Raw Emotion

[Athame]

Raw Emotion
By: Athame
Disclaimer: Don?t own. Don?t sue.

He loved to watch her play. Her eyes would grow distant, the barest of smiles adorning her face as long, slim fingers danced over the ivory keys. She was not given to flailing exaggeratedly as some professionals tended to do ? rather, she swayed, ever so slightly, while weaving the notes, layer upon layer, into melody. Individual chords flowed languidly from one to the other like water over stones, singing her innermost feelings as clouded aquamarines stared into something none of them could see. She never played sunny, happy songs people would expect to hear from such a young, innocent creature. Those were songs that were played just for the sake of being played, and didn?t suit her. Instead, she preferred pieces that conjured up images in the listener?s mind ? tunes filled with melancholy, fire, and longing. Songs of raw emotion. And there was really only one way he could think to describe her while she played ? perfect.

She had surprised him the first time he heard her play, the first time he had surrendered to the pull of mortal sorcery. It had been a reunion of sorts, held in the newly built Peacecraft mansion. He had attended, for once, as a guest instead of bodyguard. After all, five gundam pilots and a twenty-man guard detail were more or less efficient in replacing her diligent bodyguard for a night. It had been around three or four in the morning when he had decided to take a walk in the gardens in a desperate attempt to shake his insomnia. On the way to the veranda, however, the soft strains of a melody had caught his attention, beckoning from the slightly open door to the music room. Curious, he had crept through the door with all the practiced stealth of the Perfect Soldier only to become motionless at the sight that met his eyes.

She sat, with her back to him, at the stately black Yamaha. Moonlight poured like pale white wine through the glass doors, tracing every strand of her flaxen hair in silver. The acoustics in the room were perfect, and the song swirled around him, surrounding him in a silken sheet woven of air and wind. The mournful notes flowed from pale fingers gliding over alabaster keys, shaping though, emotion and sound into magic until it permeated the room completely. Seeing her there, bathed in moonlight and encompassed by the haunting chords of an unknown song, he had felt the blood quicken in his veins. The familiar stirring in his chest rose, and for the first time, to his astonishment, the accompanying fear did not come. For the first time his emotions had a free reign in his mind without the fear that his past sins would taint her, of vulnerability, and most of all, that she didn?t really love him.

When the song had ended, she had turned around before he could disappear as quickly as he had appeared, and discovered that he had discovered her secret, and smiled. And he had known ever since.

*************

Tonight, he watched emotions run across her face from his customary armchair placed opposite her. As always, her music washed over him, carrying him away to a place where nothing mattered but her presence - not his duties, not her obligations, not even the last twenty-two years of his travesty of a life. Every night, for the past five years, they had done this. She would play, and he would listen. It was a hiatus from life and reality that they shared together; a soothing, healing respite from a world that had taken too much, too soon from both of them.

She was frustrated tonight, very likely from work. The song she had chosen this particular night was a fiery piece in minor key ? possibly Beethoven, possibly Chopin. Its crescendos were not gradual, and neither were its diminuendos. The notes rose and fell like the sea during a storm, and were just as wild, just as fierce. It was tragic to listen to, tragic...and beautiful. He closed his eyes and shivered slightly as the haunting melody pricked his skin with millions of tiny needles, causing his arms to tingle in the aftermath. It was amazing how she managed to manipulate the instrument so that it sang out her feelings, her essence, her soul to him as he drank in her expression, his mind focused on one thought: "perfect".

All too soon, the song ended, and she looked up shyly form the ivory keys like she did every time. And he, as he always did, gave a barely perceptible nod that she answered with a smile. This time though, something was different as the last note hung, quivering, in the air before fading into silence, leaving them staring at each other. Finally, he spoke, voicing the question he asked her every night after she had played for him.

"Do you never play anything joyful?"
She studied him for a moment, her light azure eyes piercing through whatever walls he had left after years of learning, from her, from everyone, how to have fun, how to laugh, to live...how to be human. Then, dropping her gaze, she replied with the same inquiry that she gave him every night in response to his question: "Do you want me to play something joyful?" A small, sad smile graced his lips, and he answered accordingly.

"No."

"I still love you."

"I know."

She responded with a rueful smile of her own, ending their nightly dialogue, and began to stand, but he was suddenly beside her with a hand on her arm, stopping her. Confused, she stared up into fathomless cobalt depths, her heart rate picking up at his proximity and a hope she tried desperately to repress. Slowly, his other hand reached up to trace her jaw with visible hesitation, then tilted her face up to his.

"But...I think...I do love you."

End.

A/N: This, if anybody is wondering, is the result of a strange dream and a cup of over-sweetened instant coffee. How over-sweetened, you ask? Let?s just say that many, many spoonfuls of sugar and a lot of artificially flavored creamer was involved. That stuff can kill you. Slowly. >_<


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Athame on 2002-07-13 12:27 ]</font>

[melodrama]

the result of extra sweet coffee huh?! well then.... *hands copious amounts of sweetner and coffee*

lovely fic! I really enjoyed your lyrical tone and the visual was excellant. I hope to read more of your work!?

thank you!

[Goldberry]

Wow.

I'm shocked speechless.

Well, maybe not speechless, as I'm still going to review. *wink* This is one of the more beautiful vignettes I've ever read! Totally engrossing, and since I'm a musician, this meant all the more to me. Every word was flowing and graceful and the entire story was like a song, wrapping around me as I read. I truly enjoyed this and I must implore you to write more! *grins*

Very descriptive and utterly charming, this is one of my favorites.

*hugs*
Berry

[kmf]

Beautiful, just beautiful. I adored the beginning, the description of Heero watching Relena play and the way she caught him watching.

Bravo!

kmf