The little lies Heero and Relena have been telling themselves over the years are starting to unravel, now that they've broached the distance between them. Tired of being emotionally stuck, Relena tells Heero they have to move forward, for their own sakes.

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Again, I don't begin to own the characters. They're just muses for my own lack of talent :)

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When morning came, it hadn’t even occurred to Heero to stay. His focus had been to return to the colonies in time for his next shift. 

 

But as he caught some sleep on the long ride back, he dreamed of Relena and awoke disoriented to find himself back in the colonies. The next few days was much of the same - it felt foreign for him to return to his small, sparsely furnished bedroom and go to bed without her. He found himself reaching for her as he woke up and expecting her… where? 

 

She had never stepped foot in the quiet apartment building, or knew that he was working on the new housing projects she had championed. But the figure in the news no longer seemed like the real Relena; just a stranger completely unrelated to the woman he had been with that night.

 

He committed to memory every second he could relive. Her most sensitive spots, her quiet, lusty moans, the look in her eyes… Heero pored over every moment, looking for more clues to the woman that was Relena, not the polished politician the world saw. 

 

And that’s how he realized they had not used protection. 

 

The realization came suddenly, and he cursed himself. What if she was pregnant? How long before she knew? How would she feel, what would her plan be, how would it affect her career?

 

How could he help?

 

The questions plagued him for the next few weeks. He counted the days and marked the earliest they could know for sure. He made plans to travel, for longer this time, and went over in his head over and over again what they would have to talk about. It didn’t matter to him what needed to happen, only that he could be there.

 

And that was how, six weeks later, he found himself outside her bedroom again.

 

He had waited until he saw movement, and navigated around the improved security to stand on her balcony, hoping she hadn’t fallen asleep. The door had been fixed, but the bed was no longer in view from the door. Instead, there was a little sitting area he had seen outside her bathroom, and Relena was looking over papers she had laid across the little table. His shadow made her look up.

 

She stood without hesitation and made her way over to the doors. Her nightgown was long, nearly touching the floor, and hugged her shoulders loosely. 

 

Still, she was breathtaking as she moved towards him, seemingly gliding the few feet across her bedroom.

 

“Heero?” She opened the glass doors, and the sound of her voice caught his breath. “What’s wrong? Come inside.”

 

He did as she asked and watched her close the door, taking in every detail his mind had muddled since their last encounter.

 

“I was worried about you.” he heard himself say, the same way he had practiced over and over in his head. It sounded foreign, to hear it finally said.

 

-----

 

Relena was perplexed. She ran through the last few weeks in her mind, looking for anything that may have been broadcasted that could have made him worry. If she was honest, the biggest threat to her security for months had been… well, it had been him.

 

“You haven’t been sick?”

 

Did she look sick? Her brow furrowed even deeper, trying to find clues of anyone having been worried about her health.

 

Heero coughed, and she realized how awkward he looked. An idle thought wondered if he had just looked for an excuse to see her. Surely not…

 

“I thought th- by now if you...” His eyes moved to her stomach, finally revealing to her what he had thought was so serious he needed to come himself.

 

“Oh.” That would be concerning. “Um, Heero. Why don’t we sit down?”

 

It hadn’t even occurred to her that he would have been worried about getting her pregnant. Not that they had had time to talk about it, or she had any way of contacting him. 

 

Though, she supposed, that was why he was here.

 

When they settled into the little couch she turned to him. He seemed stiff, like a man receiving his sentence, but determined to hear whatever came next. This side of him made Relena smile.

 

“You know, my work is… fast paced.” she began, searching for the right way to broach the subject. ”And most people I work with are men, who don’t… have to slow down a few days every month.” Relena, paused, not having had explained this to many people before. 

 

Or really, anyone.

 

“I’m still very young, and people will find any reason they can to… not listen to someone the age of their grandchildren. I was struggling, and when I was talking to Dorothy she suggested birth control.

