Ask Heero (A Real Advice Column)

[Chibi-sitter]

Have you seen The Land Berore Time 1

Yes! I love it! Even got the soundtrack!

I agree with your ratings, besides you are 'Heero' (from GW ) so enough said.

Here's more links;
http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/pooh_dance.htm
http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/ice_cream.htm
this next one is NOT funny -its NOT, if you have a weak heart DO NOT watch. You've been warned.
http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/relax.htm

[Raspberry]

So Heero, Sasu's story today, please?..

Gosh, I'm sick of my older brother! :evil: I'm mad because of him! He blames me for everything, even things I even haven't touch! I wish I could hurt him!!! Anyone knows some methods to punish your 22-year old brother w/o physical contact?..(me don't have any chances - I'm small and don't have strenght) Heero?.. I just hate that idiot! Argh!! :evil: :evil:

[Crazygurl]

Talk about relaxing, Chibi. I fell asleep.

No kidding, people. DON'T LOOK AT IT IF YOU HAVE A WEAK HEART.

Wearing headphones, my brother heard it.

Gosh. That was...

Gah.

Hee-chan, how BUSY were you? Did you use the handcuffs? Or the chains? I heard Relena took a trip to an 'unknown location' and they're still trying to find her, you little sneak!

*honestly hoping that Relena is with you*

EVERYONE, Rasberry has a new case here! *puts on meanie cap* Hurt your brother? Sure. Blackmail is good. And satisfying. *evil grin* And if you want to hurt him PHYSICALLY, then I suppose you could borrow Heero's multi-purpose chains. AND HANG HIM!!!

*grumbles* Evil brother hurting member of BI...

Heero!! You actually watched The Land Before Time!! I used to close my eyes at the part where Littlefoot's mother died way back then.

And then our VCR popped, so I couldn't watch any videos 'nymore.

Wuv you, Hee-chan! (As long as you get Sasu online NOW)

--Crazygurl :razz:

[Raspberry]

I'm not mad anymore, but I still want to hurt my brother. Punish him. Somehow... Well, I don't think I have any blackmail on him... And I told you I'm too weak to hurt him PSYSICALLY... :-? So what else can I do?..


Yeah, Heero! Sasu's story NOW!!!

[Heero]

Well, Raspberry, if you go to the first few pages of this thread, I think it's three or four. I gave Simply Turquoise some tips on this exact subject. It goes on for many more messages, but read until you find something you like.

Now for Sasu...









I was broke, and down on my luck. Lacking any material items, walking through crowded areas. Then in the corner of my eye, I see reflecting glare from a shiney surface. Naturally, the shiney object intises me. And there I see it, a simple katana. Nothing fancy. But it didn't need to be.
I looked at the price tag and found it was just a bit too high for me, then I hear a whisper. "buy me!! Buy Me!!! BUY ME!!!!" I knew I was destined for that great weapon.
The man at the desk took one look at me and knew this weapon and I were meant to be... so I got a %15 discount.
After he packaged it up, I immediatly took it home. I quickly removed it from the package and unsheathed it. It did shine like a star. Then I noticed that the blade was not sterdy, and the blade was dull. And the reflecting light died down as the light hit the words "made in Packistan" No offence to Packistan, but their exports aren't high quality.
But after tweaking it a bit by straightening the sword, and tightening the hilt, the sharpened blade shone once more. I went outside with this object then punctured a branch. Such a quick flawless stab, I knew then and there he would be named Stab. But "Stab" lacked the gusto needed for a feared weapon. So I named him after the japanese word for the same name, "Sasu".
After that, we were unable to be seperated. We went everywhere together... well, at least we would have if people would let us in places. But then one day, something happened that I could not help. I swung him at a tree and dulled the blade. And the devce I used to sharpen the blade was in my old residence. Alas, his dull blade lingers on. His cries were heard all over the town...
He was put away to rest. Sheathed for eternity. But I vowed never to kill. So then I realized Sasu can now be used just to threaten. And threaten it has. It's still quite deadly, but now it awaits me whenever there is danger. Sleeping behind the open door, awaiting it's next attack.




That wasn't very eventful, perhaps I should have made him out to be magical... possibly able to shape shift... or access the ability of time travel. Maybe even slay one thousand demons in one swing.
But you're stuck with what you get, so no winning!

[Chibi-sitter]

OMG Heero!
You tell such lovely stories!
Make another forum "Heero's story corner!"
Swords are nice, I like em -but don't own one

Talk about relaxing, Chibi. I fell asleep.

No kidding, people. DON'T LOOK AT IT IF YOU HAVE A WEAK HEART.

Wearing headphones, my brother heard it.

Gosh. That was...

Gah.

Yes, I forgot to mention, don't wear headphones when viewing that one. Sorry.

[Calla Lily]

No kidding, people. DON'T LOOK AT IT IF YOU HAVE A WEAK HEART.

Holy ****! [jumps out of her skin] Good l*rd, it's 12:34 am and I turned on that d*mn thing and I had the speakers on too.... That was not amusing AT ALL. [goes off to fr*ckin swear and beat th------] Geez, people (referring to the creators of that animation) had enough heart attacks lately? I'm going to bed. Sweet dreams. *derisive snort*

Ahem. :x

- - -

PS. Anyways, that was a very lovely story Heero, it had some fairy-tale qualities to it. I used to own several blades myself, but they were mostly knives and such. Now, my arsenal has been reduced to a stapler, multiple 20 lb texts and white-out. ^^' Have you ever considered writing as a hobby?

~Calla.

[Heero]

I have written a few stories... none of which will ever be seen to the public eye.

Perhaps some day far in the future, I'll write the story in my head.

[Chibi-sitter]

I have written a few stories... none of which will ever be seen to the public eye.

Perhaps some day far in the future, I'll write the story in my head.

Speaking of your head, how is it?
I asked if you got a cat-scan what-ya-call-it thingy done?
And Trowa should get one done too!
And While you're at it -get your leg checked out. You know the one you uhhh broke and put back into place.
If you already have, pay no mind to what I typed above.

Or you can tell me to mind my own business.

How's ya pet coyote?


Oh yeah, sorry Calla. It not relaxing is it?

[Raspberry]

The story was great. I wish I had my own katana... But I know how does it feel like to be the one with sword... Mmm, the cool of blade under my fingers, the weight of sword in my hands, the sound of cutting air...

Heero I've just read the advices you gave Simply. It's bit worse in my case. My bro is the eldest, and he's simply stupid. When I try to speak with him he shouts: "Get lost, you idiot!" or "Fu** off you brat! I don't have time!", so talking is worthless. And I don't have any blackmail. He doesn't have any porn magazines, diares etc. I won't take his camera, mini-disk or cell, cuz my parents could be angry too. And I won't take his money as well. Besides, he could make the great argue, involving my parents and that's dangerous. Violence - not for me. I wish I could hurt in THAT way, but I told ya I don't have any chances. And any tricks like doing something with shoes or whatever are dangerous as well. He's always like an angry bull ( :evil: <-- his face looks similar), ready to hurt me or at least argue very, very loudly (neighbours are not so careless ). Oh, and the tips you gave Simply... Are useless in my 'war' just like in hers. We live in flat, so no exlax -or how did you called it- in food, family bathroom, no invisible wall etc. Oh please, please help me!.. I really want to vengeance...