Love Me or Leave Me Alone (2/5)

Loyce's fanfiction! :)

Moderator: Loyce

Post Reply
Loyce
Easy like Easy Mac n cheese
Posts: 59
Joined: Mon Oct 07, 2002 5:37 pm
Location: Under 'L' in Heidi Fleiss's little black book... or so I'm told

Love Me or Leave Me Alone (2/5)

Post by Loyce »

Before I head up the East Coast, and brave the 30"+ of snow that fell at my parents house, I thought I'd post the next part in case I never make it back... Since, my flight has been cancelled two times already.

Wish me and Alison luck!!

Disclaimer: I don?t know Gundam Wing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Love Me or Leave Me Alone
Part Two
By Loyce
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The dark black limo sped through the morning traffic, but its precious cargo seemed unaware of how fast the vehicle was actually moving. Relena reclined deep into the leather interior, allowing her head to fall back against the headrest. Against her will, her eyes kept slipping closed, sleep desperate to take control of her wary body. Every time she felt her head begin to fall forward, she would jerk up, blinking a couple of time to clear the confusion. 'I've got to keep myself awake.' Reaching over, she grabbed the remote control and turned on the small TV. Idly flipping through the channels, her mind wandered back to the one thing that she was trying to avoid. Heero Yuy. Night or day, he somehow always managed to intrude on her thoughts. There were times when she would go an entire day without thinking about him, but as night fell and the stars appeared, so did thoughts of him. But after last night, how could she ever be able to not get through a minute of the day without remember some part of their night together and how he left her in the morning? And that's when she came to a conclusion. 'Love must have become a crime because I'm surely being punished.'

The limo came to a bone-jarring stop, the brakes squealing in protest. Relena felt the safety belt catch as her body was thrown forward by sheer momentum. If it hadn't been for the seatbelt, she would have found herself a jumbled mess of tangled limbs on the floor. Dazed, she rubbed the side of her head, trying to stem the headache that was already beginning to form behind her eyes. The passenger side door was suddenly thrown up, the sunlight streaming directly into her eyes. Holding up her hand and wincing slightly, she grabbed her briefcase and climbed from the limo.

"Um...Thank you, Geoffrey." She replied to her driver, her eyebrows pulled together in an apprehensive look. Geoffrey cleared his throat and answered, "You have a meeting in five minutes, Miss Foreign Minister." Relena's eyes widened as she quickly turned toward the ESUN building and ran as fast as her sandals would allow.

Once inside the building, she made her way toward the elevator lobby, only to find the elevator doors closing as she rounded the corner. Groaning in frustration, she looked toward the door leading to the stairwell. With a deep breath, she held the briefcase tightly against her chest and sprinted toward the door.

The sound of her feet hitting the stairs echoed throughout the stairwell. She tried to keep her breathing a deep and even as she possibly could as she passed the second floor. A small sheen of sweat appeared at her hairline as she made her way to the fifth floor. By the time she reached the eighth and final floor, her body was screaming in protest. As she pushed the heavy metal door open, she kept thinking to herself, 'Please just let me make it to the conference room before I collapse.'

Lifting her gaze from the floor as she tried to catch her breath, she noticed a highly angry God of Death making his way toward her, with his eyes slightly narrowed.

"Duo?"

He stopped directly in front of her, grabbed her briefcase and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Don't you ever, ever, do that to me again!"

Relena felt like a child being scolded as she continued to stare at Duo with a puzzled look on her face. Something didn't seem right, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

"You're supposed to wait for someone to escort you into the building." Moving beside her, he guided her down the hallway toward the conference room. "Damn, you scared about 10 years off my life. I would have lost my life if I had to call Heero..."

The rest of Duo's ramblings faded into the back ground as the light bulb went off in her head. That's what was wrong. It was Heero's turn on her shift, not Duo's. She shook her head and interrupted him in mid sentence. "Duo, where's Heero?"

Her question caught him completely off guard and he felt falter as they continued down the corridor. "Heero called me this morning. He's been pulled to work on another assignment." Duo stifled a yawn he added, "He asked me to pick up his morning shift."

'Another assignment? Another assignment.' Relena found herself pulled between out right rage and complete sorrow. 'He was hiding, again. Just like he had done many times before.'

"Relena, did I do something to tick you off?"

Realizing she had been glaring at the wrong person, she rubbed her temples. "I'm sorry, Duo, I had a long night and didn't get much sleep." She flashed him a polite smile, as she opened the door to the conference room. 'That wasn't a lie, just not the whole truth.'

