The Symbol of Temptation chapter nine
Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2003 8:53 am
AN: I am cruel. I take forever to write chapters for my fics while you're all left to wait. Well, if this chapter doesn't sate your need for more of this story, I guarantee the next few will. It's about to get ugly. 
Disclaimer: Yadda yadda I don?t own Gundam Wing and so on.
The Symbol of Temptation
Chapter Nine
Everyone Relena called that day asked what had brought on the sudden engagement. She said that it was not sudden. He wondered at that.
Not sudden. What could she mean? Did she, perhaps, want to marry him before that night?
No. It couldn?t be.
Could it?
He stared at her, trying to figure it all out. His feelings. Her feelings. Alex.
Alex.
He shook his head, not wanting to go down that road again. Thinking about Alex only made him mad, and Relena was not happy when he was mad.
Relena must be happy.
It was with that thought in mind that Heero now stood in front of her brother, their eyes locked on to each other like birds of prey. He wanted permission to marry Zechs?s sister. He had no doubt that Zechs must have some questions.
Which was why his silence was unnerving.
Relena stood still beside him, eyeing her brother in a much less hostile way. She was wearing a baby-blue skirt and matching cashmere sweater. Her hands were behind her back, her hair done up in a French Twist. She looked elegant.
Heero fought the urge to look over at her.
?Why do you want to get married?? Zechs?s voice boomed into his mind. He only had one answer.
?I love her.?
?Do you think that is enough??
Relena opened her mouth as if to say something but Zechs raised his hand to prevent her.
?I?m not telling you that you can?t,? he said quietly, ?I just want you to think it through a little more first.?
?The way you and Noin thought it through?? Relena asked, her voice a melody to him. It all still seamed unreal.
They were going to be married in three months.
Zechs slid his eyelids closed, and Heero wondered what was going on behind them. What emotion the thought of his wife and daughter brought forth in him.
?That was different,? he said at last, opening his eyes. ?We weren?t being hunted.?
Relena?s head dropped, and his chest tightened. He continued to fight the urge to look at her, keeping his eyes focused solely on Zechs. If he looked away Zechs might see it as a weakness and change his mind. He couldn?t allow that.
?Heero,? Zechs said, moving his gaze over to his sister, ?You will take care of her??
It didn?t even need to be asked. ?Yes.?
Zechs?s eyes closed again. ?Then I have no objection.?
Relena?s head came up and she smiled at brother, her eyes a bit watery. Heero wondered why she would cry at a moment like this. There was nothing wrong.
He watched her embrace her brother and felt that old pang in his chest again. He still had no identification for it. He thought it might be longing, but that wasn?t consistent enough. It happened at different times when he felt no longing. He also thought it might be jealousy, but that, too, didn?t quite fit.
He guessed he would just have to deal with it. For the rest of his life.
With her.
They often walked hand-in-hand through the halls of the mansion, heading to a place he suspected neither of them knew. There weren?t many places to go, anyway, but he didn?t care where he ended up as long as he was with her. He was comfortable around her now, but still on edge. Her touch was like electricity and he was sure one day he?d die from it.
They?d returned to the mansion the day after they agreed to get married. He wasn?t surprised to find Zechs waiting for them, but Relena was. She didn?t understand the protective nature of soldiers.
It had been three days after they?d returned when she finally brought up the fact that they hadn?t made an announcement to anyone. He told her it would be improper without a ring, especially since she was an important public figure. She told him her public figure was not important. He kissed her then. He didn?t kiss her much.
Kissing, he?d decided, was dangerous.
Kissing brought forth thoughts and desires he?d forbidden himself from until they were married. That?s why he kissed her only when he couldn?t stop himself from doing so. It was taboo. He scolded himself for it.
She merely laughed at him.
Laughter was one of his favorite things now. Especially her laughter. Her face lit up and she became surreal, physically there but somehow far away. He wished he could go with her when she drifted off to sleep, to see her dreams and share in her serenity. But he never could. He merely watched her sleep, basking in her presence.
He thought a lot about their upcoming marriage. From an outside view, he could see how it was sudden. But people on the outside didn?t know. They had no idea. They didn?t know what she meant to him, how she made him feel. How only she made him feel. They couldn?t possibly know what kind of symbol she was to him.