 

“It made sense. I could focus more on my work, and I could stop if I ever wanted to... have a family.” It also insured her against surprise visits from a certain person, apparently. “It didn’t solve everything, but it was an easy way to… make things better.”

 

She didn’t know when Heero had understood what she was trying to tell him. There was a point where she was really trying to defend her decision to herself. Relena was almost startled when he spoke next.

 

“So there was never… even a possibility.”

 

Was he relieved? It was hard for her to tell. It drove home how little she really knew the man sitting next to her now. But, even still, he had come all this way to make sure she was alright. It was a kindness Relena did not often see in her life.

 

“No, Heero. But thank you, really, for thinking of me.” She covered his hand with hers. It was the one that had been injured that night. The skin was mostly healed, with only a few scratches still visible. The tenderness of the moment reminded her of their childhoods, and the human connection they had found in each other.

 

But that wasn’t who they were any more.

 

She stood and put on her hostess face. “Will you be staying? I can have a bedroom made up for you.”

 

The silence that followed was deafening.

 

Heero’s eyes were searching her, asking her if this was really what she wanted. If this was the distance that was going to define their relationship moving forward. The courage that she hadn’t realized she was mustering failed her, her chest heavy with dread.

 

“I’m sorry, you can’t stay with me. Heero, I won’t ask you to leave but you can’t- we can’t...”

 

She couldn’t. The idea of waiting for him, not knowing when he would next appear, appeasing herself with memories of the people they used to be. It wasn’t fair to her, to either of them. She fought down the urge to cry, grasping for the words to explain.

 

“I don’t want to be stuck here. I’m not strong enough to be content with… Heero, I’ll want more.”

 

It was done. He would leave, and she would never see him again. It hurt but it would be better in the long run. She turned away from him, from the door, so he would be gone before she even knew it. The way he always left.

 

“I want more.”

 

 

-----

 

Heero hadn’t known he had wanted this until she’d asked for it. 

 

But suddenly the agony of the past few weeks made sense. The past few years, even. The reason why he never could give up the small connection they shared on her birthday.  He had been so… possessive of her private side, obsessively looking into every claim of a personal interview. Poring over her words, assuring himself that there was nothing they knew of her that he didn’t.

 

And then, his last visit. 

 

The way she completely took over his senses, permeated the corners of his mind. How had he actually managed to leave her room after that? And the way he had clung onto the idea that she was pregnant. He hadn’t even entertained the idea that she wasn’t. 

 

In fact, the news had nearly devastated him. 

 

The moments after Relena offered a separate bedroom had been nothing but panic. Panic that he had missed his chance, that she was shutting the door between them forever. That she had already come to the decision and was unmovable.

 

Instead, she wanted the same thing as him. And she was just as afraid that he didn’t feel the same way. 

 

And he had made her say it first.

 

Heero pulled her into his arms. She seemed like a frightened animal, afraid that any movement would mean her end. Former Queen of the World, current Vice Foreign Minister of the ESUN. Twenty-five year old woman. For all he had claimed to know her, he had missed her vulnerability, her humanity. 

 

He needed time to make it up to her.

 

Softly, he kissed along her brow, her nose, her cheeks, until her eyes lifted to meet his. He pushed her hair away from her face, trailing his fingers along her jawline before finally lifting her chin. Dropping his head, he brushed her lips with his, pausing to search her face for any reason to stop, before pulling her into a soft kiss. It wasn’t long, and he pulled back to watch her reaction.

 

He watched her eyes soften and tentatively raised her arms to his hips. She kissed him again and again, as if testing to see if he was real. He answered each with warm reassurance, determined to continue as long as she needed him to. Finally, she pressed her lips against his in a long, blissful kiss, melting into him as she pulled him closer. He felt himself reacting to her body, and he pulled away, unsure if she was ready for his physical desire.

 

Relena was breathing heavily, though he supposed they both were. She seemed completely unaware of his arousal, and moved to wrap her arms around his neck. He caught her.