"I'll be here waiting outside to escort you back as soon as the meeting is over." Duo called to her before she shut the door. Sighing, he moved to the hard wooden chair posted next to the only entrance to the conference room. He glanced back over his shoulder and stared at the door for a couple of seconds. Something was going on between those two again. The sadness in her eyes was back. Duo felt his hand form into a fist as he realized that he had been played the fool and pulled into the middle of a 'lovers' quarrel. 'Heero's going to pay for this one.'

****************

Relena tapped the eraser of her pencil on the yellow pad of paper on the table in front of her. Her gaze was focused outside of the window, watching the clouds as the rolled across the blue sky. Though her body sat in a room with high political officials, her mind was elsewhere. For someone who promoted peace, she wasn't thinking of any 'complacent' ways to deal with Heero Yuy. 'I'm tired of the run around. He either loves me or he doesn't. I think it's time that I found out.'

"Relena?"

The elderly voice of President Whitmore pulled her from her non-pacifist thoughts. Relena glanced down at her note pad, finding various drawings and marks of sheer boredom donning the yellow paper. Leaning forward, she folded her arms over the pad and turned toward the head of the table. "I'm sorry Mr. President. What was it you were saying?"

Whitmore sighed and slightly shook his head. His Foreign Minister had been so lost, staring out the window through out the entire meeting that he had to make sure that the correspondent would send her a copy of the minutes as soon as possible.

"We are waiting for your vote on the proposal."

"I'd like to hear more about the proposal before I make my decision."

Vice President Anderson looked completely taken back by her remark. "But Foreign Minister, we're voting on *your* proposal."

Relena could feel the awkward stares of the other members of the room bearing down on her. Pushing her shoulders back, hoping that her cheeks held no sign of embarrassment, she replied, "Then, I'm for it."

Whitmore and Anderson exchanged a quick glance before returning to the vote. Relena let out a deep breath and sunk back into the cushions of the chair. Now her thoughts were taking her away from her job. As the finally vote was tallied, giving Relena's proposal the green light, she came to a decision.

****************

"I know, but Hilde, please?"

"Don't give me those puppy eyes, Maxwell."

Duo didn't pay any attention to her empty threat and turned the full force of his violet eyes on her.

"Damnit!" Hilde threw her hands up in the air. "I can't win against those eyes, and you know it." She huffed loudly, blowing a stray lock of her dark hair out of her face. "All right, I'll be there in 15 minutes with your lunch. Should I grab something for Relena?"

"It probably wouldn't hurt, I doubt she grabbed anything to eat this morning."

Hilde tilted her head to the side as she regarded the tone of Duo's voice. "Duo, what's wrong?"

"Something's up between Heero and Relena. And somehow, I managed to get dragged into the middle of it." Duo sighed and let his head fall gently against the wall behind him. "She was really upset this morning when she found out that I had taken his shift."

"Do you want me to talk to her when I stop by?"

Duo smiled at the genuine concern in his girlfriend's voice. "Nah, you know that she'll clam up and won't say a thing. Best to let her tell us in her own time." Duo looked away from the portable COM link. "Hey, babe, the meeting's over. Catch you in a few?"

A sly smile played at the corners of Hilde's lips. "If you're lucky. Love you."

"Love you too, babe. Be careful." Duo watched the connection break before closing up the device and stuffing it in his pocket. Pushing out of the hardback chair, he moved closer to the door. He leaned carelessly against the wall watching the delegates emerge from the conference room, his eyes searching for Relena in the crowd. The tiny hairs on the back of his neck began to rise when she didn't make in out of the room with the rest of the group. Leaning to the side, he peeked into the room and found her standing with President Whitmore.

"Relena, are you sure you're up to this tour coming up? You seemed to be somewhere else during the meeting."

Relena laid a reassuring hand on the elderly man's shoulder. "It's nothing to worry about. I just need a good night's rest. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to prepare some reports for my trip." She quietly walked over to the table and retrieved her papers and briefcase. Duo stepped into the room, as she was locking the latches on her the case.

"Ready to get moving, Princess?" He watched as she swept the briefcase off the table and began moving out the door. Duo kept glancing at her out of the corner of his eye as they made their way down the hall and toward her office. Silence followed them, seeming to always be a step in front of them. As they got closer to her office door, Duo tried to find something to say, only to find himself at a complete loss for words. He grabbed hold of the doorknob and pushed the door open.

