(D2 Entry) Cuts and Pipes
Posted: Sun May 04, 2003 3:38 am
Title: Cuts and Pipes
Penname: suicide_baka
E-mail: suicide_baka@hotmail.com
Catergories: Best Comedy, Best One-shot
Warnings: some language
"God Damnit!!" Shouted Duo. Here he was, fixing the pipes in his bathroom at Relena's mansion and now he was soaking wet.
"Relena is so damn rich, why can't she just call someone to fix it?"
"Are you not MAN enough to fix a pipe Maxwell?"
"Shut up Wufei and get away from me."
Wufei smirked as Duo yelped as the water squirted in his face again. Duo glared at the pipe and remembered that Wufei was in the room. He gave his best smile and bashed his eyelashes.
"Wufei, you wouldn't mind helping me, would you?"
Wufei rasied his eyebrow as Duo got on his knees and brought his hands together.
"Please Wufei I'm begging you."
Wufei rolled his eyes and walked over to help him.
"Wipe that grin off your face Maxwell. I doing this for the sake of all men."
Duo wrapped his arms around Wufei.
"I'll do whatever you want Wu Wu."
"Kisama!"
Meanwhile, Relena and Hilde just walked back into the house with Relena wimpering something about her wrist.
"I know it was an accident Hilde but that really hurt. If only Trowa wasn't trying to drink his coffee and pour some in another cup in his hand and laughing at the same time."
"So he dropped the cup and it cut you?"
"Yea."
"Let's go to the bathroom and check this out."
"Damn you Maxwell! I said not to turn the knob that way!" Wufei cried as he was squirted in the face with water for the tenth time.
"Sorry. So this way right?"
Wufei was drowned out by the water once again.
"That's it. I quit."
"You can't quit!"
"Watch me!"
"What kind of man are you!?"
Wufei stopped and was about to strangle Duo's neck when he heard voices.
"Do you hear that?"
"You mean the sounds of the soft singing of the angels who are waiting to take me to heaven?"
"Will you shut up?"
Wufei let go of Duo's neck and bent down towards the pipes. Duo later went down to join him. They both had their ears to the pipes as they listened.
"Do you think I stand out to much?"
"You never know. It could get bigger."
Duo stood back up and rubbed his wet hair.
"Ah it's just the girls talking."
"Shut up."
"Wufei we have bigger problems here if you haven't noticed."
"What are the girls talking about?"
"Huh?"
Duo bent back down to listen to the rest of the conversation.
"Oh man. This is all Trowa's fault."
"Calm down Relena. It's not that bad. Lot's of people get them."
"What the hell are they talking about?" Whispered Duo.
"Shhhh."
"I really want to get rid of it. Maybe I should ask Sally for help. She is a doctor after all."
"Yeah your right but maybe getting rid of it would make it a bigger problem."
"If only me and Trowa weren't fooling around and having fun."
Right then and there, Duo and Wufei both tried to stand up but hit their head on the sink.
"Ow." Said Duo as he rubbed the bumb on his head.
"Maxwell do you know what this means!?"
"That i'm 3% dumber now?"
"NO!"
"Then what?"
"Relena's pregant!"
Duo gave Wufei a questionable look until it finally sunk in and his eyes widdened.
"You mean?"
"Yes."
"Oh my god! With Trowa?"
Wufei nodded his head.
"Daaamn!"
"Maxwell, not one word to Yuy about this."
"Huh..oh right. I understand."
"Barton is a dead man once Yuy finds out."
"What if I find out about what?" Said a dark voice from behind.
Wufei and Duo spun around to find Heero leaning against the door with his arms folded.
"That Relena's pregant with Trowa's baby and I..wasn't..supposed...to tell.....you...........................sorry."
"Maxwell!"
"She's what?!"
With that said, Heero ran downstairs looking for Relena.
Relena came walking out of the bathroom with ointment on her wrist.
"Does it still hurt?"
"Little."
Relena and Hilde walked into the Den where everyone was sitting and watching TV.
"What's wrong with your hand Relena?" Asked Quatra.
DING DONG
"Could you get that?"
Hilde walked over to the door and in came Trowa.
"Trowa?"
He was holding some bandages under his arm and medicine with Sally right behind him. He grabbed Relena's arm and looked it over.
"Really Trowa, it isn't that serious."
Sally started to examine the cut.
