The Way of Love
Chapter 2
By Zapenstap
Sunlight slanted down through the forested trail, lighting the road through the trees with dapples of soft yellow light. Tohru walked with her arms around the grocery bag, clasping it tightly to her chest with both hands. She could hardly see over the top of the bag and walked carefully, peering frantically from side to side, around the bottom edges of the bag and over the rim in a desperate attempt to avoid slamming into anything.
?Oh? I really hope I don?t trip,? she said aloud to herself. She fretted and wobbled and shifted her burden. When her toes got caught in a pothole she swayed and then straightened and kept walking, still holding the bag securely, her expression settling into her determined face with a matching will.
When Shigure?s house appeared through the trees she walked more confidently, her feet finding their way on the familiar path through the yard. She smiled to herself with simple delight at seeing that elegant porch and the open doors that warmed her heart with thoughts of home and comfort and feelings she couldn?t quite name. The world always gleamed with light and color wherever you looked, she told herself, if you allowed yourself to see. Tohru?s heart bubbled with joy at the clear blue sky stretching above the treetops, the twittering birds bleating their hearts out in the branches, the eye-assaulting colors in the grass and the flowers and the bark of the trees. It was a beautiful world, so full of life and goodness, and so much more wonderful if every human soul could perceive it that way, with hope during the hard times. So mom had said, but though mom was gone, Tohru was alive, and she carried the torch onward with every bit of her determined will.
Tohru?s heart lifted again when she caught sight of Kyo coming around the corner of the house. ?Kyo,? she said with a smile that sang from her heart, not with a struggle, but with genuine happiness. ?It?s so kind of you to meet me. I??
Kyo?s face revealed little emotion, but she caught the tension of his feelings and trailed off in puzzlement. ?Here,? he said, closing in on her and invading her space with helping hands. ?Let me carry that for you before you trip on a rock and smash the eggs you just bought for us to eat.?
He was depressed. He didn?t look or sound like it, but somehow she could tell. She didn?t ask what it was about though. It wasn?t polite to be so nosy all the time and lately she had been feeling a little intrusive. And she didn?t want to sound negative either. ?Oh, no, no. It?s okay. I can carry it. I carried it all this way. I?m really quite strong. Really.? His eyes glanced at her sideways with one of those evaluation looks that always seemed half scolding and half indulging. His hands brushed against her arms and she loosened her grip automatically. ?Oh, well, okay,? she stumbled, folding her hands over her legs as Kyo shifted the grocery bag to one arm. ?It?s very nice of you to help me, Kyo.?
?Oh stop it already,? he told her. ?I?m not going to let you buy the food, carry it in and cook it too. We can help each other out, you know.?
?Um?right.?
She didn?t know what to say when Kyo was so nice to her. She never knew what to say, because it felt so wonderful to hear so much kindness in his voice, to observe him exerting so much effort to be gentle and helpful. It always made her smile to think of him in his moods, to think of him in his habits, and to witness his attempts to change them. ?But you?ve all done so much for me already,? she added. ?You and Yuki. And Shigure.?
He eyed her again that same way, a little incredulity and reprove mixed with intense fondness and affection. Tohru felt her heart speed up and laughed a little shakily, avoiding those feelings. ?Uh? I mean, er?!? Calming herself, she flushed and formally bent a little at the waist. ?I?m sorry.?
?I said don?t apologize,? he said, turning and walking abruptly away from her with the grocery bag in his arms and his back to her. ?I don?t mind helping you.?
Tohru stared at the spot between his shoulder blades for a moment, noticing the sweat in his orange hair and realizing that he must have been training this afternoon. If he was going to have his own Dojo someday, he had told her when she had asked, he would have to keep practicing, to get better and better, never mind Yuki now. So he got up at five in the morning every day to train and continued in the afternoons sometimes too. Tohru smiled to herself. Some things never changed.