"Good morning, Minister Darlian."

Relena glanced up from the floor and looked into worried face of her secretary. "Good morning, Felicia. Any messages?"

Felicia reached down and picked up a tiny stack of pink notes. "The delegate from M-13 called, reconfirming your visit. Ned Jamison called again wondering when you're going to do an interview with him." Felicia watched as Relena rolled her eyes. "And finally, your brother called; he'll call you back when they land."

Handing Relena the messages, Felicia looked over toward Duo and sent him a questioning look to which Duo replied with a shrug.

"Thank you, Felicia." Turning from her secretary and her bodyguard, she moved into her office, slamming the door behind her. When the glass in the door stopped rattling, Felicia turned and faced Duo.

"What did you do this time?" She glared at him, her hands resting on her hips.

"Me? Why does everyone always think *I've* done something wrong?"

Felicia couldn't help but giggle at the outraged look on his face. "Well, you are known to have 'foot-in-mouth' disease from time to time."

Duo turned his chin up toward the ceiling and closed his eyes. "I've done nothing of the sort."

"Maybe not this time, but you've done your fair share, Maxwell."

Duo and Felicia swung their attention toward the door to find Hilde leaning against the door jam, dangling two white plastic bags from her outstretched fingers. She pushed away from the door and strode towards Felicia's desk.

The smell of food drifted into the tiny office and Duo sighed. "Babe, have I told you lately that I love you?"

"Not since you asked me to bring you lunch." Hilde continued to pull the containers out of the bags, handing Felicia her normal meal. She set aside a white foam container with 'Duo' written on it, before grabbing for the one labeled for Relena. Holding it out to Duo, she said, "Sorry, sweetie, but I can't stay. I got a call on the way here, Une's having problems with the computer system." She stood on the tips of her toes and gave him a quick kiss. "Before you can eat, you have to make sure that Relena gets her lunch."

Duo took it out of her hands. "All right. See you later tonight?"

"Only if I can debug the system in record time." Hilde waved as she sprinted out the door.

Felicia looked up from her turkey club and shook her head. "That girl's too good for you. How did she ever get mixed up with the likes of you?"

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Duo rolled his eyes at her comment and made his way toward Relena's door. He knocked twice against the wooden frame before letting himself into her office. He stopped just inside the doorway and stared at her.

Relena had her back to him, her shoulders somewhat slumped forward. She was leaning against the windowpane with the side of her face resting against the cool glass. The room was silent except for the occasional sound of a deep sigh. Duo surveyed the room noting that her briefcase had been dumped in the middle of the floor; she had removed her sandals and the phone jack had been unplugged.

Not sure how to approach the situation, he loudly cleared his throat, hoping to draw her attention. Slowly, Relena opened her eyes and moved her head so she was able to see him standing near the door. She had the same look in her eyes that had been there earlier before she entered the conference. If Duo didn't know better, he could have sworn that Heero had been giving her lessons on his famous glare.

Holding out the foam container, Duo felt like he was making a peace offering. "Hilde just came by with lunch. She picked you up some grilled chicken salad."

Relena moved away from the window and walked over to Duo. She took the container out of his hands and placed it on the desk behind her. "Thank you, Duo." Keeping her back to him, she tried to regain some of the composure she had lost the moment she had some privacy.

Duo continued to stare at her back and he could feel the overwhelming urge to plant his fist in Heero's face growing by the second. He reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder. "Relena."

She whipped around quickly and he could see the tell tale signs that she had been crying. Her normal clear aquamarine eyes were dull and hidden behind a slight sheen of tears. The edges of her eyes were red and puffy; the sleeve of her blouse was slightly damp.

"Don't worry about me, Duo. I've handled worse things in my life than being rejected..." Her voice faltered before she could finish the rest of the sentence. She dropped her head to her chest and took a couple of deep breaths. Squaring her shoulders, she brought her head back up and looked directly into his eyes. "Tell, Hilde I said thank you for lunch. I'll have to even up with her after I get back from my tour." Relena rounded the desk and placed her hands on the high backed leather chair. She smiled back at Duo. "I need to get some of these things off my desk before I head out in the morning."

He knew that he was being dismissed, but Duo didn't want to leave her in her present state of mind. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he leaned back on his heels. "Well, then, I guess I better leave you to your work." They stared at each other for a moment before Duo turned to leave the room. He paused at the door and looked back over his shoulder. "You know, I'm right outside this door if you need me."

