Description:  The first in a series of fics.  Heero's job is to protect Relena, but it's torture being in love with the girl who had become his best friend and brought peace to his war-weary soul...Because she's in love with someone else. 
One drunken night, the truth comes out...but how will Relena react?

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam, you already know that so please don't sue.

This is a story about three little words. Each but one syllable long, a sentence possible to utter on the barest of last breaths. Yet these words have the greatest consequence. To say them is to destroy everything you know and are comfortable with and trust your fate to the winds of change. Hearts are filled with joy by these words, while others are broken beyond repair. They can cause the greatest happiness to one person, but cast another into endless despair. Once these words are said, nothing can ever be the same. However they are often said without a thought, by friends, families and lovers. They are often said at the wrong time, to the wrong person, and there are times when they are better of kept silent. Some people keep them locked away in the depths of their soul. But repressed feelings are doomed to grow stronger, and the words become inevitable. Those who read this be prepared, because I was not. Make sure you are prepared for everything that comes with saying I Love You.

THREE LITTLE WORDS.

by Beer-monster.

"Okay Heero I promise this will be the last one," said the girl as she dragged her unwilling friend into the woman's clothes shop. The man grunted in reply, as he shook off her hand and followed her into the store. His Prussian eyes flashed keenly beneath his the dark, brown bangs of unruly hair. His gaunt face was tilted downwards to regard the young woman with an impassive frown.

She smiled playfully at his obvious dislike for shopping, and her azure eyes gleemed with mirth between locks of honey-gold hair which shone radiantly with the sun in her hair. Cheerfully bouncing on the balls of her feet as she waited for her companion to stalk his way over to her, she began glancing at the racks of gown and dresses surrounding her. She was obviously very excited about something. She was also aware of how much her chirpyness annoyed the man with her, and was revelling in that fact.

" You said that three stores ago Relena," Heero said sullenly.

" Well I have to get a dress for the New Years Eve party tonight,." she merrily replied.

" You have thousands of dresses hanging in your wardrobe."

" Yes but this is a party with all my best friends and family, Milliardo and Noin are coming, so is Quatre. I have to look my best."

That Heero did not understand. Too him she always looked perfect. Like an angel. Even now dressed in a loose blouse and a pair of faded blue jeans, she took his breath away. Suddenly she turned to him.

" I'm sorry Heero," she said pointedly. " I know you want to be in the pub with Duo and the others but you are my bodyguard and you have to stay with me. Even if it means coming shopping."

All that betrayed his surprise was the slight raising of his eyebrows. Relena noticed it however and smiled.

" How did you know?" he asked.

" I know you too well Heero." she replied then laughed. he thought as he gave her one of his very, rare smiles.

She was write of course she did no him too well. Over the last year that he had been her official bodyguard they can become the closest of friends. She had worked tirelessly to see though the cracks in his soldier's mask, to see the man inside. To get to know that man inside. She was a life-saver to him. Just being with her made him feel the same peace that the world now shared, because of her. Because of her strength.

She struggled endlessly to keep the nations in harmony, yet she still found the time to bring a poor soldier comfort. And that she did, just talking to her Heero felt the knots in his muscles untie themselves and the demons in his mind quiet. She had not found everything yet. He still kept somethings hidden from her. Especially his true feelings.

Relena knew he was hiding something from her. She was his best friend but Heero was still Heero. The perfect soldier, stolid and impassive most of the time. It took a huge amount of talking and joking to get him to smile, but it was worth it when he did. He gave her so much, he protected her with unwavering vigilance, and brought her comfort when the pressure of her duty to the world got to her. He gave her a blanket when she was cold, a shoulder to cry on and a pair of strong arms around her when she wanted to weep. He even made her laugh without trying. She would rant and bitch about some stubborn politician or another, and Heero would calmly ask if she wanted him to shoot them. She was never sure if he was joking or not.

But Relena could not give him half the comfort he needed. She still heard him at night, tossing and turning. Yelling and weeping at ghosts and phantoms of the past that still inhabited his dreams. She would creep into his room and hold him, eventually after the tears had dried and his monsters had fell silent he would still. But they would come back another night.

" This one is gorgeous," Relena cooed grabbing a dress in a flurry of black silk. She held it in front of her, face alight with childish delight. Heero's heart lurched as he saw her become even more beautiful, he had not thought it possible as to him she always radiated beauty.

" Can I see it," he asked.

" No," she said.

Heero's face remained impassive like always, but she could tell he was surprised by her answer.

" You have the personality of a boulder remember. Not too mention your fashion sense. I mean green vest and spandex shorts, what were you thinking," she said as she shook her head in mock pity.

Heero quirked his eyebrow at her sarcasm and replied with a simple " Hn!".

She smiled and reached up to pat his head lightly as a mother might do to a child.

" If you sit here and be a good bodyguard, a might just let you see it when I try it on," she said patronisingly.

