What Matters Most
Posted: Mon Sep 22, 2003 7:22 am
<b>Disclaimer:</b> It hasn't changed, i still don't own GW after years of obsessing over it. So, put a leash on that lawsuit and leave me be to wallow in my misery.
<b>Note:</b> Ok, this is a peace offering to those who had suffered under the onslaught of angst after angst i had barraged this forum with. And no, i didn't write this because Heero coldcocked me and turned me over to Dr. J to be injected with the fluff tranquilizer and whatnot. Hehe. I just wanted to shed some light on my rather dark and angsty world of writings. And i felt really bad after. See? The evil Queen of Angst can feel remorse too! I've had this stranged idea floating around my head for a while now so i thought i might as well get it out of there. Well, peace! And enjoy!
Oh yeah, i apologize if there's some grammatical error or spelling errors. I never have anyone beta my works. I hope it's readable. I do apologize in advance though just in case.
<b>Title:</b> What Matters Most
<b>Rating:</b> General
<b>Pairing:</b> 1xR
?Daddy?daddy?? A small voice whined in the dark, followed by miniature fingers poking hard flesh. ?Wake up, daddy.?
Beneath the covers, a man grunted as he rolled over and forced himself to full consciousness. Sometimes, he thought to himself grimly, being a father was a pain in the ass. He looked down at the small, desperate face peeking up at him eagerly from a low height and immediately felt his insides turn to mush. Damn. The small boy had fully captured his wife?s look. The look that made aquamarine eyes glisten with unshed tears and brought him to his knees faster than a speeding bullet. With another grunt just to appease his mood, he detached himself from his wife?s embrace and faced his son.
?Alex, didn?t we just get rid of them last week??
?But daddy, I swear we must?ve forgotten his brother. I can hear him. Really, I can!? Alexander Yuy swore as solemnly as his 6 years of limited maturity would allow. ?Maybe he knows I told you to get rid of his brother.? His eyes widened in horror at the thought that dawned on him. ?Do you think he wants revenge??
Heero sighed resignedly even as he fought the urge to chuckle in amusement at his child?s wild musings. He ruffled the mass of rumpled dark hair that was very much like his own and ushered the boy out of the room. He dragged sweatpants over his hips and reached for his gun in the locked drawer of his nightstand. He looked in on Relena to make sure she was still asleep before following his son into his own room. Not that it mattered whether she was asleep or not. Soon enough, she would be awakened.
?Alright, stand back and let?s take care of him.? He muttered to the small child as he eased himself into the darkened room. ?Close your eyes now, Alex. You know he?s way too ugly for you to see. Then you?ll have more nightmares.? He made a show of rustling the sheets as he peeked under the small bed and pretended to drag a heavy monster out of the dark space. ?Hm. He does look a lot like the one last week. Maybe you?re right. He must be the brother.? He couldn?t believe it had come to this.
He glanced at his son to make sure he had his eyes closed and an additional small hand covering it just in case he happened to slit them open. Heero smiled indulgently even as he made a shuffling sound that indicated he was dragging a heavy weight out of the room. ?Let?s get rid of this ugly creature so we can both get back to sleep. Your mom won?t be happy when we wake her.?
They made their way out into the dark backyard with little Alex holding on to Heero?s large callused hand. All the while, Alex kept his eyes shut and trusted his father to keep all the monsters away from him. To him, his father was very much able to slay dragons with nothing but one of his glares he sometimes used on his own mother when she became stubborn about something daddy was very adamant about. He had been lucky so far not to receive them from his father and prayed with all his heart that he would never earn the bad luck to do so. His uncle Duo earned them quite frequently and although he was as large a man as his father, his uncle still trembled in his boots.
A shot rang out to break the silence of the night and Alex barely flinched. In fact, he let out a breath of relief. ?Is it done, daddy?? He queried cautiously.
?He won?t bother you anymore, Alex.? Heero answered in reply. ?Ok, back to bed. Paygan will take care of him in the morning.?
