For Life: For Love: Chapter [3/?]

[Hitomi Lei]

Disclaimer: I still don?t own Inuyasha. Ignore any errors in spelling or grammar as I don?t really have a beta for this story yet. Also thanks goes to all the people who encouraged me to write this story.



AN: for the purposes of this story, Myoga is a bit bigger than normal?say at least as big as Shippou?yeah?that sounds about right.



Chapter Three: I looked High and Low

Would you look at her as she looks at me
she's got me thinkin about her constantly
but she don't know how I feel
and as she carries on without a doubt
I wonder if she's figured out
I'm crazy for this girl

She was the one to hold me
the night the sky fell down
and what was I thinkin when
the world didn't end
why didn't I know what I know now

--Crazy for this Girl, Evan and Jaron


The sunlight gleamed off the walls of glass that made up the high-rise buildings, making the business district of Tokyo look more like molten towers of silver instead of the dull offices that they were in reality. Inuyasha sat in one of those glass enclosed offices, staring out at the tiny people scurrying about below. He wondered absently if any one of those insignificant people down there had a life as fucked up as his. Nothing in his life made since anymore. The very person that kept his world stable, secure, worth living?was gone, maybe forever. For an instant it all caught up to him and he felt like his very soul was being spun apart in a maelstrom of unnamed emotions. He was almost consumed by his confusion?Then he shook his head and the feeling passed. Inuyasha leaned back in his leather desk chair and rubbed his eyes roughly.

Now was not the time to let his emotions run out of control. Right now he was supposed to be reviewing a proposal for?something?he wasn?t quite sure what though. Sesshomaru wouldn?t be happy if he didn?t get it done today, his older brother had been patient with his lack progress during the last few days, but even the stoic Sesshomaru had his limits. Inuyasha understood that, really he did, but he didn?t give a damn. Let Sesshomaru lose a mate not twenty-four hours after the bond was made and then try to focus on a bloody merger proposal. Inuyasha finally gave up on working and pushed away from his messy desk. He walked over to the wall length window and just stared out at the sky, ignoring the swarms of people living their lives out below him. His head lightly thudded against the glass as his eyes misted over. Kami-sama, he had to get a hold of himself?all the tears in the world wouldn?t bring her back if he couldn?t find her. He should know, he?d shed plenty of tears during the last five hellish days.

Kagome had been gone for five days. He still couldn?t quite grasp it.

For the first couple of days Inuyasha had looked for her himself. He called every bus station and airport. When no one seemed inclined to help him, he?d visited them himself, but that course of action only got him kicked out of all the transportation outlets in the city. On the fourth morning when Miroku had finally bailed him out of jail, where he?d spent the night for ?threading to do violence? to the manager of the city bus station, Inuyasha had broken down and called up a private investigator his father used when looking into a potential merger.

Now all he had to do was wait for Myoga to call.

But waiting was hard for Inuyasha. Add to his natural impatiens was the fact that as an inu-hanyou his instincts told him that he needed his mate by his side. It was like a physical pain, only deeper, as if his very soul was being ripped in two. He looked as if he was in pain too. Dark shadows ringed both his eyes in uneven half circles. Inuyasha normally kept his hair neatly clasped at the base of his scull with a black ribbon, but today it hung around his face in dank strands. He pushed it out of his vision for what had to be the hundredth time that day, and wondered suddenly just how long it had been since he?d washed it. That thought made his sigh again and his head bumped against the window once more.

Kagome loved to comb his hair when in was freshly clean. Kagome was gone now. There would be no one around to gently remove the tangles for him.

A loud buzzing sound filled the air and woke Inuyasha up from his thoughts. He turned back toward the room and growled at the intercom sitting on the corner of his desk before punching the button that would allow his secretary to hear him.

?What do you want?? He snapped.

?A man is here to see you. He says his name is Myoga.? The secretary?s voice had an irritating lack of emotion that set Inuyasha?s nerves on end, but she was a good worker and Sesshomaru wouldn?t be happy if Inuyasha ran off yet another employee this month.