But other things did. The change was like the flow of water, moving sluggishly at first, rinsing away the build up of sludge, and then flowing faster and faster until the current felt a little dangerous to those not used to swimming. Life at the Sohmas now that the curse was broken was?different then it had been. There were changes, changes in the moods of everyone, feelings in the long silences. Yuki and Kyo still avoided one another, but they spent a lot of time staring at nothing, and sometimes even neglected to notice when the other was in the room. She had often seen Yuki thinking on the steps and had noticed that Kyo was more often on the roof, and even Shigure seemed a little off lately, handing Mii his latest manuscript without any fuss. The curse, Tohru understood now, had defined the lives of these people. Believing in it had guided their actions and emotions for so long that it was difficult to let go, even if it had been hurtful to them, even if they had wanted it gone. It was an ailment they had depended on for identification. With the curse came rules and roles to which they practiced pre-formed relationships and pre-determined futures. With all that?expectation gone, life was a little bewildering, a little terrifying, and the some of the problems that they had thought would vanish with its disappearance remained.
?Because life is hard for everybody,? Tohru reminded herself with a smile, tilting her head toward her shoulder. ?Sometimes we just need a little encouragement from the people around us. That?s why it?s so important?to stay together.?
?Eh? Did you say somethin???
Tohru started out of her private thoughts. ?No no! I just?? She lowered her eyes, flustered and not willing to meet Kyo?s eyes. He was watching her, she knew, with that practiced patience he had developed just for her. It made her feel warm and safe and uncomfortable at the same time. To cause so much trouble, to be cared about by someone so much? it was more than she deserved, more than she could allow herself to accept. Particularly because it was Kyo. Kyo and Yuki. ?I know I talk to myself. You must think I?m strange.?
Kyo held up a hand. ?No, it?s okay, really. I?ve heard you do it before.? He looked at her a moment longer, standing so confrontational on the front step, towering over her contrite form. ?You?re so insecure sometimes. It?s not like it bothers me that you think out loud.?
Tohru looked up at Kyo with wide open eyes that could not hide her feelings. Kyo flushed, and turned red, and scratched behind his head with his free hand. ?Well, you know? Look, forget I said anything. Let?s just?go inside.? Turning, he trotted up the steps and disappeared into the house.
Tohru waited on the porch, frozen by her emotions, a shimmering warmth in her stomach that made her feel slightly dizzy. She found herself wondering suddenly where Yuki was. After a minute, she heard sounds of someone returning. Presently, Kyo pushed the door open and stared at her from the frame. The expression on his face was different. It was that worried, concerned look, with the lowered eyebrows and the grim mouth. ?You?re probably wondering,? he said, looking off to the side. ?Even though you haven?t asked yet. Yuki?s in his little garden, probably planting more leeks to choke me. But he wanted to talk to you. I just?thought you should know.?
?Oh. Yuki!? she said thoughtlessly, and smiled with the flush of warmth that flooded her heart, confusing her further. She caught Kyo?s eyes as he glanced at her and shifted her feet under his stare, looking down at the ground as a blush suffused her cheeks. Her insides were all hot and disconcerted. She found her legs strangely shaky, her stomach trembling, and shuffled from foot to foot in confusion. ?I was wondering,? she said, looking down at her hands. ?I haven?t seen him all morning, and not much last night either. I hope he?s feeling okay.? She did, envisioning him in her mind, smiling at her. Thoughts of Yuki pushed out thoughts of Kyo.
?I hope he?s sick,? Kyo intruded into her thoughts abrasively, then added calmly and somewhat strangely, ?but? anyway, he wanted to talk to you.?
Tohru blinked, catching something in the air with the repetition. Something important? The tone of Kyo?s voice was like a whisper of sadness, or regret. ?He? What about??
Kyo looked away, refusing to meet her eyes. ?I don?t know.? But by his tone?
