The Fly

[Amidala]

Warning: this is a completely nuts RPG sessiong that I had with my Alucard. It all from my comment of about a fly that was driving me nuts... "Alucard" Pip, "Me" SlrNinja. Alucard plays Pip and Alucard.. me, Interga, and Walter.. This doesn't exactly fall into the 'romance' category... but it was just funny....

Pip Bernadette: 'ey Integra
SlrNinja: hey.
Pip Bernadette: 'ow are ya dis fine evenin?
SlrNinja: Danm these flies!!
Pip Bernadette: O.o'
SlrNinja: How are you?
Pip Bernadette: i am doin quite well thanx..how about yerself?
SlrNinja: Danm flies. I'm fine.
Pip Bernadette: what flies?
SlrNinja: There are flies buzzing around me.
SlrNinja: >:o
Pip Bernadette: kill em all!!!
SlrNinja: *takes out pistol* [BANG! BANG! BANG!]
Pip Bernadette: ::hits the deck::
SlrNinja: bloody hell. I missed.
Pip Bernadette: ::takes out sawed off shot gun::..want me to try boss?
SlrNinja: *sighs* Thanks.. but perhaps we should do it the more conventional way.
Pip Bernadette: ::eyebrow twitches::..never let me 'ave fun anymore
SlrNinja: well, we don't want to get everybody involved.
Pip Bernadette: ::grummbles::..i can silence it
SlrNinja: I don't want to defeat the purpose by ventilating my office.
Pip Bernadette: ::grummbles again..pulls out grenade launcher::
SlrNinja: *ducks for cover*
Pip Bernadette: ::fires off grenade launcher..knocking out wall..he flies back into another wall::...owww
SlrNinja: *crawls out from underneath desk* did you get it?
Pip Bernadette: ::looks up::yeah..i think..wait till da smoke clears
SlrNinja: *lights cigar*
Pip Bernadette: ::gets up and dusts off..tossing launcher which lands on desk and breaks it::..oops
SlrNinja: Oh, well. I needed a new desk anyway.
Pip Bernadette: well..ye got a new window now
SlrNinja: *sigh* perhaps a larger one that let's the sun in so somebody won't bother me all day and all night.
Pip Bernadette: :;laughs::..i dont think 'e will like dat much
SlrNinja: No. he wouldn't.
Pip Bernadette: good..'e needs ta know whos master..i think 'es been gettin outta line lately..but dats my oppinion
SlrNinja: but then again, if I were to prevent him from completely bothering me during the day, he would only make up for it at night.
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs even harder::..
SlrNinja: he's bored and he unfortunately finds annoying me amusing.
Pip Bernadette: well..yer easy ta annoy boss
SlrNinja: *looks annoyed*
Pip Bernadette: well its true ye know..i mean..i can even annoy ye without tryin
SlrNinja: *sigh*
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs a bit::see told ye..im already annoyin ya
SlrNinja: *a fly buzzes by* AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!
Pip Bernadette: ::starts shooting at it with his Walther p100::
SlrNinja: *starts firing her own pistol*
Pip Bernadette: 'ey watch where ye firin boss.almost took me'ead off!!
SlrNinja: *hearing the ruckuss, Walter enters the office and sees the improptu target practice.* Oh dear.
Pip Bernadette: ::shoots again..and almost hits walter::
Pip Bernadette: (this rp is fun^_^)
SlrNinja: (lol... seriously, a fly has been buzzing me all night!)
SlrNinja: Sir Integra! What is going on here?
Pip Bernadette: ::is still shooting::
SlrNinja: Danm flies!!! Die, fly! DIE!!!!! [BANG! BANG!]
Pip Bernadette: ::is lauhging manicaly and breaks out anti tank cannon::
SlrNinja: W: Enough of this madness!
SlrNinja: *Integra looks at Walter*
Pip Bernadette: :;loads shell::um walter..i would move if i were you
SlrNinja: W: ahem. Have you tried using bug spray?