?Send him in Kanna.?

?Would you like me to bring coffee??

?No, I don?t want anything to disturb us at all. It?s your job on the line if so much as a spider crawls under the door, do you understand me?? Not even the threat of losing her job fazed the secretary. But that might have been because Inuyasha said something like this every day.

?Yes, Kunikada-sama?



~*~*~*~*~*~



?What have you found out?? Inuyasha demanded as soon as Myoga hopped in through the door. The flea demon took his time sitting down before answering his boss.

?Well, Inuyasha-sama, I found out two things, some good news and some bad news, I suppose you could say.? He folded all four of his arms across his chest in an air of self importance. Inuyasha?s ears twitched in agitation as the silence in the room stretched out longer than two seconds.

?You?d better fucking tell me something soon, or I?ll throw you out the damn window!? Inuyasha wasn?t about play the P.I?s game.

?Patients Inuyasha-sama, all in due time. Do you think your little secretary could bring me some tea?? Inuyasha growled deep in his chest and reached for the lapels on Myoga?s suit. He held him up out of his chair and cocked an eyebrow toward the window. Myoga got the message. ?I don?t really have to have that cup of tea right now.? He laughed nervously.

?I didn?t think so.? Myoga started to stutter out his news as Inuyasha none too gently dropped him back into the cushion.

?Y..y..yes, well, as I was saying I?ve tracked Kagome-sama to the North Tokyo Airport where she got on a plane to L.A---?

?THE BITCH LEFT THE COUNTRY AGAIN! I should have known.? Inuyasha jerked his jacket up from the back of the chair and almost ran toward the door of his office with angry strides. He couldn?t believe that she?d go to such lengths to get away from him. Something inside of him felt betrayed and hurt. Going back to her family like that meant she didn?t even want to give him a chance to make things right.

?I?ll have to show her, I?ll have to show her that what we have is worth it! That she just can?t leave me and think I?d not come after her! She?s mine damn it! I made her mine!?

?But Inuyasha-sama! I haven?t told you everything yet! You can?t leave now!?

?I?m tired of your games old man! I have to go get my mate! Kanna, book me a flight to LA. I don?t care if I have to use the company jet, just make sure that it leaves within an hour. Oh and make sure Sesshomaru gets a memo about this so his shorts don?t get in a knot, and have all my work transferred over to that new junior associate, what?s her name again??

?Rin.?

?But Inuyasha-sama! You don?t understand??The P.I was struggling to get out to the chair, his haste making him clumsy.

?Tell her that if she screws up anything I?ll make sure Sesshomaru finds out it was her fault, and make sure the old man in there gets paid and escorted out of my office.?

?Yes, Kunikada-sama.?

?No, you must listen to what I have to tell you!? Myoga tried in vain to catch Inuyasha before the elevator doors shut but he was too late. Kanna watched dispassionately as the little man slumped against the gold tone door and beat against it with his fist.

?You don?t understand Inuyasha-sama! Kagome-sama never made it to L.A! She got off the plane!? He wailed.

Kanna continued to punch in the number for the company pilot, but at Myoga?s words a small smile crossed her face. It served her boss right to be sent on this wild goose chase for all the times he?d threatened fire her.

?Yes, Kagara? Kunikada Inuyasha will be leaving in an hour for LA. He requests the use of one of the private jets.?



~*~*~*~*~*~*~



Inuyasha swore as he wrenched the door of his apartment open with a forceful yank. He went tripping through the house, trying to fight his way over the clutter that had accumulated in the last five days and get to the bedroom he used to share with Kagome. Once he made it to the darkened room, he purposely ignored the dried up rose petals that still littered the floor.