"I'm sorry Relena. I guess I got carried away."
"Damn right you did!!"
Trowa wasn't able to respond for Heero's fist did it for him. Down went Trowa and here came Heero. Everyone ran over to see if Trowa was okay.
"Heero what the hell do you think you are doing?"
"What i'm thinking? What the hell were you two thinking?!"
"What are you talking about?"
Zechs and Noin came rushing in after hearing everyone's screaming.
"What's going on here?" Shouted Zechs.
Duo went up to Relena and sat down next to her.
"Lena, we all know about your little problem."
"You do?"
"Yea and I personally think that it's...wonderful."
Relena raised an eyebrow.
"What? Why? Duo don't you realize that I am now scared for life?"
Heero was getting hotter at every moment.
"Yeah but Lena, mostly eveyone here is going to get one."
"Your probably right. But I still want it to go away."
"You could always go for adoption."
"Adoption?"
"Yeah."
Zechs took the time to just go right to the facts.
"What the hell is going on here?"
"Relena's pregant." said Wufei.
Relena looked shocked.
"I am?!"
Everyone looked back.
"You are?!"
"Yes you are and it's Trowa's baby!" said Duo.
Relena looked at Trowa.
"Okay one, i'm not pregant, and two, if I was, it wouldn't be Trowa's."
"So..your not?" asked Heero. Nobody noticed but Duo was holding on to him the whole time.
Relena laughed.
"Of course not. Where in the world did you get the idea in the first place?"
Duo pointed his fingers at Wufei and everyone looked at him for an explanation.
"I was helping Maxwell with the pipes and we heard you and Hilde talking about something that happened between you and Trowa."
Relena and Trowa both laughed. Trowa grabbed Relena's arm and showed everyone the cut.
"I accidently hurt Relena and gave her a cut that's all."
Duo burst out laughing as Heero finally calmed down.
"Heero, don't you owe Trowa an apology?"
"For what?"
Trowa rubbed his bruised cheek.
"For this."
Heero smirked.
"Since she isn't pregant then that is for cutting her in the first place."
Wufei rubbed the back of his head.
"So there isn't any baby to get rid of?"
Relena smiled and shook her head.
"It was just a cut?"
Trowa walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulder.
"Yes but we decided to keep it and name is after you."
End
Penname: suicide_baka
E-mail: suicide_baka@hotmail.com
Catergories: Best Comedy, Best One-shot
Warnings: some language
"God Damnit!!" Shouted Duo. Here he was, fixing the pipes in his bathroom at Relena's mansion and now he was soaking wet.
"Relena is so damn rich, why can't she just call someone to fix it?"
"Are you not MAN enough to fix a pipe Maxwell?"
"Shut up Wufei and get away from me."
Wufei smirked as Duo yelped as the water squirted in his face again. Duo glared at the pipe and remembered that Wufei was in the room. He gave his best smile and bashed his eyelashes.
"Wufei, you wouldn't mind helping me, would you?"
Wufei rasied his eyebrow as Duo got on his knees and brought his hands together.
"Please Wufei I'm begging you."
Wufei rolled his eyes and walked over to help him.
"Wipe that grin off your face Maxwell. I doing this for the sake of all men."
Duo wrapped his arms around Wufei.
"I'll do whatever you want Wu Wu."
"Kisama!"
Meanwhile, Relena and Hilde just walked back into the house with Relena wimpering something about her wrist.
"I know it was an accident Hilde but that really hurt. If only Trowa wasn't trying to drink his coffee and pour some in another cup in his hand and laughing at the same time."
"So he dropped the cup and it cut you?"
"Yea."
"Let's go to the bathroom and check this out."
"Damn you Maxwell! I said not to turn the knob that way!" Wufei cried as he was squirted in the face with water for the tenth time.
"Sorry. So this way right?"
Wufei was drowned out by the water once again.
"That's it. I quit."
"You can't quit!"
"Watch me!"
"What kind of man are you!?"
Wufei stopped and was about to strangle Duo's neck when he heard voices.
"Do you hear that?"
"You mean the sounds of the soft singing of the angels who are waiting to take me to heaven?"
"Will you shut up?"
Wufei let go of Duo's neck and bent down towards the pipes. Duo later went down to join him. They both had their ears to the pipes as they listened.
"Do you think I stand out to much?"
"You never know. It could get bigger."
Duo stood back up and rubbed his wet hair.
