybe show a few people that I'm more refined than they think I am."
Relena nodded slowly.
"Well..." he continued, "if you want...if you think it'll help...I can start fighting back."
Relena shook her head, pressing her cheek against the bedspread. "I don't think that will help matters much, Duo," she admitted. "I think the approach you've taken so far is the best one, and I'm glad you did. Thank you, Duo."
Duo paused for a moment, then slid his hands up to the middle of her back, running his thumbs along the curve of her spine. "Then maybe...I know that you said you wanted me to be your bodyguard, but maybe I should just stay out of Heero's hair, and let him protect you. I mean, if we're trying to show pacifism at its finest here, we can't really do that if your bodyguards are fighting like cats and dogs the whole time."
Relena propped herself up on her elbows, twisting her torso to look at Duo. "Duo...I..." She shook her head slightly. "I'm impressed," she finished. She twisted her back experimentally. Duo had effectively worked the tenseness out of her muscles. "Did you know you're darned talented with that back-rub routine?" She smirked. "You know, you could've asked me for anything right now."
Duo mimed disgusted anger, snapping his fingers theatrically. "Damn!" he said, his voice tinged with humor. "And here I could've asked for a new Gundam and everything!"
Relena giggled. "You stop that," she said. "I'm serious. I know that there are certain torturers who are graced with the art of massage, and that tactics such as those are often far more effective than any level of pain and suffering."
Duo shrugged. "I have everything I want right here," he said softly, and leaned down to kiss her lips gently.
Relena cupped his cheek with one hand, and returned the kiss with gentle passion. When they parted, Duo cleared his throat and scratched at the back of his head.
"Um...'Lena...I know you asked me to be your bodyguard this weekend, but it seems that position is already filled. So I think it would be best if I step down from that position, and just be your...special guest instead, don't you? Maybe if I was just here as your companion, Heero wouldn't feel so threatened, and would back off a little bit and behave himself. Then we wouldn't have to worry about starting a war at a peace conference, right?"
Relena shifted under him, wiggling until she was on her back, looking up at him. Duo sat back on his heels to allow her free movement until she was settled again. She studied his face for a moment, her own face unreadable. Finally, she spoke.
"I knew they were all wrong about you." She reached up and cupped his face in her hands, pulling him down to her until he was crouched over her, his hands on opposite sides of her face. She slid her arms around his neck, and pulled him down to catch his lips in hers, kissing him.
So wrapped up in each other were they that neither Duo nor Relena heard the soft click and beep that announced someone was opening the door, or notice when Heero strode purposefully into the suite, searching the room for Relena, only to find both of them in the bedroom.
Heero stopped short in the bedroom, blinking rapidly, as if to erase the scene he had stumbled upon. He stood there, completely shocked, finally stammering out a response.
"R-r-relena?"
~*~
TBC
As always, C&C is greatly loved and appreciated. BWAHAHAHAHA! ^^
--Sara
What of a reaction will we get???