?Can Paygan bury him with his brother, daddy? I feel kinda bad for the guy. Do you think Paygan will do it??
Heero fought hard to retain the serious look on his face at the child?s heartfelt question and guilt. ?I?ll make sure Paygan will do it in the morning. Now, get going.?
He watched his son climbed into bed and get settled again. He fought the urge to gather the small child in his arms. He still retained the control of a soldier even after he had married the only woman to ever make his heart beat. And this child they had created together seemed so precious and simply priceless, taking his breath away at the sight of him. For a moment, a brooding look crossed his face as he vowed silently to himself that he would give his life to protect his own child?s. He vowed that those who even had a passing thought of hurting Alex would have his life end on the spot. To Heero, nothing touches those that mattered to him most. Relena and their child was unquestionably on the top of that priority list. He would die without them, period.
The boy took in his father?s dark look and became concerned. ?Daddy, is everything ok??
Heero shook his mood away and went to his son, granting him a rare smile. ?Hn.?
Alex smiled back with all the expressive emotions of gratitude and love. ?Thank you, Daddy.? And with a quick movement, reached up and threw his arms around the slightly unbalanced Heero. After a few awkward attempts to feel comfortable with the contact, Heero finally returned the embrace and closed his eyes as if to cherish the emotions that ran through him in frightening fluency. He was terrified that such a vulnerable being depended on him to rid him of his monsters under the bed. But so far, he had managed to do just that.
?Goodnight, Alex.? He whispered gruffly as he untangled himself from the child?s embrace.
?Goodnight, Daddy.? The child whispered as sleep beckoned him. ?I love you?
?I love you, too.? He whispered with surprising ease. Relena had taught him the value of saying the words so that the child grew up without doubts.
He closed the door softly.
?Another monster under the bed??
A voice whispered in the dark as he entered the room he shared with his wife. The tone was amused with just a hint of tenderness. He shed himself of the sweatpants and followed the sound of the warm voice. Then he sighed with overwhelming content as he gathered the warmth of her body in his arms. He had no doubt that this was where he belonged.
?A brother of the one from last week.?
?I see.? He felt her body tremble with restrained laughter. ?So you dragged the brother out and shot him too, huh?
?He made me promise to tell Paygan that the brothers should be buried together.?
She was unable to remain serious and laughed outright, the sound making Heero smile although he hid it in the dark.
?Heero?? Her voice became gentle, reverent, so loving that it made him ache inside. ?You have no idea how much that kid of yours loves you. He thinks you can slay dragons and walk on water. And the fact that you can shoot his monsters under the bed just confirms it for him.?
Heero became uncomfortable with the idea. ?I?m not a good father??
But that was as far he got when Relena bolted upright and perfectly mimicked his death glare. She was furious. ?Don?t you dare! Oh, Heero?? She laid her crown of soft blonde head on his chest, levelled with the beating of his heart. ?A kid can?t ask for a better father than one who can rid him of his monsters. Your past doesn?t matter to him, darling. It doesn?t have to matter to him. And you don?t have to hide from him who you are. Because he?ll love you and adore you and worship you just for you. He?s a child, Heero. And children can see with untainted eyes. With clear eyes. And he sees in you a man that is worth all his admiration. A man worth all his love.?
He fought the emotions that roiled inside his guts at her words. ?I can?t guarantee his safety?I?I?m afraid of failing him, Relena. Of failing you.?
That painful admission struck Relena like a jolt of lightning straight to the heart. She closed her eyes tightly against the wave of sorrow that caught her throat and made it hard to speak. Heero?
?Nobody can guarantee any of our safety, darling. Not even you. But it?s enough for us to know that you?ll damn well try your hardest to protect us. With everything in you. We don?t expect perfection, Heero. God, no.? She tightened her hold on him as if afraid that a slip of her arms might cause him to blow away like the wind. ?You?ll never disappoint us. We love you. And nothing can or will ever change that fact. And it?s more than enough for us to know that you love us as well. That?s all we?ll ever ask of you.? She raised her head from his chest and looked into his eyes, willing him to understand.