 

“I’m not sure I can hold back.” His voice was low and scratchy. Heero had to swallow as he looked down at her.

 

She seemed to consider it for a moment, a brief one, before she lowered her arms and instead started to pull at his jacket. 

 

“Don’t.”

 

Without his jacket Relena was free to paw at his back and tangle her fingers in his hair. Her kisses became more desperate and he responded in turn. Heero tried to attack her mouth at a different angle, but even nearly lifting her up was still not getting the results he wanted.

 

So he brought her to the bed. 

 

Instead of laying down obediently she climbed up and sat on her knees, slowly backing up until she had pulled him onto it as well. Her fingers slid under his shirt and they paused so he could take it off. Soon her nightgown followed, and his pants.

 

Only when she was fully nude did Relena relent to him, laying back against the pillows. Their hands explored each other, without the hindrance of clothes, testing the memories they had played over and over again in their minds. Determined to add to them.

 

Heero kissed down her breasts, trailing across her stomach until he could lift her legs and taste her hot, wet core. Her quick, halting gasps excited him nearly as much as watching her throwing her head against the pillows, and feeling her waist grind against him, begging for more. He probed her with his tongue, then his fingers, looking for the sweet spots he had found before. Relena protested right until her body shuddered, clamping down on his fingers as her orgasm took over.

 

His fingers naturally slid out of her as he pulled himself up along beside her, claiming her mouth again. He laid next to Relena, teasing her with kisses as he ran his hands along her, reveling in the violent shudders they sometimes elicited. She panted every time he released her lips, reaching up to cup his face in a hand.

 

The satisfaction on her face conflicted him; should he let her rest or take her to new levels?

 

She didn’t give him the time to decide as her hand dropped from his face and enclosed around his hard member. Thought became impossible as she moved her hand along his length, softly massaging his head as she worked. 

 

It wasn’t hard, therefore, to push him fully on his back and settle herself between his legs, determined to return the favor. His mind went blank as her lips enclosed him, tracing his manhood with her tongue. She worked slowly, as if dragging his pleasure out carefully from within.

 

Heero had to stop her before she took him over the edge.

 

But Relena moved first, pulling herself to him for another kiss. The feeling of her soft, smooth body sliding across him was erotic, and he pressed a hand against the small of her back to stay her as he thrust his hips upward. 

 

She pulled herself through his grip, bringing her legs to either side of his body to stabilize herself. When the kiss ended she sat up, and Heero took in the sight of her, fully nude, reaching between them to adjust his aching arousal so it was lined up to her hot core. Heero moaned as he ground his hips, feeling her surrounding him.

 

He pulled her towards him, holding her just high enough on his body to press the tip of his cock against her, kissing everything he could reach. She was grinding her hips against him, looking for the perfect angle to take him inside… shuddering when they felt him part her. 

 

Hands on her hips, Heero gingerly lifted his hips, careful not to lose the angle she had worked so hard to find. Relena stayed perfectly still, sighing softly as he worked himself inside her. Only when he was firmly, deeply inside, did she start to rock against him.

 

Heero matched her slow, gentle pace, letting her lead their pleasure. Her hair spilled around them, and her sighs and moans seemed to echo against the thin curtain they made. She played with the angle, the intensity and the rhythm of their lovemaking, clenching her legs when she found a good combination. 

 

Heero was close to climax, but determined to let her orgasm again before indulging in his own. He punctuated her rhythmic motions with little thrusts, burying himself deeper than she could manage.

 

Teeth clenched, arms wrapped around her- anything he could do to take his mind away from the increasingly precarious pressure building in his loins- Relena’s release freed him to take his own. She had barely tensed when he felt himself unravel inside her, burying himself as far as their bodies would allow. Heero held her tightly as her body violently shuddered in pleasure, pulling at his sensitive manhood as it twitched. They rode the waves together, breathing heavily as they finally found themselves on the other side, entangled in one another.