Inuyasha jerked a small suitcase and carry-on bag out of the closet and tossed them to the floor. He then went about tearing open dresser drawers, in a vain attempt to hurry up and find his clothes. Kagome always put up his clothes away for him when they were clean because she didn?t like the way he crammed everything into one drawer. Kagome also packed his bags whenever he traveled because she was always afraid he would only pack one pair of underwear.

?Controlling bitch?? She might have been that, but oh how he missed her.

Pulling open a drawer the protested loudly, he found not clothes, but picture albums. Without pausing he shoved the three top most albums into his carry on case and reached for another drawer. If he hurried, he just might have time for a quick shower before heading to the airport.



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~



Sango was tired, more tired than she?d ever been while pregnant with Rei. She sat down heavily on her couch and rested her forehead in her palms. Her cousin and best friend in the world was gone again.

?Only this time I don?t know where she is, Kami-sama. I don?t know if she made it there safe. I couldn?t stand to see her with that hurt look on her face a week ago. I was determined to keep her safe like I should have last time. But now that she?s gone and I see how frantic Inuyasha is I can?t help but wonder if I made a mistake by just letting her go like that.?

Sango felt so torn. Inuyasha had been her friend for a long time, since junior high, but Kagome was family and the closest thing to a sister she?d ever have. If Kagome called, would she tell Inuyasha where to find his lost mate?

Mate.

Sango cringed at that thought. Inuyasha had surly hurt Kagome more by keeping that secret than her leaving had him.

He?d made his bed, now it was time for him to sleep in it.

Not that he could sleep. Sango knew a little about youkai bounding from health class. Ideally, a newly mated couple should spend as much time together as possible to insure that their bound grew strong. If not given this time, the side effects could be painful not just for the newly linked couple, but for those around them as well.

The ringing phone interrupted Sango?s thought pattern and she hurried to answer it before its obnoxious sound could wake Rei.

?Moshi moshi!? She greeted as she picked up the handset.

?Sango? It?s Kagome.? Sango had to sit down before her legs gave out in her relief to here the other woman?s voice.



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~



Inuyasha sat looking out the window as the company jet he flew in took him closer to his destination. He was restless, almost feeling as if he was getting farther away from Kagome instead of nearer.

?How am I going to convince her to come back? I just can?t throw her over my shoulder and drag her back?Fucking hell, when did this all get so damn complicated?? He pushed himself away from the window with a scrawl. He would not think about it now. He was determined to get some sleep so that when he found Kagome she wouldn?t know just how lost he?d been without her.

?Ah, fuck, why hide it? Maybe if she see just how damn lost I am without her she?ll come back.?

?Did you say something Kunikada-sama?? Yura, the lone attendant for the flight asked. Inuyasha didn?t even spare her a glance, just absently waved her away. Yura frowned but didn?t push the obviously agitated hanyou anymore. After all, if Inuyasha wasn?t inclined to ask for things then she could spend more time on the internet looking for a new wig to add to her collection.

There was some turbulence about the time Inuyasha sat up in his seat and his carry-on bag fell out of the over head compartment and landed on his head.

?Bloody fucking hell! What kind of heavy shit did I pack in this damn thing?? He rubbed the knot that was beginning to form on his skull and looked around to see if Yura could bring him an ice pack. She was no where to be seen.

?Figures.? He mumbled and continued to rub his head. With his free hand he reached into the bag to find out what ever had caused his so much pain and pulled out the photo albums he?d shoved inside earlier.

?I forgot I put these in here.? He forgot about the bump on his head the moment he opened the first book. A picture of Kagome around the time he?d first met her stared up at him. Inuyasha smirked at the image of the almost chubby cheeked girl with the twinkle in her blue eyes that his Kagome had been. She was pretty then, but she was beautiful now.

The next picture was one of all of them together, but it must have been taken while Kagome and he still hated each other because they were glaring at each other in the back ground. The next was a candid shot of him catching her before she fell down a flight of steps. Inuyasha marveled at the expression on his own face. He looked concerned but it was more than that?deeper. For the first time he wondered if he?d been in love with her even then. A hand written caption beside the picture caught his eye.