?Shhh?? He dropped a gentle kiss on her trembling mouth, wanting to erase the pain he had caused to fade away. ?I?m just not use to having this much to care about. To having my very existence depend on yours and our child?s.? He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. ?God Relena, he?s so vulnerable.?
?That?s where you?re wrong.? She countered. ?He takes after his father, you know. All courage and heart with so little fear. Another child would have wept and cried for his mother after finding monsters under his bed. But our little Alex went to his father and dealt with his nightmares more directly. Now, have you ever heard of a child who can have his father shoot the annoying monsters instead of crying and hiding behind a mother?s skirts? Trust me, our Alex is tougher than an average kid. Just wait and see when he grows up.?
The pride in her voice made Heero?s chest swelled with the same emotion.
?And he?s not the only one who?s lucky, Heero.? She whispered tentatively while letting her hand drift over his body. ?I have you to slay my own demons as well. And everyday I never fail to thank god that I managed to find you in such a chaotic world somehow. Having you by my side everyday, fighting with me and walking with me every step of the way, I swear that no other woman in the world is as lucky as I.?
Was it any wonder why he loved this woman to death? She gave him a reason to breathe.
?Relena?what would I do without you??
?Stay single for the rest of your life, I hope.?
He chuckled softly, cradling the length of her body to his and cherishing every curve of her feminine form. ?And what would you do without me??
She puckered her brows together as if giving it a great thought. ?Well, I suppose there?s always Duo. Or Trowa for that matter. He?s got those killer green eyes that all women seem to just drool??
His mouth came down on hers to put a halt to her offending joke. Relena swallowed her amusement and opened her mouth under the onslaught. When he pulled back, she grunted in protest. And only relaxed again when she managed to pull his head back down to ravage her.
They were planning on having dinner with his former comrades tomorrow night, Heero thought narrowly, he had to arrange to have Maxwell and Barton sit at the other end of the table from him and Relena. He didn?t want them near his wife and he didn?t want them near him for their own safeties. Then he chuckled inwardly at his violent thoughts. Relena was his and his alone. He would grow old never doubting this.
The End.
<b>Note:</b> Ok, this is a peace offering to those who had suffered under the onslaught of angst after angst i had barraged this forum with. And no, i didn't write this because Heero coldcocked me and turned me over to Dr. J to be injected with the fluff tranquilizer and whatnot. Hehe. I just wanted to shed some light on my rather dark and angsty world of writings. And i felt really bad after. See? The evil Queen of Angst can feel remorse too! I've had this stranged idea floating around my head for a while now so i thought i might as well get it out of there. Well, peace! And enjoy!
Oh yeah, i apologize if there's some grammatical error or spelling errors. I never have anyone beta my works. I hope it's readable. I do apologize in advance though just in case.
<b>Title:</b> What Matters Most
<b>Rating:</b> General
<b>Pairing:</b> 1xR
?Daddy?daddy?? A small voice whined in the dark, followed by miniature fingers poking hard flesh. ?Wake up, daddy.?
Beneath the covers, a man grunted as he rolled over and forced himself to full consciousness. Sometimes, he thought to himself grimly, being a father was a pain in the ass. He looked down at the small, desperate face peeking up at him eagerly from a low height and immediately felt his insides turn to mush. Damn. The small boy had fully captured his wife?s look. The look that made aquamarine eyes glisten with unshed tears and brought him to his knees faster than a speeding bullet. With another grunt just to appease his mood, he detached himself from his wife?s embrace and faced his son.
?Alex, didn?t we just get rid of them last week??
?But daddy, I swear we must?ve forgotten his brother. I can hear him. Really, I can!? Alexander Yuy swore as solemnly as his 6 years of limited maturity would allow. ?Maybe he knows I told you to get rid of his brother.? His eyes widened in horror at the thought that dawned on him. ?Do you think he wants revenge??