" Hn," he grunted again.

She spun and turned towards the changing rooms. But before she had taken two steps the air was cut by a high pitching, rythmic whine. Relena started and began patting her person as if searching for something. Finally she reached into the left pocket of her jeans and pulled out the ringing device. She flipped up the silver sover of her mobile and greeted the caller with a beaming smile.

" Hey baby," she cried ecstatically.

Heero who was at Relena's side turned to the tiny video screen on the phones display, and looked at the face of Relena's boyfriend.

Jonathan Robert Park smiled at Relena across the space between them through the marvel of digital technology. Fair, flaxen hear was swept into rough parting across his brown. The sparkle in his green eyes was visible even on the small screen, his eyes shone with a warm, emerald light Heero noticed, whereas his own glistened like cold and forbiddng blue ice. The man also smiled a dazzling, loving grin revealing rows of perfect, pearly teeth. Heero knew he practically never smiled, and even when he could bring himself to it was a cruel, sidelong smirk. Jonathan was a faultless match for Relena, kind and generous, loving and funny. Heero hated the man. But he made her so happy he could not begrudge him anything. he thought.

The two lovers conversation was brief. Relena was dissapointed that Jonathan could not join her at her party. He worked as a security official on one of the more distant colonies, that combined with Relena's hectic schedule made their moments together brief and infrequent. But Relena longed for each one and when they were together they were wild and deleriously happy. Heero knew that for sure. He had often considered cutting off his own ears or rendering himself unconscious, so that he would not be forced to listen to them moaning and panting in the next room. He had endured torture sessions on mission, some which involved spikes and several thousand amps of direct current. None were as painful as hearing her squeal and whimper in pleasure, he wanted to die but had to settle for banging his head against the bathroom wall as he took a VERY cold shower.

" I'll see you as soon as I can I promise," he swore to her.

" Okay then," she said still obviously upset. " I love you," she said.

Those words tore Heero apart in less than a second. He felt as if someone had plunged a white hot blade into his heart and was now slowly twisting it. His world collapsed and he felt such pain that everything else seemed lifeless and black, everytime she uttered those words. Three little words he longed for her to say to him. Three little words he could never find it within himself to say to her.

Relena bought that black dress, though Heero never got to see it as the moment his friend stepped into the changing room, he was accosted by a bubbly, brunnette, sales assistant. Heero felt like clawing at the walls as the irritating girl planted herself in front of him and began flirting outrageously. The death glares he sent her way would have floored a rhinoceros from fifteen feet. The annoying harpy did not notice. Things were finally resolved happily when Relena emerged from the fitting room and promptly threw her arms around him. The girl blushed like a sunset and politely asked if Relena wished to purchase the dress. Needless to say Heero sprung for lunch.

When they returned to the Peacecraft manor, Relena's trusted butler Paygan was overseeing the decorating and rearrangment of the grand ballroom. Various workmen and servants were bustling about carrying the ornate, antique furniture from the hall and replacing it with simple fold-out chairs and stools. The intricate protraits of past Sanc monarchs were taken out too, as well as the long velvet curtains. Things were being brought in too. Four huge stereo speakers were being wheeled on trolleys into the room were they were hooked up to an ornate, and hi-tech stereo system.

Relena smiled mischievously to her self. Everything was going perfectly. This was not to be some stuffy, stiff-colared, up-turned nose, aristocratic, political function. This was HER party. She and everyone else was going to have fun. That, however required alcohol. Lots and lots of it.

She turned to Heero, who was currently leaning against the wall staring angrily at the stereo. The man knew that Relena and Duo were going to force him too enjoy himself, he also estimated that Relena would drag him up and try to get him to dance with her. That disturbed Heero slightly. Relena knew what he was thinking and also knew that he was right.

" Heero. Duo and Hilde will be over with the other in a couple of hours. And soon after that the guests will start to arrive. So I'm going to start getting ready, you should too." she said.

" Relena it does not take men two hours to get ready for a party." He said sullenly. Relena rolled her eyes at the minor sexism. She knew he didn't really mean it but it was annoying nonetheless. " I think I'll go read for a while," he continued.

He recalled how she had put her arms around him in the store. Remembered the warmth of her body and how it felt pressed against him even through their clothes. he mentally reprimanded himself. Dirty thoughts about Relena were not appropriate for her bodyguard.

" Okay!" she said, and started off towards her room. Almost as an after thought shee added. " You know Heero, those black jean and white turtle-neck would be perfect for tonight." she suggested.

He nodded slightly. That girl had all the subtlety of a twenty-foot tidal wave.

Leaving his perch he followed up the stairs before turning into his room. Inside he pulled up the chair at the desk and booted his laptop. He thought it wise to double-check the security around the mansion, so began typing away and clicking his mouse. Fingers flying across the keyboard.