Pip Bernadette: ::shoots anyway::
SlrNinja: *Integra looks satisfied.*
Pip Bernadette: ::smiles..with cig in mouth::whooweee..i love dat hole i just made
SlrNinja: *sighs* well, that's going to make a dent in the budget.
Pip Bernadette: ::i slaughing again::..anythin else need killin?
SlrNinja: How about a useless vampire in the basement.
SlrNinja: *snicker*
Pip Bernadette: ok..i can do dat::starts headin out door..::
SlrNinja: You do know which one I mean don't you?
SlrNinja: W: =-O
Pip Bernadette: i can kill both if ye want
SlrNinja: No, just one.
Pip Bernadette: ok..i take it its da one in red?
SlrNinja: Red? I don't think you could kill him that easily. Besides, he's useful.
Pip Bernadette: aw man..yer no fun::looks disapointed::
SlrNinja: *loads another clip and tucks a few in her pockets* well, it would be fun to try now wouldn't it? And we just might take the useless one out in the process. Let's go.
SlrNinja: W: =-O
Pip Bernadette: heh heh..yeah..i can finnaly get back at dat bitche fer teasin me><
Pip Bernadette: ::heads torwards door with a smile::
SlrNinja: ::follows...::
Pip Bernadette: ::lights a cig and takes out a 50 caliber revolver..and heads torwards the basement::
SlrNinja: Seras: ::sitting at her table... staring at the packet of medical blood she was given....hasn't moved since last night... she hasn't moved since last night...
Pip Bernadette: ::walks in smiling..pointing gun at her::..time fer ya to die girl
SlrNinja: S: huh?
I: say your prayers, vampire. [bang]
Pip Bernadette: ::shoots as well::
SlrNinja: (whee! It's up to $36.50! http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&i tem=3240124908)
Pip Bernadette: (um..yay?)
SlrNinja: S: ::looks at holes in her chest:: Sir Intrega? Pip? MAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTEEEEEEERRRR !!
SlrNinja: (it's money... I need money!)
Pip Bernadette: (alucard comes through the wall:: what is goin on?
SlrNinja: ::Walter enters... wires drawn...:: Sir Integra, Pip, that will be enough!
Pip Bernadette: ::pip is laughing and pumping bullets into her::
SlrNinja: I: ::fires a round of bullets around Alucard's form. laughing manaically::
Pip Bernadette: ::alucard steps back and laughs as the wounds heal automaticaly::
SlrNinja: W: ::turns to Alucard:: they appear to have lost their minds completely , I'm afraid.
Pip Bernadette: i see..well then..i shall leave them to you..im sure you do not wish them dead
Pip Bernadette: ::turns gun on walter::
SlrNinja: W: OH my. ::releases wire to grab gun away from Pip
Pip Bernadette: ::dodges wire and fires at walter::
SlrNinja: ::dodges in behind Alucard because he is the only thing that there is to dodge behind.
SlrNinja: I: countinues to fire around Alucard
Pip Bernadette: ::runs over and grabs pip by the throat and lifts him up::..well walter..what should i do?
SlrNinja: W: knock him out... we will examine him later.
Pip Bernadette: you had better do it..i will surly break his neck
Pip Bernadette: ::is struggling and shooting at the same time::
SlrNinja: I: ::laughing manaically turns to Seras::
SlrNinja: ::walter uses wire to grab chair and hits Pip on head.
Pip Bernadette: ::falls silent and is limp::
Pip Bernadette: ::alucard drops pip and grabs integra and pins her arms behind her bac::
SlrNinja: I: Die you useless little BITCH! Let me go!
SlrNinja: I: ::shoots Alucard in foot.
Pip Bernadette: ::keeps ahold of her..wincing a bit::..walter..some assistance
SlrNinja: ::walter calmly approadhes Integra and applies the 'vulcan nerve pinch' :: Sweet dreams.
