Blissful Ignorance

Disclaimer: Don't own it... Didn't mention before, but i do own the original characters, except Joseph K. [He's from Kafka's book, The Trial. Am i the only person who's read it?]

Rating: PG i guess
WArnings: Heero bashing


PART EIGHT


"Heero! Where have you been?" Her sweet, wonderful, faithful, emotional, truly amazing voice filtered through the giddy fog in his mind. "Are you alright? Heero?"

"I'm fine now," he grunted before bending down to take her lips in his own. Relena shivered with his touch. Why had he ever thought he didn't satisfy his wife's desires?

He grunted in irritation as her small hands pushed him away. "Hm?Heero, I have to tell you?what I meant to before?we were interrupted."

"I know," he stated curtly.

"You know?"

"Hn." He leaned forward for a kiss just to hear Relena's voice again.

"How did you find out? Did Joseph tell you?"

Heero winced, his mind replaying the bedroom scene again. "More or less."

She sighed dramatically. "I knew he would never be able to keep it a secret! He was so excited about being able to see the ultra sound and kept on talking about feeling the baby kick. And Hilde still wants me to go through with the blackmail. Oh, well?"

"Blackmail?" he asked with some interest.

"It involves her coming back from Earth with Cat and Ryan and leaving them here while we go get massages and other such things."

Heero frowned. The idea of Relena lying alone and naked, while another man rubbed her back was not a welcome one. That could he taken care of later, though. Her lips were soft right now. Then a question forced his lips away; this one asked by Heero himself. "Why did you request to Une that K. come with us?"

"Joseph is a good friend of mine, and well, his?lover?lives (or is based) on L3, explaining his desire to come. Also, that little false rumor floating around about 'us' was started by yours truly??"

Heero blinked. "What?"

"If you'd let me finish, mister," she muttered. "The state of his?sexual preferences?is still not met with much enthusiasm, and this rumor keeps Joseph from being ridiculed. That sort of thing?"

"Hn," Heero grunted. It made enough sense? Her lips, however, were now the main objective. But, just as he could feel them under his own, a short, pained, and very tired 'murow' sounded.

He groaned and collapsed on his wife. Turning a death glare on the Wet Carpet, he grunted. "Omae o koroso."

Relena ran a hand through his hair, turning as well, to the creature. "Don't worry; he never follows through with that threat. I am a living example."

Heero scowled. Relena giggled. The Wet Carpet, still looking drugged and irritated, let out another weak, "Murow."

A small finger touched Heero's nose. "If you feed him, then I may let you have dessert after?hm? How does that sound?"

Very good. Very good. Swiftly, the man rose and rolled off the bed. "Come on, Wet Carpet." A giggle met this and Heero turned to scowl at his wife. "I think you enjoy my discomfort."

"Why not? Because your discomfort now means my pleasure later." Her tone was that of aristocracy as she rolled over and placed the back of her hand on her forehead before opening her eyes to check her husband's reaction. Heero blinked; Heero sighed. How was it that she played him so well?

"Hn."

"Oh, Heero?"

He paused, then turned to gaze at his wife. She asked, "You are fine with the baby?"

"Yes, but on one condition??"

"I refuse to name the child Boris Jude, Heero," she stated flatly.

He sighed. "Fine?" Well, he had to try, didn't he?

Turning on his heel, the Japanese man hurried down the hall, having to stop and wait as the Wet Carpet slowly followed after, still looking woozy. With a grunt of irritation, the man (very carefully) lifted the beast in his arms and absentmindedly scratched his ears, speaking in rough baby talk. "The stupid Wet Carpet wants food because he got whacked this afternoon. Well, he gets his revenge for that by not letting me get what I want. Well, he'll get some food and then I'll get dessert."

? * * *

Hilde raised her finger to touch the doorbell again. "Geez, is anyone home?"

As her finger touched the ringer, the door opened and a very disheveled Duo opened it. "We don't want any?Oh, hey, babe. Come in."

Shocked by her husband's exhausted exterior, Hilde entered (after dropping several suitcases), cupping his face in her hands. "Duo, are you okay?"

"Coffee?Paperwork?Heero broke out of jail."

A small hand found Duo's shirt. "Uncle Duo, why was Daddy arrested?"

The man looked down at the small blonde headed boy. "He?" Then he yawned mightily. "It's too complicated, kid."

Ryan blinked and turned to his sister. She stood looking around at the grand staircase, most likely judging the railing. It was definitely good for sliding later on. "Cat? Why was Daddy arrested?"

She sighed and folded her arms, tossing her dark hair. "He probably got mistaken for someone who was breaking in. It's not the first time."

A look of recognition flowed through the boy's features. He remembered vaguely a baseball bat and very pained Heero Yuy. His mother had a good swing.

Cat reached a hand out to catch her little brother's smaller one. "Common, I'm hungry."

Just then, the two children watched as a disoriented Heero Yuy walked by, holding a mass of fur and rubbing its ears fondly as he spoke in a soft monotone. Ryan blinked, then turned to Duo. "Uncle, why is Daddy talking to a cat?"

The American blinked and stared, wishing he had a video camera. Slowly shaking his head, he formulated the only answer he knew. "I have absolutely no idea, Ryan."

Cat just blinked, recognizing some of her father's quirks in herself with a wince. She really had to keep from getting like her dad.

Hilde, who had exited the large entrance hall to search for Relena, now returned. "I think I went in a circle. Geez, Quatre has expensive taste?"

"More like Aunt Dorothy," Catherine muttered before pulling her brother into another adjoining hallway. Ryan raised his blonde-locked head and gazed around the mansion, taking in the paintings and designs. He paled a bit, remembering that there was a scary room with lots of dead animal heads, just down the hall. The memory of Daddy striding around the room with a deer head on still gave the small boy the creeps. For some reason, though, he was chasing Cat, and Cat had been laughing (as had their mommy)? Cat still laughed, too, whenever that incident was brought up.