 

LATER THAT NIGHT

The music pounded against the walls of the ballroom,as the disco lights flashed a meriad of colours across the room. People crowded the dancefloor. Women wound their hips, and threw their heads from side to side in time with the percusive beats.

Men tried to impress the aforementioned women with swaying, staggered, drunken attempts at dance. Off the floor people sat together laughing and talking, couples hid in the shadows kissng and fondling one another. basically it was your typical party and few people were without a drink.

Heero stood leaning against the wall, arms folded and bangs hanging across his eyes as he glared at the bottle of beer in Duo's hand.

" C'mon Heero, one is not gonna kill ya," the American pilot promised.

" Hn."

Duo's brows lowered over his violet eyes. He reached back and tugged sharply on his thick chestneut braid, as he often did when annoyed. He and Heero had gone drinking hundreds of times in pubs on the colonies and on earth. They had drunk, gargled, staggered, fallen over and pulled ( before he settled with Hilde) together more times than he could count. And now the man who could gargle whisky for a minute and a half, refused to drink. he would not alow it. He was a nineteen year old male, along with sex the persuit of alcohol was the most important thing in life.

" Heero you love to drink, now stop being a wuss and down it," he snapped waving the bottle of budweiser before his stoic companion's eyes.

" Duo have I ever told you you're a complete moron," Heero said coldly.

" Yes lots of times," Duo piped. " But why this time."

" Relena's here. I'm her bodyguard. I can't get drunk." explained Heero.

Duo looked at him incredulously for a couple of long seconds, the grinned broadly. His face lighting up with cheer. Heero scowled in response.

" Oh is that it?," Duo said. " Well I can take care of that."

Turning so fast that his braid whipped through the air, Duo cupped a hand to his mouth and shouted across the room.

" HEY HILDE! COME HERE FOR A MINUTE." he yelled.

Heero rolled his eyes in exasperation. Does the man have no dignity? Shouting across the room like the great cretin that he is. He considered it fortunate that the music was so loud. Even so Hilde heard. Heero could not help but feel curious about how summoning his girlfriend would help Duo " take care" of his problem. Then he saw who was with Hilde, and his mouth dried and his breath quickened.

Relena was stunning in her black dress. Long enough for modesty, but short enough so that Heero could see her long, shaply legs. The black silk shimerred with her every movement as the flashing lights lit her face beautifully. The dress revealed the creamy skin of her back between the thin straps which held the gown up on her curved shoulder. The material dipped low enough so that he could see the slopes of her breasts. Her golden hair hung lose, so that it fell in waves about her shoulders. She wore very little make-up, the tinyest hint of eye shadow and a touch of pink lipstick on her moist lips. It made her look natural, like Relena.

It took all of Heero's trained discipline to keep his rocky, impassive mask. he prayed silently.

Relena was also giving Heero appreciative looks. Although she had a boyfriend whom she loved, it did not take away her ability to see, or to appreciate handsome men. And Heero was looking very handsome. The shadows of the room played across his face in a way that brought out the strength in the lines of his guant face. His unruly bangs hung over his icy, blue eyes in that way that she had always found unbelievably sexy. He was wearing the clothes she had suggested, the form-hugging turtleneck accentuated his lithe muscles beautifully. The black jeans emphasised his long, agile legs. Even his scowl made him look good.

A wet, smacking sound shook Relena and Heero from the admiring revelry. Turning, they were not surprised to see Duo and Hilde passionately kissing. They almost never stopped even after a year together. Relena politely cleared her throat and finally they peeled themselves of each other. Duo grinned stupidly and wiped the lipstick smudges from his lips.

" Anyway," he said almost deliriously.

" Yeah so anyway," Hilde started before slapping Duo upside the head.

" Owch!"

" That's for shouting for me like I'm some kind of servant," she explained angrily.

" Sorry," he said sheepishly, something Duo only did because of Hilde.

" That's better, now what do you want?"

" Heero won't drink with me," Duo whined.

Hilde eyes widened. Now that was a surprise. She had seen Heero chug down some enormous amounts of beer and booze before. Not that he was a good drunk. The emotion-amplifying effects of alcohol had little effect on a man who had abandoned his emotions like Heero had. But still the fact that he wouldn't drink especially with his best friend was kind of odd.

" Why?" was all she asked.

" Because he's a miserable old man that why." Duo responded drily. " All he needs now is a pipe, slippers and a set of false teeth."

" Duo, shut up before you suffocate us all with the bullshit coming out of your mouth." Heero spat.

Duo ignored him and turned to Relena. " You see Rel. He won't drink because he's your bodyguard. He thinks he has to protect you."

" Oh really," she said dangerously. The man irritated her endlessly. He was using his job as an excuse to avoid having a good time and acting like a normal person.

Well there was no way she was going to let him get away with it. He was going to have to enjoy himself or die trying.