SlrNinja: ::Integra goes limp but manages to shoot Alucard in the foot once more::
Pip Bernadette: ow..damn woman
SlrNinja: W: wonder what got into them...
Pip Bernadette: i have no clue..but its not good..i cant have a psycho as my master
SlrNinja: W: This has never happened in the past... she was always sund a quiet child.
Pip Bernadette: pip i can see goin berserk..hes only worked here for a week..but integra...
Pip Bernadette: maybe hes a bad influence
SlrNinja: Perhaps... you should keep an eye on him
Pip Bernadette: hm..i will leave that to you..i will not waste my time on a human
SlrNinja: You seen to enjoy keeping an eye on Sir Integra.
Pip Bernadette: she is another matter
SlrNinja: ::gives the vampire a look::
Pip Bernadette: what?..i will not watch no soldier..it is not my job
SlrNinja: S: uuuuuuhhhhhnnnnnggggg
SlrNinja: No, it is not. Forgive me for asking.
Pip Bernadette: ::looks down::shes coming out of it
SlrNinja: I wish she would drink her blood like a good vampire... then perhaps, Sir Integra would not see her as useless.
Pip Bernadette: yes...well..i can only controll her so much
SlrNinja: ::walter picked up the spoiled packet of blood:: then there is the matter of this.. Integra does not like to see things wasted.
Pip Bernadette: yes..i realize they are not cheap
SlrNinja: Then again, this is nothing. You should see the redecorating she and Pip did to her office this evening.
SlrNinja: S: uuuuuuuuuuuggggggggnnnnnnnn
Pip Bernadette: ooo..that bad huh?..well..what do we do now?..i suggest not staying here
SlrNinja: While I do not wish to be around when Sir Integra wakes up, I do not wish to not be around either. No doubt I or you will be the first person she blames for this.
Pip Bernadette: of course..i am used to it by now
Pip Bernadette: ::pip is sitting up and rubbing his head::
SlrNinja: As am I
SlrNinja: S: uuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnggggggggg
Pip Bernadette: what da bloody 'ell?
SlrNinja: Good evening.
Pip Bernadette: oh dont ye even good evenin me..ill kick yer ass in a min
SlrNinja: Do you know where you are?
Pip Bernadette: not really::winces cuz his head hurts::
SlrNinja: You and Sir Integra seem to have gone on a little rampage.. ventilated her office, and then decided to come down here and do a bit of hunting.
Pip Bernadette: what..the 'ell are ye talkin about old man?
SlrNinja: ::walter points to the Alucard shaped silhouettes on the wall:: Integra is responsible for those... and you.. :: he pointed to the moaning Seras on the floor::
Pip Bernadette: oops..oh well..she deserved it
SlrNinja: Do you have any idea what happened?
Pip Bernadette: not really
SlrNinja: *sighs* alucard, will miss victoria be all right?
Pip Bernadette: ::goes over to her::she will be fine..healing a bit slow..but she will still be fine
SlrNinja: Good... Pip you and I will pay a visit to the good doctor. Alucard, will you take Sir Integra upstairs. I want the doctor to examine her as well.
Pip Bernadette: ::lifts integra up and phases through wall with her::
Pip Bernadette: no way..i aint goin old man
SlrNinja: well, then, you and stay here with her.. ::points to Seras:: and I could tell Sir Integra that the redecorating was you doing if she doesn't remember anything.
Pip Bernadette: ::twitches::..fine..ill go..damn you
SlrNinja: I: ::wakes up in Alucard's arms:: Unhand me you beast! What in heaven's name are you doing?
Pip Bernadette: takin your psychotic ass to the doctor
SlrNinja: I:psychotic ass?
Pip Bernadette: yes..correct..i will explain when we get there
SlrNinja: Doctor: ??
Pip Bernadette: yes
SlrNinja: D: what is the problem?