To them, she was the symbol of peace. To him, she was the symbol of life. Of all things good in life.
Including temptation.
Every time he saw her he was tempted, but he stayed as far away from that temptation as possible. Such a thing would be meaningless if it was done only out of lust. He often looked in the mirror and was surprised by his own reflection, by the way he?d changed. The way his thoughts had changed. To think that the love of one woman could change a man so used to be foolish in his eyes. Now her love was all he saw in himself.
And there was only one thing left standing in the way.
As Relena balanced her schedule between work and planning the wedding, Heero searched for Alex. Alex. That name. The name that now haunted him the way hers did, the reasons similar and yet totally opposite. He needed her to feel complete. He also needed to find Alex to feel complete.
He didn?t know for sure if this need was emotional or primal. In a way it was both. He wanted retribution for what happened to Relena, but at the same time he simply felt the need to have dominance over Alex. It was something he found himself unable to explain, and he was tired of trying.
Two weeks after their return he found himself in front of a large window, staring out at the gardens where Noin and Laura were picking flowers together. Heero suspected that Zechs would join them soon. He understood the man?s need to be with them.
Relena was standing next to him. He felt her squeeze his hand, a sign that she wanted him to look at her. He turned his head and braced himself for the rush of feeling that always accompanied the sight of her. When it hit him, he noticed a lock of hair had come loose and fallen down around her face, making her look somewhat delicate. He brought up his hand and brushed the lock behind her ear. He wanted her to look as strong and as powerful as he knew she could be. He?d seen it. He?d tried to kill her for it.
?Do you really think Alex will be there?? she asked. Something in her voice unsettled him.
?Yes,? was his only answer, and he couldn?t help asking, ?Why are you so worried??
Her eyes flashed briefly with fear and uncertainty before she looked away, gazing out the window as he had been.
?I am?frightened,? she said softly, as though she had to force the words. ?I don?t want him there.?
?There?s nothing he can do to hurt you,? he assured her. She glanced back up at him.
?It?s not me that I?m worried about,? she squeezed his hands tightly between hers.
?Huh?? He looked down at their joined hands. ?You?re worried about me??
She nodded.
?Why??
Her watery eyes locked on to his, catching him by surprise with their sudden intensity.
?Because,? she shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. ?He could get to you so easily-?
?Me??
She stared at him like he?d just turned green.
?Yes, you!? she said in disbelief, ?Do you honestly think he?d try to kill me without ?making me pay? first?? He watched the fury he?d become so fond of set in her face. ?That?s all he wants to do. Cause me pain. He doesn?t care who else he hurts or what he has to do. He knows that if I marry you I?ll be happy. Who wouldn?t be happy to get married to someone they love? Not only will he be jealous, he?ll feel like he has some right to ?punish me? for not being ?faithful.? He?s so rich and so influential and he said that if I ever ?betrayed? him he would make sure that-?
?Stop it!?
She looked at him like his new green skin had just caught on fire. He took a breath to calm himself.
Alex?s warped perception of his ?relationship? with Relena was a subject he was overly touchy about.
?I don?t want you to think that way anymore. I can take care of myself. If I don?t, I won?t be able to take care of you, and then I have nothing.?
He closed his eyes to help him resist the urge to kiss her. It always happened at moments like this.
And, as always, she kissed him before he could get away.
* * *
He walked quickly back to his room, scolding himself for his actions. If things kept on like this, three months (now only nine weeks) were just going to get longer and longer. But at least now he knew he wasn?t the only one who was tempted.
He?d have to remember to get a chocolate pie for their honeymoon after that.
When he opened his bedroom door the first thing he saw was the note. Or rather, the envelope that contained the note. He didn?t bother to pick it up by the corners to preserve any possible fingerprints. He knew the author wasn?t that stupid. When he read the note his blood boiled.
She may take your name, but she won?t marry you.
The note itself didn?t get him concerned. He wasn?t even concerned with how he?d gotten into the mansion. What he was concerned about was how he knew which room was which, and which room he was heading to next.
As if on cue, all the blood drained from his face as Relena screamed.
