Continuity: Figurative Brotherhood
Length: One-shot
Pairings: 1xR, 6x9
Prompt: None
Teaser: "Is he still interested in you? I may have been observing you via holographic ocular node, but I saw the way he looked at you on Libra." "Oh?" "I didn't like it." "Oh..."
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5227951/17/ ... rotherhood
Disclaimer: GW = not mine.
Author's Note: This one's for Lillie. Since you're offering to translate for me, this is the best I can do to reciprocate. Hope my 6x9 is up to par. (sweatdrop)
I was going to call this Earth, Wind and Fire (cuz you know, Zechs is Wind and Noin is Fire and they're going back to Earth and that band was awesome xD) but nah.
My humor muse is apparently a jealous bitch. I've been sitting on this for a month and had serious writer's block but once I decided on trying to write something angsty and serious, all these funny ideas came pouring out. Now, my angst muse has gone and crawled back into its shell. Meanwhile, my vidding muse is still a slut screaming random things like "Vid 3x4xD to Hotel Room Service cuz Quatre needs someone singing 'Forget about yo boyfriend and meet me at the hotel...' to him." and "Do 6x9 to Lady Antebellum's Need You Now!" Grr...
Btw, I'm wingzerosnuggles on YouTube, in case you were wondering.
Figurative Brotherhood
by mistress amethyst une
The Hazards of Homecoming
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A Bro at a Party
"Remain calm, walk away slowly, and nobody will know you broke that."
-taken from Bro on the Go by Barney Stinson with Matt Kuhn, p. 116
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Zechs and Noin's stint on Mars was about to come to an end. Une's unwillingness to let two of her finest agents go had finally found justification in the dismal outcome of Preventer's most recent quarterly performance evaluations.
"Just get back here," snapped Une, her image fading in and out as static crackled and popped with her voice. Martian-Earth telecommunications had a long way to go. "You two are still under my jurisdiction. You still work for Preventer. The greenhorns have no idea what they're doing. They need a capable senior staff. I need you two back on this planet, damn it."
"What about Sally?" inquired Noin, running her fingers over the screen to wipe some stray red sand off. Sandiness wasn't just an uncomfortable hassle on the red planet, it was a way of life. "And didn't you get your hands on four of the five Gundam pilots?"
"I have Po and Chang constantly out on the field. Barton only works part-time, and I would rather not risk Yuy's rage for taking him off Vice Foreign Minister Darlian's security detail. As for Maxwell, he's more trouble than he's worth. Thankfully, Schbeiker keeps him in check."
"Schbeiker?"
"His girlfriend," she sighed, unable to keep from rolling her eyes. "I'm just thankful they share the same rank. I don't need the stress of implementing all that bureaucratic nonsense about fraternizing with superiors."
"Didn't stop you from taking the occasional tumble into His Excellency's bubble bath," thought Noin to herself. "Didn't stop me from letting Zechs see some 'swordplay.' Someone's gotten more uptight with age."
"Just please come back," continued Une, her tone pleading. "I'm willing to beg. I'm sacrificing dignity here. Name your price."
Noin raised an eyebrow. "Something tells me this isn't just about greenhorns and quarterly performance evaluations."
Une's static-ridden image bit its lip. For almost a full minute, she fidgeted, the sound of her fingers tapping against her desk mildly audible amidst the white noise.
Noin knew Une well enough to know that she only fidgeted when she was reluctant to reveal something of a personal nature. She decided to give her the push she needed. "If you can't tell me what's going on..."
"It's Mariemaia," she blurted, prompting a verbal geyser to come bursting forth. "The child needs me. She's fallen in love with the performing arts. Acting, singing, dancing. I'm raising a diva, but with Preventer in this state, I can't be the stage mother she needs. Her only living relative is Duchess Dermail, and I'll be damned if I let that woman hover over her. Did you know she had the gall to ask for my agents after a sexually related mishap involving Preventer-issue handcuffs? We are NOT the helpline for horny aristocrats and politicians. And speaking of horny, don't get me started on Yuy. Synchronizing his days off with the vice foreign minister's? If you're going to fuck, at least be discreet."
