Say I do; One Shot

[Shevey]

Say I do
-shev


A cast of shadows on the wall.

The drip of the coffee maker.

An occasional echo of silence.

Four am.

Bags packed.

Bittersweet sighs.

?You don?t have to go.?

I felt my heart thud, and rolled the empty coke bottle between my palms. ?I know.?

He leaned further back into the wall. ?Then why are you still leaving??

I smiled resentfully.?You don?t want me here.?

?Perhaps.? Oh, that was sure to win me over. What a sweet talker. He frowned slightly, as if he realized he didn?t just say the nicest response possible. ?But I need you here.?

?You?ll survive.? I leaned forward, maintaining my balance on top of my suitcase. I watched him closely. The rise of his chest. The way his hair looked more torn than usual. The way his eyes kept steady. The pierce blue that spoke volumes, yet so cold, and still, understanding and alert. I loved the way he chewed the corner of his lip when he looked like he had something to say. It was the only expression he really let on other than a few occasional glares or a knowing smirks.

?I?ve gotten use to your presence.?

Oh, charming. That deserves a ten on romantic. I felt my gut long for a dramatic moment. For him to grab me in a passionate kiss, pull me to the ground and make sweet love. And after, he would hold me and whisper sweet nothings until the sun rose. But that?s the problem right there. Heero was too logical to speak of sweet nothings.

The coffee announced it?s finishing. I looked down at the empty coke bottle and decided I had enough caffeine. Heero didn?t give any signs of moving either. Instead, we both sat there, waiting. The cab driver was to be here any moment to take me to the airport. I didn?t ask him to come along, and he didn?t offer.

He did, however, surprised me by getting up out of bed to say goodbye. He wasn?t suppose to know but Hilde had blurted it to Duo and thus to him. Ah, the sweet chain of gossip.

He pushed himself off the wall catching my attention fully. ?Relena,? he paused, glancing away from my stare. It was one of the few moments Heero ever showed insecurity. I would have questioned it, asked him what he was feeling, but I couldn?t hear my own sensing over the breaking of my heart. ?I want you here.? And thus, the final peace shattered. Shouldn?t there be a guaranteed on this type of thing?

My mind screamed, my body ached, and my eyes glazed over. ?It?s too late for that.?

He shoved his hands into his pocket and sat down next to me on the poor suitcase. ?Why??

?Your getting your emotions confused. You want me here because you don?t like change.?

?It was ?change? when you came here in the first place.?

?Since when do you start speaking sentences??

?Since I have the feeling that I?m losing you.?

I closed my eyes briefly and felt the pain settle. ?You never had me in the first place.? My own voice seemed so dead. When had I become this shallow? When did I let someone else, more specifically a man keep me from my own morals? Morals that men shouldn?t have any control over how I feel. I have the right to my own emotions.

Yet one look at him and all that control, all those rights, shatter; leaving me just a girl, with a crush, and an empty coke bottle.

?Stay,? his voice barely brushed a whisper with a sense of struggle in himself. Looking up I saw pain evident. Maybe deep down he really did want me to stay.

Maybe deep down I wanted to stay too.

?Relena.? I could feel his breath on my neck, reminding me when the day is dead, and there is just me, and him in his bed. He?s never close to me, instead, I wrap my arms around myself and watch his chest rise and fall and then rise back up only fall once again. Despite the fact of the cold situation, his warm breath spans across my neck, my collar bone and finally to my heart where I can?t stop myself from reaching over and taking his lips with mine. ?Relena.?

I dropped the coke bottle, ignoring the shatter. Blinking, I look back at him with the hard kitchen tile below me and his arm against mine. ?Huh?? It wasn?t until that moment that I noticed the rain beating across the window- beating across my mind. ?I can?t stay.?

Heero wasn?t one to beg. I heard the cab outside give it?s announcing honk. I started to stand but Heero?s hand took mine, pulling me down into a hard kiss that wasn?t so hard at all. Soft pain. I smiled against his lips and whispered something to do with love.

The door.

A small smile goodbye.

Regrets unsaid.

Four am.






***
This story and b r o k e n both have the same theme and plot (almost). I had the idea in my head and wrote both stories at different times. I'd like to know which one you prefered more and why- so I know if I should carry one on or not.

[wicked]

I like both fic's. If you can, I'd say continue both. But that's just me.

But if I really wanted to be honest with myself, b r o k e n seems to have the ability to naturally progress into something more.

Both are beautifully written.

~Wicked Child

[Tsukiyo]

WElll....Heero is pissing me off so much in this one. I feel like he deserves several swift kicks to the @$$.
I, in my general need to see Heero and Relena living happily together, prefer b r o k e n. At least Heero feels terrible about what he's done. What can I say? Misery loves company.
But still I think you should continue both fics. To me, while they both deal with a distance in the relationship between Heero and Relena, it seems that the stories take that issue in different directions. I see b r o k e n, based purely on what's been written because I don't know what's going on in your creative brain, as progressing into a story about a re-development of Heero and Relena's relationship. And I see Say I Do as focusing more on Relena developing as a person in light of her relationship issues, more than as a fic about her and Heero's relationship (or lack there of).
Of course regardless of which you choose, I'm sure the fic(s) will be great. I say take both of them and run with them, in which ever direction they go.

~Tsukiyo