Pip Bernadette: this woman..and him::motions to the fallowing pip::went on an unexplained rampage
SlrNinja: D: rampage? Integra?
SlrNinja: I: we are here now, alucard. unhand me!
Pip Bernadette: ::lest her go::..yes..she decided to attempt to kill me..personally i found it very humorous
SlrNinja: I: my trying to kill me is not so unusual, Alucard.
SlrNinja: (sorry... Las Vegas friend called...)
Pip Bernadette: i know..but with that much malice it is
SlrNinja: malice? you're exaggerating.
Pip Bernadette: heh..well..that may be..but you are still getting examined
SlrNinja: I: ::protests:: I do not need to be examined.
Pip Bernadette: yes..you do..now cooperate or we will have to hinder you uconcious again
SlrNinja: W: would you care to see the damage you've done to your office now, or after I've gotten an estimate on the cost to fix it?
Pip Bernadette: ::smirks::
SlrNinja: I: You lay a hand on me again, Alucard and I will make sure I finish what I apparently started... ::turns to Walter:: what damage? and don't you smirk at me, Alucard.
Pip Bernadette: ::just smiles and stands by walter::
SlrNinja: W: well, it seems that you've added a new window and doubled the size of your office.
Pip Bernadette: :::laughs::
Pip Bernadette: ::pip is looking rather embarrassed::
SlrNinja: I: :: look at Walter... death glares Alucard::
SlrNinja: I: ::turns to Pip:: You! This is your fault, isn't it!
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs even harder::
Pip Bernadette: no..no its not..i didnt do it!..i swear!!
SlrNinja: Doctor: well, this will go a lot faster if you cooperate.
Pip Bernadette: ::is looking panicked..eye is twitchin::
SlrNinja: I: well, the FINE! I will go first. You will see, Walter, Alucard that there is NOTHING wrong with me.
Pip Bernadette: ::pip even laughs at this::
SlrNinja: I: laugh again and I'm docking your pay. You aren't so innocent either it seems.
SlrNinja: W: now,now... let's not do that again..
Pip Bernadette: ::chuckles slightly..trying not to laugh::
SlrNinja: ::doctor does his doctor stuff... Looks at the others:: could we hav some privacy here?
Pip Bernadette: ::walks outta the room to runaway before walter says anything::
SlrNinja: I: ::sits up:: What are you going to do? ::gets pushed back down::
SlrNinja: ::walter grabbs Pip by the shirt:: Oh no you don't.
Pip Bernadette: aw come on..lemme go!!
SlrNinja: ::doctor continues doctor stuff with Integra::
SlrNinja: W: you are going to get examined wheter you want to or not.
Pip Bernadette: well..FYI i dont want to!!!::pulls away::
SlrNinja: ::Integra screams:: You want me to do what in that thing?
Pip Bernadette: ::starts busting up hysterically::
SlrNinja: ::Integra comes out from behnd the doctor curtain carrying a small plastic cup. She glares at Pip, and walks past Walter and Alucard to the restroom... and does NOT appear happy.::
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs even harder..turning colours::
SlrNinja: Doctor: ::comes out form behind the curtain:: while we are waiting for Sir Integra, I can begin my examination of you.
Pip Bernadette: what?!..uh uh..no way!!::heads for the door like a bat otta hell::
SlrNinja: W: Alucard, get him!
Pip Bernadette: ::alucard makes a grab but misses::
Pip Bernadette: ::is out the door::
SlrNinja: W: Integra will not be pleased if he doesn't get examined as well.
Pip Bernadette: well..i will leave that to you then::phases through wall::
SlrNinja: ::Integra carrying a plastic container filled with yellow liquid gets bumped by somebody running out the door.::
Pip Bernadette: ::keeps running..grummbling obsene remarks due to the spillage on his uniform::
SlrNinja: ::grumbles as now her hands are wet... and returns.::
Pip Bernadette: ::hides in his room..panting heavily
SlrNinja: (Hey! I'm in the doctor's room all by myself!!)