Heero sighed resignedly even as he fought the urge to chuckle in amusement at his child?s wild musings. He ruffled the mass of rumpled dark hair that was very much like his own and ushered the boy out of the room. He dragged sweatpants over his hips and reached for his gun in the locked drawer of his nightstand. He looked in on Relena to make sure she was still asleep before following his son into his own room. Not that it mattered whether she was asleep or not. Soon enough, she would be awakened.
?Alright, stand back and let?s take care of him.? He muttered to the small child as he eased himself into the darkened room. ?Close your eyes now, Alex. You know he?s way too ugly for you to see. Then you?ll have more nightmares.? He made a show of rustling the sheets as he peeked under the small bed and pretended to drag a heavy monster out of the dark space. ?Hm. He does look a lot like the one last week. Maybe you?re right. He must be the brother.? He couldn?t believe it had come to this.
He glanced at his son to make sure he had his eyes closed and an additional small hand covering it just in case he happened to slit them open. Heero smiled indulgently even as he made a shuffling sound that indicated he was dragging a heavy weight out of the room. ?Let?s get rid of this ugly creature so we can both get back to sleep. Your mom won?t be happy when we wake her.?
They made their way out into the dark backyard with little Alex holding on to Heero?s large callused hand. All the while, Alex kept his eyes shut and trusted his father to keep all the monsters away from him. To him, his father was very much able to slay dragons with nothing but one of his glares he sometimes used on his own mother when she became stubborn about something daddy was very adamant about. He had been lucky so far not to receive them from his father and prayed with all his heart that he would never earn the bad luck to do so. His uncle Duo earned them quite frequently and although he was as large a man as his father, his uncle still trembled in his boots.
A shot rang out to break the silence of the night and Alex barely flinched. In fact, he let out a breath of relief. ?Is it done, daddy?? He queried cautiously.
?He won?t bother you anymore, Alex.? Heero answered in reply. ?Ok, back to bed. Paygan will take care of him in the morning.?
?Can Paygan bury him with his brother, daddy? I feel kinda bad for the guy. Do you think Paygan will do it??
Heero fought hard to retain the serious look on his face at the child?s heartfelt question and guilt. ?I?ll make sure Paygan will do it in the morning. Now, get going.?
He watched his son climbed into bed and get settled again. He fought the urge to gather the small child in his arms. He still retained the control of a soldier even after he had married the only woman to ever make his heart beat. And this child they had created together seemed so precious and simply priceless, taking his breath away at the sight of him. For a moment, a brooding look crossed his face as he vowed silently to himself that he would give his life to protect his own child?s. He vowed that those who even had a passing thought of hurting Alex would have his life end on the spot. To Heero, nothing touches those that mattered to him most. Relena and their child was unquestionably on the top of that priority list. He would die without them, period.
The boy took in his father?s dark look and became concerned. ?Daddy, is everything ok??
Heero shook his mood away and went to his son, granting him a rare smile. ?Hn.?
Alex smiled back with all the expressive emotions of gratitude and love. ?Thank you, Daddy.? And with a quick movement, reached up and threw his arms around the slightly unbalanced Heero. After a few awkward attempts to feel comfortable with the contact, Heero finally returned the embrace and closed his eyes as if to cherish the emotions that ran through him in frightening fluency. He was terrified that such a vulnerable being depended on him to rid him of his monsters under the bed. But so far, he had managed to do just that.
?Goodnight, Alex.? He whispered gruffly as he untangled himself from the child?s embrace.
?Goodnight, Daddy.? The child whispered as sleep beckoned him. ?I love you?
?I love you, too.? He whispered with surprising ease. Relena had taught him the value of saying the words so that the child grew up without doubts.
He closed the door softly.
?Another monster under the bed??
A voice whispered in the dark as he entered the room he shared with his wife. The tone was amused with just a hint of tenderness. He shed himself of the sweatpants and followed the sound of the warm voice. Then he sighed with overwhelming content as he gathered the warmth of her body in his arms. He had no doubt that this was where he belonged.
?A brother of the one from last week.?
?I see.? He felt her body tremble with restrained laughter. ?So you dragged the brother out and shot him too, huh?