" Heero you now have the night off." she said imperiously and then waited for a reaction. As usual she got none.

" We have enough guards to ensure I don't get shot. So you are going to enjoy yourself. I order you to have fun I also order you..." she turned and snatched the bottle from Duo's hand. "... to down this beer."

Finally she got a response as Heero began to protest.

" Relena I..."

" Down it," she commanded, and Heero dutifully guzzled away the entire bottle.

" No I'm of to go and chat with Quatre and Dorothy, I don't want to see you without a drink for the rest of the night Got it." Relena continued impressed with her hard tone and amused at how much she was annoying Heero. With one last lingering look, she took in Heero's handsome form, perplexed face and beautiful eyes and left him standing there. Watching her go.

He swore silently.

" Duo?"

" Yeah buddy," the american cheerily replied.

" Get me another drink."

" Maxwell you honourless jerk, have you been sneaking sips of my beer." Wu Fei yelled in the braided boy's ear.

" Now Wuffie why would you think that," Duo replied with a false innocence.

" Because you do it all the time. And don't call me Wuffie or I'll castrate you."

" I don't think Hilde would be happy if you did that Wuffie."

Heero almost sighed as he took another long pull from his fourth beer. You could tell that Duo and Wu Fei had drunk too much. The American was trying deliberately to annoy the staunch Chinese pilot, and Wu Fei was letting him succeed. It was the same every time, whether they were at a ball or a club, Wu Fei would yell and Duo would twisty his words and Wu Fei would yell some more. Still Heero had to admit it was pretty entertaining.

" Maxwell, nobody wishes to hear the details of your sordid sex life you fould minded pervert."

" Well if you're so opposed to people sharing their intimate details Wu Fei, I would go and stop Sally from talking to anymore people." Trowa said as he approached the table with Quatre.

" Sally?" Wu Fei muttered weakly.

" Yes. It seems she got chatting to Dorothy, you know what women are like. Anyway Dorothy was talking about a recent visit to China that she and Quatre had embarked on, when Sally mentioned your own recent visit and the ' interesting' hotel you visted. The Golden Lotus I think it was called."

The colour had drained from Wu fei's face, his eyes were wide and his lip trembled slightly. A small sount came from his throat that Heero thought sounded like " Eeep,"

The one emerald eye that was not hidden by Trowa's huge crest of hair sparkled with amusement. An emotion further evident by the sardonic half-smile. Trowa thought.

" She was getting quite explicit when we left. Wasn't. she Quatre?"

The blond boy nodded emphatically, already engaged in a violent struggle to keep from laughing.

" Is it true that you let her tie your arms to the bed with a silk scarf."

The colour that had drained from Wu Fei's face now flooded back, this time with reinforcements. The Chinaman's skin lit up, blushing several interesting shades of red. His lips moved but no sound came from him, his eyes were so open so wide that it looked as though his eyeballs would fall out of the sockets. Heero's own suprise ( and vast amusement) was only displayed by a quirk of his eyebrow and a whimsical smirk as he stared at Wu Fei. However he was surprised there was no sound as Duo's jaw dropped to the table. The Americans brow's looked as if they were trying to crawl up to his head. For once Duo was rendered completely speechless. It did not last though

" WAH HA HA HA HA!" Duo burst into a chorus of uproarious guffaws.

Hearing the braided boy violent laughter made Wu Fei embarrssment dissolve into rage. Yanking sharply on Duo's braid he threw the American aside and charged off across the room screaming.

" WOMAN!"

Quatre, still laughing, helped Duo up and took a seat next to him as Trowa sat across from Heero. Duo reached beneath the table and retracted two bottle of beer from the crate that he had stashed there for them all.he politely offered them to the other pilots. Heero drained his own bottle as Duo watched him.

" Heero, you wanna another on buddy?" he asked.

Heero gave his friend a death glare.

" Don't ask stupid questions Duo." he said coldly.

" Er... I'll take that as a yes,"

" Duo why do you have box of Carling hidden beneath the table?" Quatre asked.

" Saves us walking across the room to get more booze," Duo replied as if was the most simple thing in the world.

" Oh silly of me to ask."

A moment of silence passes filled only by the sound of Heero and Duo popping the lid on the bottle and taking a swift swig before the suds spill over. Finally Duo had had enough, this was a party. He was not about to let his friends sit about silently.

" So Trowa, did Sally really say all those things about silk scarfs and Wuffie." Duo said with a slight slur that indicated that the alcohol as taking effect.

" No." Trowa replied simply.

" Then its not true?" Heero asked.

" Judging by his reaction I'd say it was true," Quatre surmised.

" Well how did you know?" Duo was obviously intensely curious.

" I didn't know I just suspected."

" Why,"

" Because he always seemed to be stroking his wrist as if they were chafed."

That was typical Trowa. He hardly said anything, but that allowed him to see thing most people missed because they were too busy babbling about nothing.