Tohru wanted to ask more as a terrifying wiggle of fear wormed in her heart, but at that moment Shigure suddenly followed Kyo out onto the porch. ?Why, Tohru! I saw the grocery bag on the counter and I thought immediately of you and your glorious cooking! When?s dinner??
Tohru smiled uneasily. ?Uh?well??
?Actually,? Shigure said with over dramatized thoughtfulness, one hand massaging his chin. ?Now that I think about it, Yuki told me he wanted to have a talk with you at the secret base when you came home.? He beamed a smile at her. ?So I guess I?ll just have Kyo make us dinner!?
Kyo?s rage was barely contained in his affronting, threatening posture. ?Make it yourself!?
?Now, you really don?t want me to do that, Kyo. You?ll have to eat it too.? Nothing phased Shigure?s smile as he flapped at Tohru with one hand. ?You go have a talk with Yuki, Tohru. Don?t worry about us. He told me he wanted to tell you himself. It?s such a difficult thing for him, you know. We?re so proud of him.?
?I?m not!? Kyo shouted loudly in Shigure?s ear.
?Oh, Kyo, not so loud!?
Tohru?s eyes drew low in puzzlement. ?Um?okay.?
Shigure folded his arms in his sleeves and walked back into the house. Kyo remained, watching her with such an expression on his face that Tohru felt her heart breaking. And yet?Yuki. She worried, and fretted, and at last turned away, her heart pounding in her stomach and in her ears as her feet marked the way toward the base in a line that gradually became more and more unsteady. Kyo. Yuki. Kyo. Yuki. Kyo. The face in her mind alternated as she remembered each and every moment she had shared with either of them. She hoped everything was okay. She hoped that even now she wouldn?t have to?
Oh, mom.
?Miss Honda.?
Tohru stopped, folding her hands demurely in front of her. Yuki sat on a log by the edge of the woods just a few feet away from the garden. His eyes drew her in with a luminescent glow, his skin pale, but healthy in the sunlight. He smiled and she smiled, so happy to see him smiling, so thankful that there was so much goodness in Yuki to smile about. He sat with a princely countenance, a graceful posture that seemed elegant even in how casually he sat with his legs extended, and appeared chic even with the unbuttoned shirtsleeves, unevenly cut hair and a garden glove on his right hand. He removed the glove when she approached, and smiled up at her with gentle, mysterious charm glowing from beautiful, expressive eyes.
?Hi, Yuki. How are you??
?Miss Honda. Would you sit with me a moment? I have?something I?d like to say to you.?
*****
Kyo watched Tohru walk away until he couldn?t see her anymore. She started at a leisurely pace, feet shuffling forward, but then she sped up, taking longer strides. As her strides quickened he felt her worrying, even from a distance. He leaned his head against the doorframe and prayed she wouldn?t turn around. If she did? if she did, he would be flustered, and be forced to explain, to make up something to explain why he was watching her walk away. But he wanted to watch her.
?Are you worried??
Kyo started, tensing and cringing from the sound of Shigure?s voice just behind his head. ?What are you doing sneaking up on me like that?? he demanded, stepping back for space. ?What is it that makes you think you can just butt into everybody?s business??
Shigure stood with his arms in his sleeves, smiling angelically. ?Oh, just the habit of a lonesome writer, I suppose.? He opened his eyes and gave Kyo a more meaningful look. ?You didn?t answer my question. Are you worried??
Kyo slumped a little. ?About what?? he mumbled, gaze sliding away from Shigure. ?What am I supposed to be worried about??
?What will you do?? Shigure asked. ?If she goes with him??
?I don?t know what you?re talking about.? Kyo hoped the Dog?no, just Shigure?would just drop it. He didn?t want to talk about it.
?I?m talking about Tohru and Yuki,? Shigure plowed on.
Kyo didn?t answer. If Yuki asked Tohru and she went with him, chose him? Nothing. He wouldn?t do anything.