\\\\\I hope you're all enjoying this fic because I'm working really hard! I can't wait 'till it's done now. Ha! Just wait. You'll see. I keep telling you the best is yet to come, and now, it's only a few chapters away. Buahaha! I love the unexpected./////
Disclaimer: Yadda yadda I don?t own Gundam Wing and so on.
The Symbol of Temptation
Chapter Nine
Everyone Relena called that day asked what had brought on the sudden engagement. She said that it was not sudden. He wondered at that.
Not sudden. What could she mean? Did she, perhaps, want to marry him before that night?
No. It couldn?t be.
Could it?
He stared at her, trying to figure it all out. His feelings. Her feelings. Alex.
Alex.
He shook his head, not wanting to go down that road again. Thinking about Alex only made him mad, and Relena was not happy when he was mad.
Relena must be happy.
It was with that thought in mind that Heero now stood in front of her brother, their eyes locked on to each other like birds of prey. He wanted permission to marry Zechs?s sister. He had no doubt that Zechs must have some questions.
Which was why his silence was unnerving.
Relena stood still beside him, eyeing her brother in a much less hostile way. She was wearing a baby-blue skirt and matching cashmere sweater. Her hands were behind her back, her hair done up in a French Twist. She looked elegant.
Heero fought the urge to look over at her.
?Why do you want to get married?? Zechs?s voice boomed into his mind. He only had one answer.
?I love her.?
?Do you think that is enough??
Relena opened her mouth as if to say something but Zechs raised his hand to prevent her.
?I?m not telling you that you can?t,? he said quietly, ?I just want you to think it through a little more first.?
?The way you and Noin thought it through?? Relena asked, her voice a melody to him. It all still seamed unreal.
They were going to be married in three months.
Zechs slid his eyelids closed, and Heero wondered what was going on behind them. What emotion the thought of his wife and daughter brought forth in him.
?That was different,? he said at last, opening his eyes. ?We weren?t being hunted.?
Relena?s head dropped, and his chest tightened. He continued to fight the urge to look at her, keeping his eyes focused solely on Zechs. If he looked away Zechs might see it as a weakness and change his mind. He couldn?t allow that.
?Heero,? Zechs said, moving his gaze over to his sister, ?You will take care of her??
It didn?t even need to be asked. ?Yes.?
Zechs?s eyes closed again. ?Then I have no objection.?
Relena?s head came up and she smiled at brother, her eyes a bit watery. Heero wondered why she would cry at a moment like this. There was nothing wrong.
He watched her embrace her brother and felt that old pang in his chest again. He still had no identification for it. He thought it might be longing, but that wasn?t consistent enough. It happened at different times when he felt no longing. He also thought it might be jealousy, but that, too, didn?t quite fit.
He guessed he would just have to deal with it. For the rest of his life.
With her.
They often walked hand-in-hand through the halls of the mansion, heading to a place he suspected neither of them knew. There weren?t many places to go, anyway, but he didn?t care where he ended up as long as he was with her. He was comfortable around her now, but still on edge. Her touch was like electricity and he was sure one day he?d die from it.
They?d returned to the mansion the day after they agreed to get married. He wasn?t surprised to find Zechs waiting for them, but Relena was. She didn?t understand the protective nature of soldiers.
It had been three days after they?d returned when she finally brought up the fact that they hadn?t made an announcement to anyone. He told her it would be improper without a ring, especially since she was an important public figure. She told him her public figure was not important. He kissed her then. He didn?t kiss her much.
Kissing, he?d decided, was dangerous.
Kissing brought forth thoughts and desires he?d forbidden himself from until they were married. That?s why he kissed her only when he couldn?t stop himself from doing so. It was taboo. He scolded himself for it.
She merely laughed at him.
Laughter was one of his favorite things now. Especially her laughter. Her face lit up and she became surreal, physically there but somehow far away. He wished he could go with her when she drifted off to sleep, to see her dreams and share in her serenity. But he never could. He merely watched her sleep, basking in her presence.
He thought a lot about their upcoming marriage. From an outside view, he could see how it was sudden. But people on the outside didn?t know. They had no idea. They didn?t know what she meant to him, how she made him feel. How only she made him feel. They couldn?t possibly know what kind of symbol she was to him.
To them, she was the symbol of peace. To him, she was the symbol of life. Of all things good in life.
Including temptation.