" Then how did you he would react like that, and how did you know he wouldn't deny it.?"

" People will believe anything, if they want it to be true Quatre had definitely had too much to drink. In fact Heero was starting to feel a little 'merry' himself.

" But that's beside the point. Trowa still shouldn't of tricked Wu Fei like that. He's our friend." said Quatre once again taking the moral high ground.

" Quatre you just don't know how to have a laugh. You're just like Mr Miserable- suicidal man here," Duo said gesturing to Heero.

" Yeah and your Mum," Heero responded presenting 'the bird' to Duo and taking another gulp of beer.

 

1 HOUR AND TWO BOTTLES LATER

" So the bat says ' Well I fucking didn't.'" Duo said before collapsing in laughter.

Heero just sat staring at the chortling pilot as if he had never seen him before. That was possibly the worst joke in the history of the world. Hell it was probably the worst sentence in the history of the world. Better things were said when General Custer shouted " Charge. " Just how could Duo find some so pathetic so amusing. It was time to get up and try to avoid talking to people for the rest of the night.

Grabbing his beer Heero stood up and walked off, without a word of explanation to Duo. As he walked around the room he saw some familar faces.

Several of Relena's friends from her school and office smiled and undressed him with their eyes as they saw him pass. He turned his face away indignantly. Across the room Zechs Marquise, or as he now acknowledged himself Milliardo Peacecraft, stared at him sternly. Zechs respected Heeros' ability as a soldier and so was pleased that he was Relena's bodyguard, but that did not mean he trusted Heero. Something about Heero threatening to kill his sister several times over. Heero hid his beer bottle behind his back. It just would not do for Zech to find out his sisters guardian was getting pissed. Heero reponded to Zech's stares with a nod and a glare, then almost sighed as the plaintinum haired man was distracted by Lucrezia Noin whispering in his ear. Then Heero noticed a flash of pink, and knew they were not whispereing. The wide, dopey grin on Zech's face was all the conformation he needed, as he hurriedly turned away.

he thought with disgust. This party was getting out of hand. But at least it was a laugh.

" Heero," came soft musical voice from behind him.

he thought before turning and issuing a curt: " Relena."

Relena looked him over, before taking a dainty sip from the bottle of Archer's in her hand. It was the only thing she could think of to pull herself from his eyes. She tried concentrating on another part of him, but there was not a single inch of him that did not make her breath quicken. She took another long swig of her drink before speaking.

" What are you doing wandering about Heero?" she asked.

" Avoiding Duo," he replied.

She laughed a little at that, she knew that even the Perfect Soldier's patience was sorely tried by Duo. Heero hated chirpy people. Happy-go-lucky types just rubbed Heero the wrong way. And Duo was the crown prince of cheerfullness.

" Well, I could ask Hilde to take Duo off your back and put him on his." Heero smirked. " If I didn't know better I'd say you were making perverse innuendos Relena," he said drily.

Relena playfully poked her tongue out at him, and was rewarded with a frivolous replica of Heero's death glare. As silence fell between them, Relena listened to the music which echoed in the hall. Currently there was playing, the kind of fast paced anthem that was popular in most nightclubs. Fast base and a haunting electrical melody blended together in a rhythm that set her pulse racing and her foot tapping.

The music made her feel like a caged animal, the sexy sounds filling her mind. She glanced over at the dance floor.

" Heero would you like to dance."

Heero stared at her silk clad body, drinking in the shapely curves of her legs and the expanse of her creamy white skin, revealed above the top of her dress as he gazed down into the shadows of her cleavage. Then he realised she had spoken.

" Huh?" he muttered forcing himself to look at her eyes, and soon regretting it as he felt himself being pulled into those azure pools.

" Dance, Heero do you want to."

" Thank you Relena, but I'd much rether not make a complete arse of myself."

" C'mon Heero it's not like you have a choice about this." she said taking his hand and pulling him towards the dance floor.

" Besides, "she wispered to him. "This way you can get yourself some action. I've seen loads of girl here checking you out. It would be easy for you to pull."

" Yay." he muttered sarcastically.

" Of course you would have to display a personality more warming than that of the grim reapers."

" Sounds like too much hard work," Heero said caustically.

Relena brought them to an open space near to the left of the dance floor's centre. The lights flashed their bright colours around them and the music pulsed in their ears. Relena began to move to the beat, shaking her hips and stepping seductively with the music. Heero by constrast was practically stood straight, barely moving except to shuffle on his feet half-heartedly. She knew he could dance as they danced at her birthday party years ago. Now he simply refused to dance because he was too proud to dance in front of his friends. That Relena had to fix, with some daring.

She gazed at Heero through her lashes seductively. Heero stared back blankly.

