The Breaking Point (6+9)

[Van Schroeder]

The Breaking Point
by Van Schroeder




~ Still feels like our first night together. Feels like the first kiss, it?s getting better baby. No-one can better this. Still holding on, you?re still the one. ~


?I know who you are.?

Today was the third week and he wished he could see her again, like old times when they'd go dancing and have fun. Forget it, things changed and they can't go back to the way they were before.

She had said that.

Noin just sat there on the table musing things over in her befuddled head. Her elbows joints ached to the marrow as they leaned on the table for support and her pale face was perched uncomfortably on the upper palms of her hands, supporting her head as she absently stared at the glass door.

The grass needed to be cut, the visible dew glistening from the lights inside the house. The unexpected torrent of rain brought thunder, lightning and wind with it and when dawn came, left the sky muddled with grey-palette skies and dirty, heavy clouds black as ash. The wind has blown over the garbage cans waiting at the end of the driveway and all the leaves and garden rubbish had spilled onto the dirt beds like an oriental fan.

The grass still needed to be cut.

With her dark hair uncombed and pallid face unwashed, Noin made no attempt to tidy her appearance much less moisten her dry and chapped lips.

She had slammed the door in his face and abandoned him in revenge. Now she started to regret it. But there was something else in the way.

?So, what happens now??

?I?m not sure, what do you think happens now??

He wished that he could moisten those lips of hers, maybe chew a little on that soft upper lip of hers, that always seemed to make her giggle, but then he put the framed picture down on the countertop. Now there was another.

He sat on the stool, holding a cardboard box of cereal in one hand and his empty bowl in the other. Hand poised in mid-air, Milliardo Peacecraft coughed.

That night he didn?t give a second thought about knocking again so he took the elevator and she hadn?t let him in.

?What are you trying with me? When would I have known??

She was numb to the low rumbling of the washing machine as her clothes tumbled and turned in the adjacent room. She counted down the hours until she had to face him again.

There wasn?t enough.


~ First time our eyes met, same feeling I get. Only feels much stronger I wanna love you longer. You still turn the fire on. ~


She stalked over to the fridge and served herself some ice cream, eating the mint pistachio straight from the bucket, her favourite. As Noin dug into the dessert, the spoon became more and more bent without her realization and the frostiness of her substitute breakfast could not quench her flaming emotions.

?I don?t know.?

?What do you mean ?you don?t know?? You can?t just stand in front of me and say that you never saw this coming??

?I didn?t.?


~ So if you?re feeling lonely, don?t. You?re the only one I ever want. I only wanna make it good. So if I love you a little more than I should. ~


They always said it was too good to be true and they were right. It always blew up in your face, not like it hadn?t before, but this time it was different. Maybe it was him, maybe it was her, or maybe it was the both of them. Things were really different now, when she was a teacher and he was the new principal of her school.

He scratched the back of his head and took his work clothes off the hangers. The shoes needed to be buffed up.

He should have told her earlier then maybe things would have been different.


~ Please forgive me. I know not what I do. Please forgive me, I can?t stop loving you. Don?t deny me, this pain I?m going through, please forgive me if I need you like I do. ~


?So, how are things on your end??

?Fine, Miss Noin, we don?t get many problems in our department. Yours??

?The same.?

?That?s good.?

?Yeah.?

?If you don?t object, I have somewhere else to be right now.?

?Can I ask where??

?A lunch date with someone.?

?What?s his name??

?It?s the new administrator for the school, his name is Milliardo Peacecraft. Purely business.?

Milliardo punched the wall in frustration, bowing his head down recalling the time when he saw her enter the restaurant. He remembered the look on her face when Sally Po had introduced them to each other but he already knew; shock, distrust, anger, but most of all disappointment.

Because she knew him as Zechs Marquise.

And they had been seeing each other for 5 months prior.


~ Don?t deny me this pain I?m going through. Please forgive me if I need you like I do. Please believe it every word I say is true. Please forgive me I can?t stop loving you. ~


That night he came to her, hands empty and hooked into his jeans, waiting outside her door. He never stepped inside, she wouldn?t let him, and the entire conversation was held in hurtful whispers. He explained to her the reasons why but she didn?t accept them, it was the trust that had proven his downfall.


~ Still feels like our best times are together, feels like the first touch, still getting closer baby, can?t get close enough, still holding on, still number one. ~


?Who are you?? The anguish in her eyes was too much, he had to look away.

?I?m Milliardo Peacecraft, administrator of the School Board of Education, District #32. I have blue eyes, blonde hair, have European heritage and keep a scar on my hand from the time I touched a live wire as a kid. Anything I missed?? She didn?t laugh. No smile at all. He missed that.

?Then tell me why you pretended to be someone else.?