Pip Bernadette: (hee hee...oops..well..get walter to get pip)
SlrNinja: I: ::hands the doctor her sample, curses at Walter then notices that Alucard is gone.)
Pip Bernadette: ::has decided to take a shower::
SlrNinja: I: Pip is not getting out of this Walter. Find him and bring him back hear. Hog tie him if you have to.
SlrNinja: W: as you wish.
SlrNinja: W: ::goes to Pip's room...
Pip Bernadette: ::is in shower::
SlrNinja: ::waits::
Pip Bernadette: ::comes out in rhobe..his hair down out of the braid..his eyepatch off..doesnt notice walter::
SlrNinja: ::taking Integra's words to heart, Walter has brought some rope and quickly hog ties Pip::
Pip Bernadette: ::looks confused:;HEY!!!..WHAT DA 'ELL..LEMME GO!!..FOR DA LOVE OF ALL DAT IS GOOD AND EVIL!!!!!
SlrNinja: Integra has given me orders to return you to the doctor's table. since you will not come willingly...
Pip Bernadette: GOD DAMN SONOFA BITCH!!!!..LEMME GO WALTER!!!::bites walters leg::
SlrNinja: :kicks:: well, are you going to come willingly?
Pip Bernadette: 'ELL NO..WOULD YOU?!?!?!
SlrNinja: between you and me, no. But on the other hand, I would not like to face an angry Integra in the morning.
Pip Bernadette: ::mummbles::god damn dat woman..fine..ill go
SlrNinja: ::unties him::
Pip Bernadette: ::gets up..goes and puts his eyepatch on::bloody dont 'ave time to do my 'air..fine..lets go::lights a cig and leaves the room::
SlrNinja: Doctor: ::testing...:: hmmm.. hmmmm.... hmmmmm... hmmmmm....
Pip Bernadette: ::sighs::
SlrNinja: I: What? will you stop saying that!
Pip Bernadette: ::walks in the room looking very annoyed::
SlrNinja: ::walter enters as doctor reports his findings..::
Pip Bernadette: shes a psycho aint she?
SlrNinja: D: well, it seems that there is a foreign substance in her system. I suspect it may have been put in her cigars...
Pip Bernadette: i knew it..she spikes 'er smokes!!
SlrNinja: I: ::looking insulted:: I do not!
SlrNinja: W: hmmmm...
SlrNinja: I: don't do that!
Pip Bernadette: well..deres da profe!!::laughs::
SlrNinja: I: there are only two people who could have the opportunity to do something like that. And one I trust would not... and the other....
SlrNinja: I: ALUCARD!!!
Pip Bernadette: ::is busting up beyond beliefe::..'e....'e went out::laughs harder::
SlrNinja: ::walter can't help but snicker as well::
SlrNinja: I: ::growls at the two laughing men::
Pip Bernadette: ::leans against wall cuz hes laughing to hard::
SlrNinja: I: ::gets up from the table and storms out the room.::
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs more::
SlrNinja: I: ::storms down to the besment....::
Pip Bernadette: ::is sitting down..calming down a bit::
SlrNinja: W: ::holidng side from laughing.:: well, that was amusing.
SlrNinja: Seras: uh... I don't feel so good.... Master?
Pip Bernadette: yeah..i needed dat..whoo weee..never seen 'er so damn pissed
Pip Bernadette: oh well..i must be off::gets up to leave
Pip Bernadette: ::
SlrNinja: W: I must and assess the damage and prepare myself for what is surely to follow.
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs a bit as he exits the room::..well..im gonna go continue my shower..den im goin out fer a drink
SlrNinja: W: I think that I would like to join you, for a drink if you don't mind the company...
SlrNinja: W: Tomorrow is going to be a long day.