?He made me promise to tell Paygan that the brothers should be buried together.?
She was unable to remain serious and laughed outright, the sound making Heero smile although he hid it in the dark.
?Heero?? Her voice became gentle, reverent, so loving that it made him ache inside. ?You have no idea how much that kid of yours loves you. He thinks you can slay dragons and walk on water. And the fact that you can shoot his monsters under the bed just confirms it for him.?
Heero became uncomfortable with the idea. ?I?m not a good father??
But that was as far he got when Relena bolted upright and perfectly mimicked his death glare. She was furious. ?Don?t you dare! Oh, Heero?? She laid her crown of soft blonde head on his chest, levelled with the beating of his heart. ?A kid can?t ask for a better father than one who can rid him of his monsters. Your past doesn?t matter to him, darling. It doesn?t have to matter to him. And you don?t have to hide from him who you are. Because he?ll love you and adore you and worship you just for you. He?s a child, Heero. And children can see with untainted eyes. With clear eyes. And he sees in you a man that is worth all his admiration. A man worth all his love.?
He fought the emotions that roiled inside his guts at her words. ?I can?t guarantee his safety?I?I?m afraid of failing him, Relena. Of failing you.?
That painful admission struck Relena like a jolt of lightning straight to the heart. She closed her eyes tightly against the wave of sorrow that caught her throat and made it hard to speak. Heero?
?Nobody can guarantee any of our safety, darling. Not even you. But it?s enough for us to know that you?ll damn well try your hardest to protect us. With everything in you. We don?t expect perfection, Heero. God, no.? She tightened her hold on him as if afraid that a slip of her arms might cause him to blow away like the wind. ?You?ll never disappoint us. We love you. And nothing can or will ever change that fact. And it?s more than enough for us to know that you love us as well. That?s all we?ll ever ask of you.? She raised her head from his chest and looked into his eyes, willing him to understand.
?Shhh?? He dropped a gentle kiss on her trembling mouth, wanting to erase the pain he had caused to fade away. ?I?m just not use to having this much to care about. To having my very existence depend on yours and our child?s.? He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. ?God Relena, he?s so vulnerable.?
?That?s where you?re wrong.? She countered. ?He takes after his father, you know. All courage and heart with so little fear. Another child would have wept and cried for his mother after finding monsters under his bed. But our little Alex went to his father and dealt with his nightmares more directly. Now, have you ever heard of a child who can have his father shoot the annoying monsters instead of crying and hiding behind a mother?s skirts? Trust me, our Alex is tougher than an average kid. Just wait and see when he grows up.?
The pride in her voice made Heero?s chest swelled with the same emotion.
?And he?s not the only one who?s lucky, Heero.? She whispered tentatively while letting her hand drift over his body. ?I have you to slay my own demons as well. And everyday I never fail to thank god that I managed to find you in such a chaotic world somehow. Having you by my side everyday, fighting with me and walking with me every step of the way, I swear that no other woman in the world is as lucky as I.?
Was it any wonder why he loved this woman to death? She gave him a reason to breathe.
?Relena?what would I do without you??
?Stay single for the rest of your life, I hope.?
He chuckled softly, cradling the length of her body to his and cherishing every curve of her feminine form. ?And what would you do without me??
She puckered her brows together as if giving it a great thought. ?Well, I suppose there?s always Duo. Or Trowa for that matter. He?s got those killer green eyes that all women seem to just drool??
His mouth came down on hers to put a halt to her offending joke. Relena swallowed her amusement and opened her mouth under the onslaught. When he pulled back, she grunted in protest. And only relaxed again when she managed to pull his head back down to ravage her.
They were planning on having dinner with his former comrades tomorrow night, Heero thought narrowly, he had to arrange to have Maxwell and Barton sit at the other end of the table from him and Relena. He didn?t want them near his wife and he didn?t want them near him for their own safeties. Then he chuckled inwardly at his violent thoughts. Relena was his and his alone. He would grow old never doubting this.
The End.
Alex was adorable beyond words.
.Just checking.