"Ah it's just the girls talking."
"Shut up."
"Wufei we have bigger problems here if you haven't noticed."
"What are the girls talking about?"
"Huh?"
Duo bent back down to listen to the rest of the conversation.
"Oh man. This is all Trowa's fault."
"Calm down Relena. It's not that bad. Lot's of people get them."
"What the hell are they talking about?" Whispered Duo.
"Shhhh."
"I really want to get rid of it. Maybe I should ask Sally for help. She is a doctor after all."
"Yeah your right but maybe getting rid of it would make it a bigger problem."
"If only me and Trowa weren't fooling around and having fun."
Right then and there, Duo and Wufei both tried to stand up but hit their head on the sink.
"Ow." Said Duo as he rubbed the bumb on his head.
"Maxwell do you know what this means!?"
"That i'm 3% dumber now?"
"NO!"
"Then what?"
"Relena's pregant!"
Duo gave Wufei a questionable look until it finally sunk in and his eyes widdened.
"You mean?"
"Yes."
"Oh my god! With Trowa?"
Wufei nodded his head.
"Daaamn!"
"Maxwell, not one word to Yuy about this."
"Huh..oh right. I understand."
"Barton is a dead man once Yuy finds out."
"What if I find out about what?" Said a dark voice from behind.
Wufei and Duo spun around to find Heero leaning against the door with his arms folded.
"That Relena's pregant with Trowa's baby and I..wasn't..supposed...to tell.....you...........................sorry."
"Maxwell!"
"She's what?!"
With that said, Heero ran downstairs looking for Relena.
Relena came walking out of the bathroom with ointment on her wrist.
"Does it still hurt?"
"Little."
Relena and Hilde walked into the Den where everyone was sitting and watching TV.
"What's wrong with your hand Relena?" Asked Quatra.
DING DONG
"Could you get that?"
Hilde walked over to the door and in came Trowa.
"Trowa?"
He was holding some bandages under his arm and medicine with Sally right behind him. He grabbed Relena's arm and looked it over.
"Really Trowa, it isn't that serious."
Sally started to examine the cut.
"I'm sorry Relena. I guess I got carried away."
"Damn right you did!!"
Trowa wasn't able to respond for Heero's fist did it for him. Down went Trowa and here came Heero. Everyone ran over to see if Trowa was okay.
"Heero what the hell do you think you are doing?"
"What i'm thinking? What the hell were you two thinking?!"
"What are you talking about?"
Zechs and Noin came rushing in after hearing everyone's screaming.
"What's going on here?" Shouted Zechs.
Duo went up to Relena and sat down next to her.
"Lena, we all know about your little problem."
"You do?"
"Yea and I personally think that it's...wonderful."
Relena raised an eyebrow.
"What? Why? Duo don't you realize that I am now scared for life?"
Heero was getting hotter at every moment.
"Yeah but Lena, mostly eveyone here is going to get one."
"Your probably right. But I still want it to go away."
"You could always go for adoption."
"Adoption?"
"Yeah."
Zechs took the time to just go right to the facts.
"What the hell is going on here?"
"Relena's pregant." said Wufei.
Relena looked shocked.
"I am?!"
Everyone looked back.
"You are?!"
"Yes you are and it's Trowa's baby!" said Duo.
Relena looked at Trowa.
"Okay one, i'm not pregant, and two, if I was, it wouldn't be Trowa's."
"So..your not?" asked Heero. Nobody noticed but Duo was holding on to him the whole time.
Relena laughed.
"Of course not. Where in the world did you get the idea in the first place?"
Duo pointed his fingers at Wufei and everyone looked at him for an explanation.
"I was helping Maxwell with the pipes and we heard you and Hilde talking about something that happened between you and Trowa."
Relena and Trowa both laughed. Trowa grabbed Relena's arm and showed everyone the cut.
"I accidently hurt Relena and gave her a cut that's all."
Duo burst out laughing as Heero finally calmed down.
"Heero, don't you owe Trowa an apology?"
"For what?"
Trowa rubbed his bruised cheek.
"For this."
Heero smirked.
"Since she isn't pregant then that is for cutting her in the first place."
Wufei rubbed the back of his head.
"So there isn't any baby to get rid of?"
Relena smiled and shook her head.
"It was just a cut?"
Trowa walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulder.
"Yes but we decided to keep it and name is after you."
End