She moved closer, letting her hips swing as she approached. Heero looked down at her unfazed, when ran her fingers across the thin material of his turtleneck, feeling the ridges of the muscle beneath. Heero stiffened. < I love a challenge> she said silently and she smirked slyly. She then let her fingertips trail along his jaw line, allowing her nails to graze his chin. His eyes widened.

" Relena wha...." he began.

" Shhh!" she muttered placing her finger over his lips.

She leaned over, taking his hand and moving his arm so that it was wrapped around her waist. She slid her own hand up his thigh, over his buttock before it came to rest on his hip. Her body was pressed against his, and she could feel his lungs pumping like bellows against her.

" Now Heero, we dance." she whispered in his ear.

The expression on his face was amazing, the soldiers mask had crumbled.

Heero's prussian blue eyes were open wide, his mouth hanging open. Finally regaining his composure and replacing the mask, he glared at Relena. The honey-haired girl simply ignored him as she began winding her hips sensually. Using her grip on his waist she forced him to move his own hips.

He did not know whether or not it was th alcohol pulsing through his veins or the return of his long repressed sex drive, but he began to dance with Relena.

They writhed together sinously, Heero's hands sliding down to clutch Relena's waist. She slid her legs between his and pressed herself to him, holding him as they wound together.

Heero noticed his mouth had gone dry, and he was forced to lick cracked lips.

For once he cursed his heightened soldier's senses, the feeling of Relena's arms and body overwhelmed him. His head spun as her sweet perfume wafted into his nostrils and made his heart race. The music pulsed in his ears filling him with adrenaline. His self-contol faltered as he could not help but run his fingers over the curves of her body.

" Wow it seems like there is a man with dick under that soldier shell of his." Duo said.

" That's an eloquent way of putting it Duo," Quate commented drily.

Trowa said nothing. He lounged in his chair arms folded and legs outstretched, watching the two dancers intently. He often said nothing. Most people when they met him thought him insociable and stolid. He simply did not see the point in talking unless he had something important to say. People did not seem to see how much they failed to notice because of incessant jabbering. While other people talked he saw things that others missed, all of the little details. But anyone could see the attraction between Heero and Relena. No-one could miss the way they were drawn inexorably to one another. It was one of the most basic, scientific laws of the universe. The Princess of Peace and a blood-stained Perfect Soldier. Such total opposites, but they both possessed a strong will. And when powerful opposing charges meet they will be attracted in a reaction which dwarfs all else. It was a fundemental fact of nature and anyone could see it between those two. But to Trowa's patient perception, the attraction was explosive. When Heero looked at her or when Relena lightly touched his arm, bright sparks flew violently as if the very air about them was charged with potent electricity. Relena might love her new man passionately, and Trowa did not doubt those feelings were genuine. But she would always be bonded to Heero, as if their heartstrings were intertwined.

" I can't help but feel sorry for them," Quatre said. " It often seems such a tragedy they did not get together.How happy they could have been."

" And now there's Jonathan," Duo said sadly.

" He's a nice guy Duo. She loves him."

" Yeah I know."

" Still you gotta say they're tearing it up, and are getting quite hot." Duo continued to stare at the couple, idly tugging at his collar as if to vent off steam. His voice trailed of in distraction as he continued to gaze on the dance floor. " Very hot." Suddenly he jumped up, and began blushing profusely. " Hey I gotta go find Hilde, see ya later." Trowa watched him bounce away in search of his girlfirend and hopefully an empty bedroom.

Relena was starting to regret teasing Heero. She had not anticipated the effect being this close to him was having on her. His gaze captivated her as he stared down at her, his death glare seeming bewitchingly sexy. The masculine aroma of his cologne clouded her senses. She could feel the strength and desire in his hands as they ran over her, she shivered at the sensation of his muscles bunching beneath her fingertips.

She pulled her eyes away from Heero's before they swallowed her in their depths.

The rapid rythym of the wild music finally slowed before stopping. In its place rose a haunting melody rendered on piano and violin. The song was tragic in its slow and pure romance. Heero and Relena sprang away from each other, her face was flushed. Around them couples took to the floor, holding each other close as a soft voice filled the air with song.

Did you ever love somebody,

So much that the earth moved...

Heero turned away poising to walk from the dancefloor. Relena caught his hand and pulled him back to her.

" I haven't finished dancing with you yet, Heero." she said loftily.

" But Relena, this is different" he said stubbornly.

" Why?" she asked. " Because this is a love song and not just innocent false flirting. Why does that mean we can't dance."

" It just does..." he said petulant at not having a good answer, for once.

Did you ever love somebody,

Even though it hurt to...

" Heero," her voice softened so that his name souded like a caress. " You're my friend, my best friend. That's what I want. Lets set aside the silly games we play with each other, dance with me as my friend." she implored and Heero could not refuse.