Shigure watched him silently, trying to get a look at his eyes underneath the stray locks of orange hair. Kyo didn?t turn his head to help him out. At length, Shigure let out a quiet, serious sigh, and asked a simple question. ?Do you love Tohru? Kyo??
?That?s none of your business!? he snapped. ?Leave me alone!?
Shigure waved his hand in front of him defensively. ?I don?t mean to interfere??
?Like hell you don?t!?
Shigure continued to smile until Kyo?s rage began to dissipate from pure lack of fuel.
Tired of fighting, of trying so hard, Kyo slumped against the wall and slowly sat, sliding to the ground. ?It doesn?t matter anyway,? he said, looking out at the trees that Tohru had passed through, keeping up pretenses. ?I just?I just don?t want her to be unhappy, or worried about anything. So, I?m fine. Really. You can tell her so if she asks. It?s not a big deal. It?s just?an infatuation.?
?If you say so,? Shigure said, and stepped back into the house.
Kyo put his chin on his knees and tried to quell the queasiness in his stomach.
*****
Yuki took a deep breath as Tohru approached him, watching her slim figure move with a little awkward shuffle toward the log he sat on. When he beckoned she sat smoothly, as gracefully as a princess, except for the stiffness in her arms and the smile on her face that looked a little forced. She was happy to see him, of course, but there was a slight crease of worry in her brow and specks of panic in her eyes. He noted them with sadness, and a heavy sense of duty.
?Miss Honda,? he said again, and lowered his own gaze, unsure even now how to begin. The hours he had spent going over this were not enough. He wanted to be understood, and it helped that she was so good at understanding, but this was so difficult to say. Her first name still came to his lips with great difficulty, though he had tried countless times to address her intimately, ever since he first got to know her. The safe, polite way was just so much easier for him that whenever her first name came to his lips, he swallowed the whisper before it could escape.
?Yu?Yuki,? Tohru said, fingers tangling in her lap. ?Kyo said you wanted to talk to me.?
Yuki started, looking up at her face with genuine, open-mouthed surprise. ?Kyo??
He saw her stiffen. ?Well, um? Shigure said something too. I don?t know why I said Kyo. I guess I?m just nervous.?
He smiled and took one of her hands, unknotting it from the other. ?You don?t have to be nervous,? he said. ?What I have to tell you is important, but I don?t ever want you to feel nervous around me. I want you to be able to tell me anything, just like I can tell you all of my thoughts.?
It was her turn to look at him, following her own arm from her elbow to her wrist, to the fingers he gripped lightly in his hand by his face. She stared into his eyes and he smiled again, thinking how wide and innocent and genuine her face was. It was a pretty face when you knew her, a sweet beauty that glowed no matter how her hair was styled or whatever she was wearing. ?You?re a beautiful person, Miss Honda,? he said quietly.
Her stark terror was evident.
When she flinched, he released her hand. ?I feel like I can say that to you,? he said. ?And I know that you?re going to deny it, but, it?s true.?
?Oh no! I?m really nothing special,? she said hurriedly. ?You, Yuki, on the other hand, are really beautiful, really. Oh, but that probably doesn?t help you! I guess I was just thinking that it?s not like I have my own fan club. Not that you like having one either, I guess. Oh, I?m doing this all wrong. What I mean to say is that I don?t have any admirers the way you do. I?m just??
Yuki exhaled a small laugh. She stopped when she heard the sound, looking at him with blinking eyes and slight tremble. He smiled at her reassuringly. ?You do,? he said. ?My whole family adores you, and? you also have admirers.?
He knew he had hit a spot because she stopped speaking, and the gradual change of color in her face told him just how much she knew that he was telling the truth. Did it hurt her, or make her feel uncomfortable, to be liked? She wouldn?t meet his eyes. She stared at the ground before her toes and by her expression he knew she was thinking and feeling too much to be able to sort out a response.
?Miss Honda,? he said. ?I asked you out here because I need to tell you something, something that?s been heavy on my heart for a long while.?