[My hero]

That?s all it said, but it was enough to make Inuyasha turn the page quickly. He didn?t want to know?didn?t want to think about what her feelings had been all those years ago. But the next pages were no better. With each passing page came a new insight into Kagome?s world, and Inuyasha began to realize that these books weren?t just picture albums, but that they were a kind of journal. Like diaries with photographs.

He felt tears prick his eyes when he found a picture obviously taken right after she?d left the first time. The caption beside it read

[I?m alone again.]

Then the glossy pages began to be filled with pictures of her family and classmates from college, and Inuyasha could feel that she was beginning to be happy again. It bothered him when he realized that she had been well on her way to forgetting all about him before Sango called her back to Japan. He had to switch books to continue exploring her life and he found that again the pages of her journal were filled with pictures of the both of them, along with Sango, Miroku and Rei.

He saw pictures of trips they?d taken, pictures of their college graduation, and a few pictures she?d apparently snuck while he was sleeping. Inuyasha was reminded all over again just why he loved Kagome so much. She was always smiling, always warm and happy and?he didn?t have the words to continue on with everything his Kagome was to him.

Inuyasha finally got to the last page of the last book and he felt as if a giant fist was crushing his heart in its grip. There was only one picture placed in the middle of the page. It had been taken at their friends? house while they were all gathered to celebrate Rei?s fifth birthday. It was a candid shot of Kagome looking over at Inuyasha with eyes filled with a strange mixture of love and sorrow, while he gazed at a picture of Kikyou on the mantle with what looked like obvious longing. The caption for this last picture made him close his eyes in pain.

[The story of my life, I love him, he loves her]

?This is your captain speaking. We are beginning our descent over L.A. Please sit down and buckle up.?

Inuyasha didn?t know what he was going to say to her once he found her, but he was going to make Kagome understand that he loved her, and only her, even if it took him forever to prove it.



TBC



AN: Erg?Inuyasha was such a wimp in this chapter?but it was needful. After this chapter he?d not going to be so noodle-y like. After this he?d going to quit feeling sorry for himself and the things he can?t change and?well if I said anymore it would give it away. Lets just say that last chapter he realized what a big screw up he was, this chapter he deals with his mistakes, and in the next chapter he?s going to accept them and move on to finding Kagome.

We get to see how Kagome?s been doing in the next chapter too, so don?t miss the answer to all those questions as to why she can?t have a love life now that Inuyasha?s claimed her.

In other notes, I?d like to explain why Inuyasha marked her after he?d argued that they shouldn?t get married. It?s one of those heart over head things. In his head he was afraid of making that kind of commitment, but in his heart he was afraid to loose her. As an inu-hanyou Inuyasha?s heart is closely tied to his instincts, so there you have it.

And my inspiration for Kagome running away like she does comes from the show. Every time she has a fight with Inuyasha, or gets stressed she heads for the well. It just seems like she?d be the type to still run away even if there wasn?t a well?Just thought you?d all like to know that.

Thanks to everyone that read the last chapters! I love you all!

[Lara Winner]

WAAAAAH!

Okay if this gets any more depressing I'm going to kill myself. Of course that might be more trouble then its worth because I'd still have to come back to read the rest of this. Excellent chapter! The fact that Inu-kun was a little "noodle-y like" is okay because now we really know how much he loves her... and it makes for an interesting reunion.

But still...

WAAAH!!!!

[Eden]

I can't believe it took me sooo long to finally read this, but it did, and now I have.

Ahhh! The suspence is killing me! Really it is! *Cough, cough!*

Okay, not quite, but almost.

*Smacks Inuyasha* That's for not paying enough attention to what's going on around you! And you thought that you had changed a little after Kagome left you. Rotten child.

I can't wait to see what Inuyasha does when he finds out that Kagome's not with her family. Personally, I'm holding out for the classic blow up, but change can be good too.

Love this! Can't wait to see more!

~Eden