He stepped towards to her, allowing her arms to link gently around his neck, her hands pressed against his shoulder blades and pulling him closer. Heero wrapped his right arm gently around her waist, his left resting tentatively on her shoulder. They leaned upon each other, their faces touching cheek to cheek. Gently holding to each other they began to sway to the gentle melody.

Did you ever love somebody,

Nothing else your heart could do...

Did you ever love somebody,

Who never knew.

Trowa watched from his seat, his heart almost melting at the sight before him. If he had seen sparks before, now there was a blossoming light between them. It glowed with the warmth of the sun and enveloped the like a radiant halo. Before it had been clouded by competition, sexuality and flirtation. Now such obstructions dissolved and the bond between Heero and Relena was revealed in its purest form. However the pain that was not revealed by Heero's cold fascade, was shimmering in the icy shine of his eyes.

Have you ever laid your head down,

On the shoulder of a good friend.

And then had to look away somehow,

Had to hide the way you felt for them.

Heero's heart ached. He listened in disbelief to the ethereal lyrics wound through the air around him. It seemed as if someone had peeked into the inner workings of his soul. As if the stoic walls and scarcastic barricades he had build up around his emotions had been broken into, and the contents given to a woman to sing about. The song so clearly revealed the feeling he had never shared, not even with Relena. And that was his most ardent regret in a life ridden with them.

Have you ever prayed the day would come,

You'd hear them say they feel it too.

Have you ever loved somebody,

Who never knew.

Relena could feel the soft warmth of his breath on her neck as they danced. She moved closer to him, taking comfort in his presence. His form did not yield as she leant into him, he remained a pillar of strength. One that she could always count on to support her in times of need, or whenever she wanted a friend. Without him she would not have had the will to bring peace to the ESUN. Without him she would not have met Jonathan, or had the courage to make their relationship work. A relationship that brought so much joy into her life. He was her guardian and her friend and she would never wish him gone.

And if you did,

Well you know I'd understand.

I could, I would

More than anybody can.

The sense of peace that held them shattered with the shrill ring of a mobile phone.

Did you ever love somebody,

Relena's face lit up with elation as she recognised the beautiful image of the man displayed on the small view screen.

So much that the Earth moved.

The sparkles vanished from Heero's eyes, swiftly replaced by the dull shadow of pain as Relena excused herself to talk on the phone.

Did you ever love somebody,

Even though it hurt to.

Heero clenched his fists so tightly that his knuckles turned white, the pain inside dulling the sharp sensation of his nails digging into the flesh of his palm. His jaw tightened as he watched Relena walk happily from the dance floor.

Did you ever love somebody,

Nothing else your heart could do.

He stood alone on the dancefloor. The gentle swirling of the romantic disco lights cast shifting shadows on his face. All around him couples tenderly danced with each other, taking comfort in each other. Heero was on his own, standing stiffly as if shell-shocked.

Did you ever love somebody.

Setting his face grimly, he strode purposely across the room. People lept out of his path, intimidated by his fierce expression and flaring death glare. He headed directly for the table at the side of the room where crates of beer, alco-pops and bottles of spirits were arrayed for peoples enjoyment, along with stacks of paper cups. He was going to get very drunk.

Like I love you.

Heero immediately grasped a large bottle of Glenfiddich Scotch whisky. Spinning the cap off, he poured himself a large cup full, which to anyones reckoning was a least a pentuple measure. He swifty lifted to cup to his lips and knocked back the contents. He found a little succour in the fire which arouse in his belly. Then he bought bottle to cup again and repoured.

Like I love you.

 

AN INDETERMINABLE PERIOD OF TIME LATER, THE EVENTS OF WHICH ARE CLOUDED IN AN ALCOHOL INDUCED HAZE.

Heero kneeled over the toilet, supporting his self with his hands upon the seat, as he vomited violently. His sides ached and his troat was raw as ejected tides of acidic bile from his gullet. After several bouts of retching, he rolled over and slumped against the bathroom wall. he thought thinking back to that last beverage, an unholy mixture of whisky, gin, vodka and an apple hooch. Not pleasing to the mouth or stomach.

" Now what," he asked out loud.

He had to do something besides sit in the bathroom. Drinking immediately after being sick was never a good idea and therefore he needed another occupation. He really did not want to talk to the other pilots, the pain from the events of the dancefloor was still too near. He thought with a weak smile. Then noticing the

blurs swimming in his vision he mentally added < I think>.

Finally, he awkwardly scrabbled to his wobbly feet and staggered from the bathroom. Making his way to the ball room he blinked in surprise and sat/fell over into a seat. The room was empty but for a few servants who were scattered across the great hall.

The sound of heeled shoes clicking against the floor was like a drum resounding inside Heero's skull. He looked up through blurry eyes in the direction of the sound. Relena was walking with a bounce that was almost skipping. She had a beutiful smile on her lips which lit up her entire form like a halo. Heero's heart lurched to at the sight of her, and he damned the alcohol for not dulling the pain like he wanted it to.