She didn?t speak. It was like she couldn?t, but he knew her well enough to know that she was listening.
?I?ve waited until the very last minute,? he continued, ?hoping for?I guess I don?t know really. The decision to speak with you has always been mine. But it was so difficult that I just couldn?t do it until I had to. So please just listen to me. Miss Honda, ever since I?ve met you I felt like I?ve been becoming a stronger person. It might be hard for you to understand, but before meeting you I was sometimes?contemptuous of other people and lonely at the same time. I knew that I was better than other people at so many things, and yet I couldn?t express myself, or act like I really felt, so I felt estranged from them. But the way you have been so receptive to my feelings and so encouraging to my decisions has helped me believe in myself. Because of you, I want to be a better person; someone who really is like the prince everybody calls me.?
?You are,? she whispered, so quietly he could barely hear her. ?I?ve always thought you were very like a prince, in a different way then other people think, a better way.?
He stopped, staring at her with amazement and wondering why he should still be amazed by her. Then he smiled. ?Only around you,? he told her. ?But not most of the time. The way I treat Kyo? that?s how I really feel around most people. Kyo just allows me to feel that way openly, because I?m supposed to hate him, or I was. Don?t you see, Miss Honda? It?s all an act. Or?it was until I met you. But I?ve changed. I think I?m becoming the person I always pretended to be, and I don?t dislike it, not if you approve.?
Tohru?s shoulders slumped a little, and he stared, leaning down to see if she was all right. Then he heard her sniffling, a quiet weeping that smote him softly in the breast. ?Miss Honda??
When he reached to touch her shoulder, she turned her head to look at him, dashing tears from her eyes. ?Oh, Yuki. I don?t know what to do?? Her hands covered her face and she began to cry, shoulders shaking lightly.
?Don?t?don?t cry,? he said. He wished he could put his arms around her, but he was afraid of that kind of closeness. He had never held her before, not while he was cursed certainly and he couldn?t bring himself to after. His hands hovered over her, aching to pull her close but too trained to keep distance for his brain and body to allow it. Her tears smote him in the chest and he fumbled for his thoughts. ?Whatever I did, Miss Honda, whatever I said, I?m sorry. Please, don?t cry anymore. I can?t stand it. I?ve been terribly selfish. I know I have. But I love you with all my heart and I can?t bear to see you cry like this, not over me. Please, you mustn?t cry??
If anything, she wept harder. He saw her trying to stifle her sobs, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands, and choked on his own voice, hating himself for hurting and confusing her. And when she finally spoke, gasping between cries, he heard blaming herself and it was all he could do to listen. ?Yuki, I?m so sorry! I?m so, so sorry. I can?t choose. I can?t! I don?t know what to do. I?ve thought so long and hard about it, really I have, but this one thing is just too difficult for me. Whenever I think about it it?s just too much. You shouldn?t love me at all. There?s no reason that someone like you should care about someone like me even as much as you have already. Can?t we just go back to the way it was, to being friends, and living together, and helping each other??
He was surprised to feel tears in his own eyes, just the barest shimmer of regret that came as he watched her weep, her face still covered by her hands. Reaching out, he touched her hands, guiding them away from her face. ?But Miss Honda, I do want that. It doesn?t have to be another way. I?ve come to understand that love works things out for itself. Please, just listen to me.?
Her sniffles stopped, turning to hiccoughs as her tears dried up. She sat beside him slouched over, her eyes red-rimmed and glistening with the tears she had shed. She still covered her mouth with one hand, but slowly she drew it away, swallowed once, and sat very still.
Yuki watched her. The nervousness he had felt was gone. The worst, he felt, was over now. He had tried to be tactful and avoid hurting her, but having hurt her a little anyway, he was ready now to tell her everything. From here on he just had to explain, to reassure her, and, he hoped, make her happy again, make her smile again. ?Miss Honda,? he said gently, ?I?ve loved you for a long time, and I?ve wanted to be with you too, because of all the things I?ve said already. You inspire me to be a better person and I?ve never been able to care for others the way you do until I learned it from you. You have helped me to use my voice and decide things for myself. Because of all that you have done for me, and because of who you are, I want you to be with me always, but you don?t have to cry...?