The dark-headed girl's thoughts were following the same line as her brother's, though she was smirking to herself. She was the only person in the world to actually make a Heero-proof trap and live to tell the tale.

"'Nee-san?"

Cat glanced at her brother. "Hn?"

"Can we get some ice cream?"

"Hn."

"Good. Do they have mint-chocolate chip?"

"Hn."

"Good."

After a comfortable silence, the two siblings entered the kitchen, pushing the swinging door aside. Heero, who must have come from another direction, set down the disheveled cat and was now looking for something in the cabinet.

"Hey Daddy!" Ryan shouted in joy, launching himself at the ex-Gundam Pilot.

"Hey Ryan," the man said before hugging the little boy hurriedly. "Do you know where the cat food is?"

Ryan blinked. Was he supposed to know? And why was Daddy in such a hurry?

"Hey Dad."

Heero rose to his full height to hug his daughter, who must have grown some after the week vacation. Growth spurts. "Catherine. Do you know???"

"No, sir," she stated, pulling ice cream down from the freezer.

Heero scowled. Ice cream this late? "No ice cream."

Catherine sighed but did nothing. Hopefully Ryan would pull the puppy-dog eyes and get their father to change his mind.

"But Daddy?"

The girl smirked, hiding her face in the freezer. Here is comes?

"I said 'no.' You shouldn't have ice cream this late."

"Because of the time change, it's only six in the evening to us, Daddy." Cat held a straight face, careful to add the extra ?dy to her father's title.

"Yeah! What Cat said!"

Heero scowled. Heero frowned. Heero held a straight face. Heero's lips turned upward into a smile. "Fine," he sighed. The kids really must have taken classes from their mother? This was really embarrassing. It was almost as embarrassing as when Catherine managed to drop a deer head on his own? Well, not that embarrassing.

Ryan, happily watching as his sister scooped out ice cream, sat at a chair, swinging his legs and kicking the rungs. Duo entered the kitchen, looking as if he had lost something. "Where is my wife?" he asked himself under his breath.

"Uncle Duo, do you know where the cat food is?"

"Have no idea kid."

"Do you know why Daddy is in such a hurry?"

"I don't know what goes through your dad's mind at all."

Duo muttered something else before exiting the kitchen out another door.

"Murow." Cat blinked, setting the scooper back in the box before handing the bowl to her brother. "Hello there," she said to the ball of fluff. "What's your name, you piece of carpet?" The monster purred and rubbed against her groggily.

Across the kitchen, Heero raised his head. Weird? Cat must have been more like him than he imagined.

Duo entered the kitchen again from the other direction. "I hate this house."

"Uncle Duo, what's the cat's name?"

"I dunno. I thought it was Winston?" he voice trailed off when he realized Ryan was not longer listening to him, tucked greedily into his ice cream. "Heero, buddy," he said. "Have you seen my wife pass through here?"

"Probably with Relena? Where is that dam??darn cat food?"

Ryan yawned. Catherine yawned. "Uncle Duo, just stay in the kitchen." She licked her spoon before putting up the ice cream box. Taking the bowl with her, the girl plopped down on the armrest of a chair.

Heero scowled. "Sit in the chair, not on the side."

Cat sighed and did as she was told. Duo blinked, thinking over what she said sleepily before deciding to make more coffee. "Why should I wait here?"

"Soon or later, Aunt Hilde will need to eat food. She'd starve otherwise."

Duo was too tired to roll his eyes. "Sure?"

"Here it is!"

Everyone turned to see Heero holding up a box of cat food triumphanty. "Come here, Wet Carpet!"

The cat slowly walked over to his now filled bowl and bent to eat after nuzzling his hand in thanks. With that, Heero rose, patting the beast on the back affectionately.

Ryan yawned again. "Daddy, I'm sleepy."

He scowled. "I thought it was supposed to feel like six?"

"Aunt Hilde let us watch soap operas last night?the ones she taped," stated Cat.

A frown played across his features. "Alright. Finish!"

They did, Ryan groaning in pain from a brain-freeze. Duo stood slumped over the counter, exhausted, and Heero paced back and forth, looking at his watch. Cat took her time, smiling mentally at her father's discomfort. After what felt like eternity for the Japanese man, both of his children were done. Grabbing each one by an arm, he nearly hauled them upstairs, raced back downstairs to get the suitcases, then ran back upstairs with the suitcases. In a record of 15 minutes, the kids were in the bed.

He stopped when he saw Hilde walking toward him. "Did you find Duo?"

She smiled affectionately. "He's in bed, sleeping like a baby, muttering about paperwork."

"Hn."

"Ryan and Cat were angels?except that Cat?um?well, she managed to someone wind up throwing the mail man in the pool covered in chicken feathers. But that was it."

"Hn." Chicken feathers? Odd?

But he had a lot more important things to get to now. Standing around contemplating chicken feathers and mailmen would not get him anywhere.

Hilde turned and stared at the empty hallway around her. She had never seen anyone move that fast.

The very impatient ex-Gundam Pilot shoved the door open, standing at the entrance and casting light on the bed and the figure within?only to find the occupant dead asleep. Heero scowled, then sighed. He yanked the majority of his clothes off before collapsing next to his wife??

Only to bury his face in fur. "Murow."

With a sigh of absolute surrender, the man rolled over and fell asleep, tucking the purring Wet Carpet under his arm.



To be continued... (About two more chapters, i think...)

So, does that satisfy WC and HEero interaction? I tried to make it cute.

Yay! First reviewer! I'm still lovin' it! Keep it up!

Aww.... He-he-he.... Lovin' this!!

Can't wait to see more!!