?It?s the alias I use when I come here to visit??

?Your girlfriend? Mistress? Wife??

?No! My sister, Lucrezia? putting words into my mouth won?t help things.?

?Nothing is going to help! Not now.? Her voice was so strained and so quiet that it would have been better if she hadn?t spoken at all and just shut him out forever, discarding him like a bad memory. But he was her co-worker and boss now, and seeing her again he knew he didn?t want to give her up, not just yet.

?I want to make it up to you.?


~ I remember the smell of your skin, I remember everything. I remember all your moods, I remember you, yeah! I remember the nights, you know I still do. ~


The conversation was it. There was no going back to what they might have had before and no second chances. It was engraved into his memory, embossed in silver and its living remains buried in the hole within his chest.

?I?m not going, just so you know.?

?Why not? You?re the one who?s always coming and going.?

?And you?re the one who has to analyze everything!?

?How can you say that!?

?It?s true, isn?t it? Everything I do, you women have to pick apart!?


~ One thing I?m sure of is the way we make love. One thing I depend on is for us to stay strong. In every word and every breath I?m praying. That?s why I?m saying. ~


He had taken a step forward and lightly placed his hands on her waist, if she had been wearing jeans, it would have been easier to just link his fingers into the belt loops. But since she wasn?t, he had to be content with holding her this way. He sensed her nervousness like a caged animal and saw the guarded look in her eyes. He smiled painfully. One time Noin had said it was his eyes that attracted her to him in the first place.

The stiffness in her facial muscles, the tension in her throat. Her body was cold, too cold, and it reminded him of frosted ice.

He kissed her shoulder; close to the collarbone and lingered a little too long near her neck. She backed away.

Leaning against the wall, he ran both hands through his hair and waited for her to say something. He had it planned out because he had reasonable answers to all the questions and he would prove himself that what they had was more important than some alias. But what he hadn?t expected was that one last kiss and a hug.

There was no goodbye.


~ Please forgive me I know not what I do. Please forgive me I can?t stop loving you. Don?t deny me this pain I?m going through. Please forgive me if I need you like I do. ~


Tuesday morning, something always bad happened on a Tuesday.

They walked out of the teacher?s parking lot and into the school hallways, keeping their silence but not their eyes off each other. When he opened the front doors and allowed her to pass through first, he thought she would shut the doors on him again. They were the first to arrive in the teacher?s lounge, just the two of them in the restrained area.

?How are you?? He sat across from her, each holding their separate mugs of caffeine-saturated coffee.

?I?m doing fine, I guess. How is the music proposal going with the school board?? Three weeks she?s been this way, avoiding the subject.

?I miss you.?

She hadn?t expected that and when she looked up, he felt that all was right again.

?Milliardo??

?Noin, last time we talked you weren?t ready, I was. Are you ready now??

?I?m sorry Milliardo?? she hesitated, ?but I have somewhere else to be.? He got the hint.

?Am I permitted to know where you?re going??

?I?I have to meet someone for lunch.?

Now who?s the one lying?

?What?s his name?? She bit the edge of her lower lip and looked down at the carpet from the corners of her eyes. She whispered,

?Quatre Raberba Winner.?

He died.

?Is he good to you??

?Yes.? But she added in a voice that sounded very much like regret, ?He?s good enough.?


~ Please believe me every word I say is true. Please forgive me, I can?t stop loving you. ~

- - -
Selected lyrics belong to the song: ?Please forgive me? sung by Bryan Adams
Album: So Far So Good (1993)

A thank you to Calla, for helping me with the song and story.

[Isabel]

I'm a horrific reviewer. But I absolutely loved this. I hope you'll continue to write.

[Beck]

Awww....how sad though the slight hint of 4x9 is rare to see (and am a fan of that pairing too). Is this the end or do you ever plan to adding more to it? Either way, very nice and good use of the lyrics as well.

[Raspberry]

This was sad...

I don't like sad endings!

But I truly like this ficcie

It was so... realistic...

Great job, Van!

[pilot03]

Poor Quatre.....he is "good enough." Quatre always seems to play the safe bet in my head. That may play a part in my fic that I have to finish. Great fic. I liked how you incorporated his alias. Perfect!

[Van Schroeder]

Thanks for the reviews everyone, it's nice hearing from all of you. I'm a fan of 4x9 pairings too Beck and I think that Quatre is under-representated in fanfics, het fanfics that is. Sequel? Don't think so but I'll consider it if someone has an idea.

[Mellie]

Wow. This was perfect. The right mix of everything. excellent job!

[Oyuki]

he's just good enough huh? that kinda sucks. but he can't compare to the lightning count! i'm sorry, i love quatre but zechs is just so much hotter. nice fic. really liked it. it was awesome.