Tohru lifted her head, staring at him with eyes like pools of water, glimmering faintly with love and trust and hope.
Yuki smiled at her fondly. ??because I?m not going to ask you to choose anything. I could never do that. Rather, I?ve come to realize that the nature of the relationship I want is not what I thought I wanted for so long. Miss Honda, you are truly the most beautiful person I have ever known, and it?s true that I brought you out here today to tell you that I love you, but I also asked you to come out here today because I have to say goodbye.?
Puzzlement crossed her features, an expression he saw often on her, but not with such consternation and affection. ?Yuki?? she asked. Her voice was so quiet, and yet the two mere syllables uttering his name managed to express all her feelings.
?I?m going to a university,? he told her, ?across the country, on my scholarship and my own savings. I?m doing it, in part, Miss Honda, because you encouraged me to.?
Light sparkled in her eyes. She sat straighter, seemingly forgetting all her tears and cries as a smile spread across her face. ?Oh, Yuki! That?s wonderful! But why haven?t you said anything? I mean, you must have known for a long time, right??
His return smile was languid in comparison, but the affection in his heart stirred. Reaching out, he curled a tendril of her dark hair about his fingers. Her smile slackened a little, and she swallowed, reminded again of the significance of this discussion, but her eyes remained bright, waiting for his response. ?I?ve known,? he told her, ?but I wasn?t sure I could do it, partly because of the curse, and after that because I didn?t know how I felt about you, and how you felt about me. But I?ve been watching things, and I delayed in telling you, hoping to go on with the way things were forever, but change has caught up with me. I?ve realized, slowly, that the way I love you isn?t as a lover, Miss Honda. The way I need you is different than the way?? He paused with a sense of regret, unable still to form his thoughts comfortably around that idea. ?Listen, Miss Honda, I don?t ever want you to be lonely or sad, and I know that you don?t want me to be lonely or sad either. And that is the reason that there has been this delay. I was selfish, and even though I knew my feelings were inadequate, for awhile I still wanted you to choose me, because I wanted to love you more, and I wanted you to love me more. I felt that I needed that love from you, that preference. But now I realize that that was wrong of me, because I will never stop loving you the way I do, nor you me, and it?s unfair, even cruel, to make you believe that it has to be any other way.?
?I?? She faltered, looking down.
He understood. ?You didn?t want to choose, Miss Honda, to risk hurting one of us. You are not capable of breaking anyone?s heart and it was beyond you to be so selfish. What I?m telling you is that you don?t have to be selfish. I am always going to be here for you, and we will always be together. I can?t claim that my heart isn?t sad by this decision I have made, but I know that it is the right decision. I just?didn?t see for so long what was going on. Because, as I have said, I was selfish, and contemptuous of other people, and because you are such a good person you couldn?t risk hurting me, even if it was just my pride. I?ve always expected to get the best of everything, but in this case, I still feel like I have, because I want from you for all of my life is friendship. Miss Honda, what I?m saying is that you don?t love me.?
Tohru stared up at him, her eyes wide and full and her heart on her sleeve. ?But I do love you, Yuki,? she
whispered, and there were tears again, welling up in her eyes. ?I really really do. And I can?t choose, but you don?t have to do this. You don?t have to be so noble.?
She didn?t understand, he realized. She had resisted coming to terms with his feelings for her for so long, that once she accepted they had ever been there it was equally hard to let them go. He knew that it wasn?t noble what he was doing, for himself or anyone else, nor was it sacrificial, but Tohru only wanted the best for everyone. She didn?t understand that she wasn?t hurting him by not choosing him. Perhaps she herself didn?t understand how she felt about him, not after deliberately confusing herself about it for so long. He knew, though; he had known for awhile.