Relena caught the double meaning in his simple statement. As she collapsed into the chair, she answered him back. "I know, Duo."

Reluctantly, Duo pulled the door closed behind him. Felicia gave him the 'you-better-tell-me-everything' look from her desk as he walked over to pick up his lunch. He moved back to his post by Relena's office door, and opened the container; the smell of food assaulting his nose. Sighing, he realized that he no longer had an appetite.

Back in the office, Relena tossed the untouched salad into the trashcan. She willed back the tears that threatened to fall with her anger. "No matter how many times I tell myself I have no more tears to shed for him, I always seem to find another well to draw from," She slammed her fist down on the desk, scattering a pile of treaties and agendas to the carpet in the process. For once, everything was going to take a back seat to her personal life. "But tonight, I'm going to find out what he wants, one way or another."

****************

Heero appreciated the fact that Mother Nature was cooperating with him for a change. The cloud cover blocked out most of the moonlight as he made his way through the rose gardens. Since he had helped Hilde design the security system for the Peacecraft mansion, getting past it hadn't been that difficult.

As he rounded the last corner of the hedges, her bedroom balcony came into view. Although the lights were off, he knew that she was awake. Waiting for him. Heero turned back around and sunk down beside the evergreen hedges. He placed his arms on his knees, and let his head fall into his open hands.

'What exactly am I doing?'

Again, the little voice inside of him remained silent, unwilling to give him any answers. The pang of guilt that he felt after having Duo take over his shift had continued to grow through out the day, and now nearly consumed him. Why couldn't he face her?

Looking over his shoulder, he turned his attention back up to her room. Relena had come to mean so much more to him then he could have ever thought possible. Last night had been proof of that simple fact. Heero thought back to the words that Odin Lowe had spoken to him all those years ago.

'Live by your emotions.'

It sounded so simple enough, and on the battlefield, he had been able to do just that. But why, couldn't he seem to apply that philosophy to his 'normal' life. Pushing off the ground with a disgusted grunt, Heero moved away from the gardens and began making his way towards the back of the mansion.

Meanwhile, Relena sat in the huge plush chair in her room, her knees pulled tightly against her body. Dressed in her satin pajamas, she sat in the darkness, holding her teddy bear, waiting for him to show. She knew that he would come, if not out of love, then guilt. Guilt for what happened between them the previous night. Just the idea of him coming into the room with apologizes written in his deep blue eyes, was enough to her bite her bottom lip in anger. She would never regret making love to him, even if he had done it out of simple human need and nothing else.


After returning from the office, Relena avoided her bedroom as much as possible since it held some many memories. She knew that the room would still carry the faint smell of sex and that the bed would taunt her with its warm sheets and the scent of his body. Instead of heading directly up to her room, Relena went to her study and picked up one of her sappy romance novels and attempted to lose herself within the story. But as she pushed herself through the words, she found her heart didn't want to read about a love come true. Finally giving in, she walked up to her bedroom, like a prisoner being lead to an execution.

So now, here she was, waiting for him to come. She had pulled the chair closer to the sliding glass door of the balcony that way she would be sure to see him. With all the memories of the previous night haunting her, Relena knew that if she confronted him in her room, she didn't know if she could keep herself from faltering. Just the idea of him, standing in her room, caused excited chills up her spine. Swinging her eyes from the bed, she looked outside. The balcony was a neutral zone, a place where she could stand her ground. 'Maybe . . . hopefully.'

The soft click of the doorknob caused her to turn her attention back into her bedroom. She watched as Heero careful closed the bedroom door. Relena pushed out of the chair, her eyes wide in complete shock. He actually came through the door! Frozen to her spot, she watched him come closer, removing his jacket and tossing it onto the bed. His eyes never left her face as he made his way across the carpeted floor. The only sounds in the room came from the erratic way they were breathing.

Heero stopped directly in front of her and found himself drowning in her clear eyes. His lips parted, but everything that he had thought of to say at this moment, everything that he had rehearsed, somehow escaped him. He knew that he had to say something to kill the awkward silence that was growing between them, but his mind seemed to be elsewhere, mainly focused on the bed that laid just to his right.

Biting her bottom lip, Relena waited as patiently as she could for Heero to say something to her. As long as he didn't say 'I'm sorry', she could handle anything he could throw at her. She caught his gaze dart over to the bed and let her own glance in the same direction. Unable to take it anymore, she turned on her heel and marched out onto the balcony, still clutching the teddy bear close to her heart. 'Okay, Relena, keep it together.' She told herself over and over again as she heard him walk out onto the balcony. He stopped in the doorway and didn't come any closer.