Every time he saw her he was tempted, but he stayed as far away from that temptation as possible. Such a thing would be meaningless if it was done only out of lust. He often looked in the mirror and was surprised by his own reflection, by the way he?d changed. The way his thoughts had changed. To think that the love of one woman could change a man so used to be foolish in his eyes. Now her love was all he saw in himself.
And there was only one thing left standing in the way.
As Relena balanced her schedule between work and planning the wedding, Heero searched for Alex. Alex. That name. The name that now haunted him the way hers did, the reasons similar and yet totally opposite. He needed her to feel complete. He also needed to find Alex to feel complete.
He didn?t know for sure if this need was emotional or primal. In a way it was both. He wanted retribution for what happened to Relena, but at the same time he simply felt the need to have dominance over Alex. It was something he found himself unable to explain, and he was tired of trying.
Two weeks after their return he found himself in front of a large window, staring out at the gardens where Noin and Laura were picking flowers together. Heero suspected that Zechs would join them soon. He understood the man?s need to be with them.
Relena was standing next to him. He felt her squeeze his hand, a sign that she wanted him to look at her. He turned his head and braced himself for the rush of feeling that always accompanied the sight of her. When it hit him, he noticed a lock of hair had come loose and fallen down around her face, making her look somewhat delicate. He brought up his hand and brushed the lock behind her ear. He wanted her to look as strong and as powerful as he knew she could be. He?d seen it. He?d tried to kill her for it.
?Do you really think Alex will be there?? she asked. Something in her voice unsettled him.
?Yes,? was his only answer, and he couldn?t help asking, ?Why are you so worried??
Her eyes flashed briefly with fear and uncertainty before she looked away, gazing out the window as he had been.
?I am?frightened,? she said softly, as though she had to force the words. ?I don?t want him there.?
?There?s nothing he can do to hurt you,? he assured her. She glanced back up at him.
?It?s not me that I?m worried about,? she squeezed his hands tightly between hers.
?Huh?? He looked down at their joined hands. ?You?re worried about me??
She nodded.
?Why??
Her watery eyes locked on to his, catching him by surprise with their sudden intensity.
?Because,? she shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. ?He could get to you so easily-?
?Me??
She stared at him like he?d just turned green.
?Yes, you!? she said in disbelief, ?Do you honestly think he?d try to kill me without ?making me pay? first?? He watched the fury he?d become so fond of set in her face. ?That?s all he wants to do. Cause me pain. He doesn?t care who else he hurts or what he has to do. He knows that if I marry you I?ll be happy. Who wouldn?t be happy to get married to someone they love? Not only will he be jealous, he?ll feel like he has some right to ?punish me? for not being ?faithful.? He?s so rich and so influential and he said that if I ever ?betrayed? him he would make sure that-?
?Stop it!?
She looked at him like his new green skin had just caught on fire. He took a breath to calm himself.
Alex?s warped perception of his ?relationship? with Relena was a subject he was overly touchy about.
?I don?t want you to think that way anymore. I can take care of myself. If I don?t, I won?t be able to take care of you, and then I have nothing.?
He closed his eyes to help him resist the urge to kiss her. It always happened at moments like this.
And, as always, she kissed him before he could get away.
* * *
He walked quickly back to his room, scolding himself for his actions. If things kept on like this, three months (now only nine weeks) were just going to get longer and longer. But at least now he knew he wasn?t the only one who was tempted.
He?d have to remember to get a chocolate pie for their honeymoon after that.
When he opened his bedroom door the first thing he saw was the note. Or rather, the envelope that contained the note. He didn?t bother to pick it up by the corners to preserve any possible fingerprints. He knew the author wasn?t that stupid. When he read the note his blood boiled.
She may take your name, but she won?t marry you.
The note itself didn?t get him concerned. He wasn?t even concerned with how he?d gotten into the mansion. What he was concerned about was how he knew which room was which, and which room he was heading to next.
As if on cue, all the blood drained from his face as Relena screamed.
\\\\\I hope you're all enjoying this fic because I'm working really hard! I can't wait 'till it's done now. Ha! Just wait. You'll see. I keep telling you the best is yet to come, and now, it's only a few chapters away. Buahaha! I love the unexpected./////