?It?s not like that, Miss Honda,? he told her, but when her expression didn?t vary, he smiled. ?Perhaps,? he whispered, ?some things can?t be explained. Perhaps? they have to be shown. If you will allow me??
She didn?t have time to prepare. Tilting her chin with his hand, he leaned in softly, feeling her tremble. Her eyes glimmered with the tears she had shed before, but she didn?t move, remaining still and balanced as he kissed her, his lips touching hers in a kiss that was pure and slow and mild as milk, his fingertips just barely touching her face. When his mouth met hers, she relaxed, the stiffness easing from her shoulders and the air exhaling from her lungs. Then he backed off, looking into her eyes, her tears gone, and whispered softly, ?see??
She stared at him, mouth partly open, and he could see the understanding come into her eyes. The change in her expression altered their relationship forever, and Yuki smiled, because it was what he had meant. His kiss was not a lover?s kiss, and they both knew it, because it couldn?t be. And now their relationship was changed, and he could smile, because it was to both of their satisfaction.
He sat back, wrapping his arms around one knee, relaxing as he let go of the fears he had held close for so long. Turning his head, he smiled at her. ?Neither of us has anything to worry about,? he explained, ?because I know now that no matter what other decisions you may make, you will always love me as you always have.?
She smiled at him, a sad, but sweet smile. ?I will, Yuki. I always will. But,? she looked down. ?I?m going to miss you, more than anything. You?ll be away for so long. How can I be sure you won?t forget me??
Miss him. He would miss her, and everything about home, and something in his heart cried at the thought of the lonely uncertainty that stretched out before him. He wished he could hold her even now, to let her know that he was scared in some ways, that he needed comfort and well-wishing, but he thought it was more important to reassure her.
?I never could,? he told her, and that was certainly the truth. ?There are a lot of challenges facing me. I?ll need your help to get through them, so you should expect to hear from me. And?if you ever need anything, I will be there for you. You can talk to me, about anything, no matter what.? She was smiling, but he swallowed. It was his turn to look away, and he knew that it was finally time to come to terms with what he had been avoiding, because it was time to come to terms with everything. ?And Miss Honda,? he said, narrowing his eyes. ?If that stupid Cat ever gives you any trouble, any at all, you just?let me know. Because I will be there to set him straight, but I?I want you to be happy.?
He forced himself to look at her and was surprised at how he felt when he did. She stared at him, eyes wide with surprise, and gratitude, and tumult of emotions he could scarcely comprehend, but hoped that he would also feel himself one day, for someone special, someone who was like him in some ways and the compensation that he needed in others. He looked at Tohru Honda and felt his heart fill up. He realized suddenly that it was worth it, that it was all worth it, for what he gained, and lost, and given, because he saw now that she was really and truly happy. And he was happy. And it was love, in all its various forms and ways and changes that had made all of this possible.
He only wished he didn?t feel like he was leaving a place that finally had all the warmth and comfort he had dreamed for it to have for a place he didn?t know at all. And he wished he could have said goodbye longer, and feel better about it, but he knew that Tohru had some place else to be now. He saw it in the distraction in her eyes.
?The last I saw him,? Yuki said with a heavy sigh, ?was in the yard.?
TBC
All right, so that?s part two. Yuki spent so much time beating around the bush (he?s trying to be sensitive) that I hope this chapter made sense. If it didn?t it will in the next part! This part is even a bit longer than I wanted it to be, but sometimes that just happens. I would like to thank anybody who read the first part and reviewed to encourage me. It is my first Fruits Basket fic. I know it?s not terribly plot-oriented, but I?m cooking up one of those too ^_^. This story deals mostly with K/T/Y and a little Shigure, but I love all the characters and I would like to write a fic involving and analyzing all of them, particularly Akito. Anyway, thank you all so much for reading this story. I really appreciate it! Please review this chapter!