Noin's eyes widened at the obscenity before realization slapped a smirk on her face. Sexually frustrated single mom, thy name is Une. But what was all this about Heero and Relena? Wasn't their relationship strictly professional? When had it left platonic territory?
"That does sound like a lot to handle," observed Noin, trying not to get sidetracked by speculation.
"Thank you for noticing," growled Une, growing weary of playing the good sport now that the figurative beans had been spilled. "When can I expect you and Zechs back? And where is he anyway?"
"He's been in the shower for the last hour trying to wash the sandstorm out of his hair. Can you send a transport?"
"The Serpentarius is docking there in a week. I'll make arrangements. See you next month then?"
"Next month," she nodded, unable to keep from smiling as Une heaved a sigh of relief before the screen faded to black. If Heero and Relena were doing what Une thought they were doing, Zechs was in for a shock when they got back to Earth. Noin could only hope that conflict could be averted.
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Homecomings always came with festivities but Heero and Relena weren't feeling particularly festive about this one. Their breakfast table banter had gotten off to a bad start, and not even the cheerful way their food had been arranged could change their foul moods. Pagan, being the bearer of bad news upon taking Une's call, had helped the cook arrange the meal hoping some levity might soften the blow. He served them each two sunny side up eggs placed side by side with a strip of bacon positioned directly underneath to form a plate that smiled up at you. Upon hearing a bit of their conversation before making his way out, Pagan wondered if he should have curved those bacon strips downwards into sadness.
This couldn't be good.
"You haven't told him?"spat Heero in disbelief.
"What was I supposed to do?" challenged Relena. "Find a way to randomly slip it into conversation? 'Oh, and by the way, I've been dating this boy I met in school. You know...the one I had to keep you from killing by having my plane get in the middle of your battle. Just thought you should know. I hope this doesn't negatively impact your opinion of my taste in men.'"
"I was winning," he bit out bitterly, picking up his bacon strip then deciding against gnawing on it. He put it back down in a lopsided fashion. Now, the plate looked confused.
"Heero, I'm no mobile suit expert but even I could see that Milliardo was wiping the floor with you. If we don't break this to him properly, we're bound to have a repeat."
"Of what? Antarctica? If Zechs and I do fight, and I'm not saying we will since there's an off-chance he might approve of me, I'm not half-bad at hand to hand combat."
Relena snorted. "If you didn't notice from the last time you met him, my brother is a tall man."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
She fiddled with her fork, poking at one of her egg yolks. Her plate wept runny yellow. "Nothing. I'm just saying you might find yourself at a disadvantage. It would be in our best interest not to provoke him. We'll just sit him down and very calmly tell him that we're seeing each other. As you already said, he might approve of you."
Why couldn't she erase a hint of doubt from that statement? She had been with Heero for well over a year now. In that span of time, he had already moved in with her yet she still hadn't managed to work their situation into any of the monthly vidcom conversations with her brother. Probably because her first attempt had been so disastrous...
"Heero just got back from his deep space assignment, Milliardo. He's back on my security detail."
"Is that so?"
She nodded at the screen. Now, if she could only say 'and also, I'm dating him now.' Just spit it out, Relena.
"Is he still interested in you? I may have been observing via holographic ocular node, but I saw the way he looked at you on Libra."
"Oh?"
"I didn't like it."
"Oh..."
"It'll be two weeks before he and Noin get here," she added. "That gives us ample time to prepare. I think Sunday brunch would be ideal. It'll be just the four of us here."
"Hn," he grunted, casting no doubt on his pessimistic outlook.
The rest of breakfast was spent in silence. Heero made quick work of his eggs and bacon before rushing off, saying he had some paperwork to do. Relena dawdled, throughly disfiguring her meal before finally putting it out of its misery. What was she going to do? Quelling a potential war was a cakewalk compared to this. She knew in her heart that she really didn't care if her brother approved of Heero or not. Heck, sometimes even Heero didn't approve of himself. Still, it wouldn't hurt if two of the most important people in her life could get along...
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The trip home had been hellish. A full month aboard the Preventer research vessel Serpentarius was no picnic. Une fully expected Zechs and Noin to work in transit.
"Transport amenities don't pay for themselves," she told them. "Besides, the space division of our research and development team needs all the extra help it can get."