"Relena?"

Taking a deep breath, Relena brought her head up and faced him. 'All right, here it goes.'

"Do you know what day it is?"

"April 7, AC 198." Heero stated the date with ease, all the while continuing to stare at her, wondering if she would say the same thing he was thinking. 'Three years to the day that Operation Meteor began, nearly three years since we first met.'

"That's what I thought." Turning her back to him, she braced herself against the cool stone railing of the balcony. Letting her chin rest against her chest, she stared down at the stuffed animal she held and sighed. "I can't do this anymore, Heero."

"What can't you do anymore?"

Relena quickly spun around and hurled the animal at him. The teddy bear landed with a soft thud against the middle of his chest. 'So much for her pacifists' ideals.' He thought as he set the bear down on the patio table.

Shaking her head, she turned her enraged look on him. "I can't live like this anymore, Heero. Sneaking around . . . hell, we aren't even sneaking around, because we don't even have a steady relationship. If you want to call what we have a relationship."

Heero looked down at his feet, trying to figure out how to approach the situation. He knew what she wanted to hear, but he wasn't sure if he would be able to tell her. Sighing, he said, "Relena, I...I protect you."

Relena threw her hands up in the air. "Protect me? You've caused more pain than any assassin's bullet could ever, Heero Yuy. I guess that's what hurts the most. I'm tired of chasing after you, second guessing your motives." Blinking back the tears that threatened to fall, she looked up at the stars. "I need to know, Heero, what am I to you?"

She walked up to him and grabbed a hold of his face. Keeping her eyes focused on his, she asked, "Heero, look at me and tell me if you love me. There is no one around to hear you. Whatever you say will be kept between you, me and the night." A single tear escaped her pleading eyes as she begged him one more time. " Heero, please, tell me."

His mouth opened slightly, but he quickly drew his lips together. Again, Heero reached deep down inside of himself and tried to pull out the emotion that lay in his heart, but he wasn't able to coax it out of its hiding place. His eyes turned away from hers, and in that moment, Relena had his answer.

Silence.

Relena released her hold on him and stepped away. "You're the best at self-defensive, I'd say you've mastered the art. I've been trying to break through the barriers you've but up around your heart..." Sighing, Relena dropped her gaze. "But now, I realize I have been fighting a losing battle. I give up, Heero. You win."

"Relena..."

She didn't have to say anything to him, the tears streaming down her face answered for her. He stared at her for a moment, reached up and tried to touch her. When she backed away from him and wrapped her arms around herself, he knew that he had been the one that lost the battle, not her.

"Heero, please just...just leave me alone."

With that, Relena turned around and strode back into her room. She pulled the glass doors leading to the balcony closed, locking them for the remainder of the night. Through her blurry vision, she took one last look at him before she yanked the heavy drapes shut, shutting him out in the process. She held onto the drapes with a death grip for support as her knees gave out and the silent sobs began to course through her body.

Heero stood there, staring back at the maroon drapes that blocked Relena from him. No, he was wrong. The drapes hadn't done anything to separate them; it had been the walls he built all those years ago that he was too afraid to tear down.

'Coward.' The small voice inside his head finally spoke up.

Striding over to the edge of the balcony, Heero threw one leg over the side of the stone railing. He looked back over his shoulder toward the glass doors and caught a glimpse of the teddy bear sitting on the patio table; looking out of place and lost. Pushing off the railing, he landed with ease on the grass below and began making his way off the Peacecraft property, all the while thinking about how the teddy bear wasn't the only thing that felt lost and alone.
Breaker of Contracts
Lover of Secondary Pairings
and overall Mistress of Mayhem

"I'm a Bitch
I'm a Tease
I'm a Goddess on my knees
When you're hurt, when you suffer
I'm your Angel undercover"
-- Meredith Brooks

Primus2021
Fanfic Connoisseur|NewType
Posts: 98
Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 9:15 am
Location: Pasadena, Ca. USA

Post by Primus2021 »

How sad I heel the pian they both have & like them or rether like Heero I can't cry, well I'm off to part 3 to read more, this is a great story.

Sincerly: Primus2021
Sincerely: Primus2021

"1xR FOREVER!!!!!!!!!"

>:) 8) :D :lol: :salute:

Post Reply

Return to “Loyce”