Pip Bernadette: oh man..dats fine with me..just lemme go get dressed
Pip Bernadette: ::takes the rest of his shower and rebraids his hair..coming out in t shirt and jeans::
SlrNinja: W: well, things may get ugly tonight... we should leave.
Pip Bernadette: i agree..come on..we can take my Hummer
SlrNinja: I: ::storms into the basement levels... grumbles and curses at the useless Police Girl.. resisting the urge to kick her...::
Pip Bernadette: ::heads for the main gate with walter in Hummer::
SlrNinja: W: ::hears Integra scream from the basement ALUCARD! :: OH dear. I think we left just in time. Step on it.
Pip Bernadette: ::alucard phases through wall::..yes?
SlrNinja: WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME?
Pip Bernadette: what ever do you mean?
SlrNinja: Don't play innocent with me, Alucard.
Pip Bernadette: ::smirks::..i sereously do not know what you are talking about master
SlrNinja: You spiked my cigars. Only you or Walter would have had access or the means to do such a thing.
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs::i did no such thing
SlrNinja: ::walks up to him like a determined child, takes off his glasses and looks him in the eyes to see if she can tell if he is being truthful.::
Pip Bernadette: ::just looks at her with emotionless eyes::
SlrNinja: Damn you.
Pip Bernadette: too late
Pip Bernadette: ::smirks::
SlrNinja: Grrrrrrr.
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs slightly::
SlrNinja: ::turns around and walks out... kicking Seras on the way out.::
Pip Bernadette: ::laughs even harder::
SlrNinja: STOP LAUGHING!!
Pip Bernadette: ::appears above her..hanging out of the celing::..but master..it is too much fun
SlrNinja: It won't be much fun when I have to channel your blood supply funds to fix my window in my office.
Pip Bernadette: i can go out to feed if necessery
SlrNinja: Of course, I could always starve the Police Girl since she never drinks it anyway...
Pip Bernadette: i would take her out with me
SlrNinja: True.. but you I don't mind. You I trust not to make a mess of things...
Pip Bernadette: i can teach the police girl if need be
SlrNinja: Alucard, truthfully, if you didn't spike the cigars who did... and if it was you, I won't kill you this time.
Pip Bernadette: i am already dead anyway..and no..i did no such thing
SlrNinja: you know what I mean... but if you didn't who did?
Pip Bernadette: i have no clue master
SlrNinja: *sighs*
Pip Bernadette: ::drops down from the celing::
SlrNinja: I need to go and get some cigars.... I have a headache, and I'm really hungry...
Pip Bernadette: as you wish..walter and pip left by the way
SlrNinja: I'm not surprised. Proabably wanted to get away from the rampaging mad woman.
Pip Bernadette: i dont blame them::smirks::
SlrNinja: Even though I have no memory of what I did, Alucard, I'm sorry. I would have hated to kill you like that... not remembering that I did it.
Pip Bernadette: you cannot kill me..so dont worry
SlrNinja: ( @_@ I should go to sleep...)
Pip Bernadette: (lol..whatever ya want)
SlrNinja: ( I have to work again tomorrow... so I really must sleep )
Pip Bernadette: (okies..well..i will not be on tonight..im goin to Arizona)
SlrNinja: (lol this was really fun... and btw the fly is still here...)
Pip Bernadette: (gha!!!..damn fly><)
SlrNinja: (Arizona? guess I shouldn't say cool, eh? )
Pip Bernadette: (i know..oh well..im cosplayin down there)
SlrNinja: cosplay?
Pip Bernadette: yeah..we gonna go do public cosplay
SlrNinja: oh yeah... you mentioned that. have fun!
Pip Bernadette: thankies..i will cya later
SlrNinja: good night.
Pip Bernadette: good night

[melrose_stormhaven]

wokey.... :-?

[Eden]

I kinda thought it was funny, . . .

~Eden

[Arucard]

LOL..i forgot we did that rp