" Hello Heero, have we drunk a little too much?" she asked a little too sweetly.

" Hn" he replied.

" C'mon. It's nearly two o'clock in the morning. And I have a mountain of paperwork in the office for tomorrow."

Heero nodded his agreement and attempted to stand, however the beer and whisky returned and made the roomk spin around him. He stumbled heavily into Relena, nearly sending them both sprawling.

" You really did drink to much." she said as they both wavered back and forth trying to remain standing. Heero did not reply, instead his blinked rapidly and shook his head trying to clear his brain. Relena took hold of his arm and put it across her shoulder, giving him the extra support he needed. Together they began making their way towards their rooms.

Heero felt Relena body against his, smelled her intoxicating perfume. He felt the strirring of long repressed emotions, his trained will was weakened by alcohol and the tides of emotions continued to crash against his defensive walls. She was being kind to him, as she always had been. She was the first person ever to show concern for him, after the girl and her dog. He could not remember his parents, so there was no recollection of Motherly love. All he could remember was Doctor J and his training, the blood,sweat and tears . Now she was showing once again that she cared.

At the top of the stares he pushed her roughly away, the soldier inside him unwilling to accept her help. He heard her slam against the wall, and immediately guilt welled up inside of him. Now he was acting like a drunked jerk. He was furious at himself but first he turned to Relena.

She was staring back at him, her expression full of confusion and a little hurt.

She rubbed absently at a small bump on her head as she spoke his name so softly he barely heard it. He looked at her softly, taking all of the hardness from his gaze, as he did only for her.

" I'm so sorry Relena," he whispred and felt his internal walls weaken against the emotional waves.

His hand strayed up the her head, and genty massaged the bruise he had carelessly caused.

" Heero," she said.

He did not hear her, as his fingers ran through her golden tresses. He slowly, brushed the hair from her eyes, not seeming to notice he was doing it. Fingers that were calloused from years of weapons training traced along her skin with a touch so gentle, that she could not feel his fingers but rather the tingkling sensaition that remained after his hand passed. He carressed her cheek, then he softly followed her jawline to her chin, sliding his fingers lightly along her lips. Cupping her chin with his fore-finger he tilted her head up so that he could look into her eyes. He studied each swirls of sky blue that shone in her irises like the facets of a sapphire, and he felt the walls break and the tides run free. His emotions consumed his very being, and the three little words that he had held back for so long were ushered from his lips.

" I love you Relena," he whispered.

Her eyes widened and the breath in her throat caught. Slowly he leaned in and brushed his lips against hers. His arms wrapped themselves around her as gently kissed her, entreating her to respond. After what seemed an eternity ashe did. Their lips met and touched so softly the very nerve endings of their lips seemed to melt. Heero felt complete for the first time in his life. Such joyous moments do not last however, although they may create a universe in which two people can exist and share such bliss, they can only span a heartbeat in real time.

Heero's eyes snapped open and he broke himself away. His heart was pounding and he Relena looked at him thinking she saw a caged animal trapped inside a man. he yelled at himself mentally before turning for the bewildered girl and running into his room.

Relena watched him go, pangs of heart ache and confusion battering her. She heard his door slam and she slowly made her way to her own room, next to his the sound of Heero's voice uttering " I love you," flogging her all the way. Robotically, she stripped and climbed into bed, her last thought before falling asleep were .

Only silence answered her.

 

 

THE END??

This story is dedicated to Stephanie Strafford.

Author's Notes- I would like to explain my reasons for writing this story. The fic is

based upon a recent experience of my own and I wrote this to exorcise the pain of that

event. As Bram Stoker wrote Dracula after a series of recurring dreams about

Vampire, I write this in hope that it will bring me confort from the events. Now you

also know why the introductory paragaraph was so melodramatic, the feeling were

fresh then.

Also about the depiction of the characters. Firstly I would like to say I do try to

keep the cast IC, but I wanted to make allowances for how the characters would

mature over the years since the series end. Therefore I wrote Heero as impassive but

not uncaring as I feel the years would teach him the good in life, I also made Relena a

bit more independent and frivolous, as a couple of years around Duo would do.

I also hope nobody objects to the emphasis on alcohol and parties and a little

sex. But try to remember pilots or not these characters are TEENAGERS and

therefore have all the hormonal impulses to have sex and drink as any other group of

youths. However I do admit I may be a little biased as I am English and getiing pissed

off our faces is an important part of our culture.

Finally I would like to stress that Relena does genuinely love her boyfriend

Jonathan and is not currently secretly in love with Heero while the Jonathan is just

there for plot. I did however want to emphasise a strong attraction both physical and

emotional between Heero and Relena, if this is will develop into stronger feelings is a

topic I would concentrate on if I get enough goof review to warrant continuing.

Thanks for reading

Beer-monster.

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