 

With his last bit of strength Heero gathered Relena up in his arms and rolled her back into the pillows, so she could lie comfortably in his arms. They fell asleep like that, blissfully ignorant of the world.

 

 

-----

 

Relena awoke to the soft rapping against her bedroom door. Pagan’s worried voice gently called from the other side.

 

“Miss Relena, are you ok? It’s nearly seven in the morning.” Relena jumped up in the bed, alarmed by the time. “If you’d like, I can ask your assistant to clear your morning.”

 

Her sheets puddled around her bare waist, and her eyes shot next to her. Heero was gone. 

 

Of course.

 

“No… no… my apologies to the staff, Pagan. Please have breakfast ready in ten minutes.” She ran her hand down her face, burying the disappointment deep, deep inside. 

 

She had a full day today.

 

“Very well Miss.” As his footsteps retreated Relena started going over what she could manage to do in the next ten minutes.

 

“I didn’t know what time you had to be up.”

 

Her heart jumped as Heero stepped out of her bathroom, half dressed in his briefs and shirt. He strode over to her. “Sorry.”

 

Of course he wouldn’t let himself be caught. Oh god, how long had he been up? Did he even sleep? Did she snore?

 

“No, it’s fine!” Her voice came out in a high pitch. She cleared her throat to calm her heart. “It’s fine. I’ll have to rush a little. Sorry we can’t-”

 

He leaned over and kissed her. She jumped back, protesting that her breath was awful. Heero laughed and kissed her again, pulling her out of the bed and onto her feet.

 

“You should get ready.”

 

He walked away in search of the rest of his clothes. Relena started towards her bathroom, but stopped before she disappeared behind the door.

 

“You’ll have breakfast, right?”

 

It was Heero’s turn to be caught by surprise. No doubt he had planned to sneak out the same way as he came in.

 

“You’ll have breakfast.” and she pulled the bell to have Pagan return.

 

They left her bedroom together, much to the surprise of her staff. She could feel the curiosity surrounding the Heero Yuy. She requested privacy in the dining room, so he could be comfortable.

 

“I have to go, but I’ll have someone get you a copy of my schedule.” she said, buttering her toast. “Pagan will make sure everyone knows who you are… so you can come and go through the front door. I’m sorry we didn’t get a chance to talk.”

 

Heero had been quiet since leaving her bedroom. She waited for him to give any indication of what to expect.

 

“I had thought I would need a week.”

 

Relena suppressed the urge to ask him when he would be back that night. She didn’t want to set any expectations. It was enough that he was sitting across from her, taking breakfast with her.

 

“Well I hope you’ll feel welcome to stay here if you need.” She smiled. They ate the rest of their breakfast in silence, stealing glances at the other.

 

When Relena found Heero in her bedroom that evening, reviewing her security notes, the anxiety of the day hung uselessly inside her chest. He looked up when she came in, smiling. 

 

It took her breath away.

 

“I didn’t feel comfortable borrowing your office.” A little feeling of glee percolated through her, knowing he felt comfortable in her bedroom. She walked over to him, and he stood to kiss her.

 

“Have you been looking at this all day?” she figured he was the best person to make improvements to her team.

 

“No, I spoke to Trowa today.” She arched her brows. She had had little contact with the third Gundam pilot since the war. “He’s a good source of work.”

 

Heero explained that he had been working on different projects as a manual labourer and mobile suit operator in the years they had been apart, but there was little of that work on Earth. “I have options.”

 

“I’m not asking you to drop everything immediately. Just… being in contact would be a good start.”

 

“The plan - I planned- to wrap up work and move to Earth.” She was surprised to hear this. “I figured I had eight months…”

 

Right, that. She blushed at the idea of Heero rushing to her side to be a father. His dedication to her, as always, went beyond reason.

 

“I suppose I should be sorry I ruined your plans?” She teased, trying to push past the subject.

 

He smiled and kissed her again.

 

They fell asleep that night in each other’s arms, as though it was the most natural thing in the world.