And so, Zechs and Noin found themselves spending most of their trip home apart. After toiling through sixteen hour shifts, they barely had the strength to kiss each other goodnight as they tumbled into their less than comfortable shared bed. The days blended into each other as the portholes showed only constant night. The only semblance of day they got was the twelve hour cycle of brightening and dimming on the ship's lighting fixtures. Well, they would be seeing real sun soon enough.
On Mars, direct sunlight had been filtered through the settlement's walls. They lived in a city encased in a dome. The settlement was like a snowglobe, shielded from the Martian elements with its own environmental controls. Sand was prone to seeping in though. Otherwise, it was very much like living in a Lagrange point colony cluster. However, that wasn't the point of terraforming. Regular expeditions were done in order to tame the wild landscape outside the dome, allowing for expansion and the construction of more settlements. Progress had been moving at a slow and steady pace when they had left. With any luck, Mars would be Earth's twin by AC300.
Having left on an optimistic note, Zechs and Noin found coping with life on the Serpentarius a minor annoyance. Noin spent most of her time in the hydroponics bay while Zechs, with his expertise in physics and mathematics, found himself mired in the astrometrics laboratory. Lake Victoria had taught them well. Every OZ soldier was also adept at the sciences, each having selected an expertise. It was only logical. Nobody went around piloting mobile suits forever.
Noin's had chosen hydroponics for its applications in non-terran agriculture. Farming with no soil was definitely an asset to colony living, and her knowledge had helped efforts to grow edible vegetation on Mars. She was having a far easier time at her job than Zechs. It had been years since he had worked as a stellar cartographer. Mapping projections of space was vital to any ship and, in the academy, he had selected his specialty hoping to one day captain an exploration vessel when peace had been achieved and retirement was feasible.
"We'll navigate the stars," whispered Zechs in her ear. "I'll map the sky out just for you."
He stood behind her, his arms encircling her waist, holding her against him as they looked out the window of her quarters. He really shouldn't have been there. A male student sneaking into a female student's room in the dead of night merited expulsion, sexual dalliance or not. Still, it was only in the dark that he would take off his mask, and she liked how moonlight and starlight framed the contours of his face while his hair shined silver.
"And my hydroponics?"
His faint laugh tickled her cheek. "We'll have to eat, won't we? I guess you'll be my breadwinner."
Long ago, they had been such dreamers.
Putting the final touches on her botanical documentation, Noin heaved a sigh of relief. Reminiscing about the academy always gave her a heavy dose of nostalgia. Still, there was no point in living in the past. The war had changed them. So had Mars. Now, it was time for another transformation. In a week's time, they would set foot on Earth and move on to the next stage in their lives.
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Relena was anxious, unable to keep from gripping Heero's hand in an uncharacteristic display of nerves as they sat on the couch. Letting her rest her head against his shoulder, he squeezed her hand reassuringly. Any second now, that doorbell would ring and they would welcome Zechs and Noin back to Earth with what they hoped would be an enjoyable brunch.
Just yesterday, Zechs and Noin had arrived at spaceport in Brussels and hopped aboard a charter flight to Preventer HQ. No doubt Une had met with them there to discuss the specifics of their new duties. After a month of working aboard a research vessel, the two must have been exhausted. Heero could sympathize. His deep space mission had involved serving some time as a mechanic aboard the Serpentarius, and it was easily one of the most draining jobs he had ever taken on.
Maybe Zechs's fatigue would be to their advantage? He couldn't very well throttle Heero for dating Relena if he was too tired.
Ding-dong!
And there it was, the opening bell. Pagan got the door as Heero and Relena both stood. Zechs and Noin stepped into the living room, haggard-looking but well-dressed in their uniforms. Heero mentally congratulated himself for having opted to wear his own uniform. There would be no awkwardness over being under-dressed.
"You're looking lovely, Miss Relena," declared Noin as the girl rushed forward to give the older woman a hug. "You should tell me where you got that dress. It suits you."
Noin wasn't lying. Relena's sleeveless yellow shift dress was modest without being prudish. If stores specifically manufactured clothing for brunches, that dress would certainly fit the bill.
"I got it at a flea market," smiled Relena. "And after all these years, you still insist on 'miss?'"
"Force of habit," she beamed, reluctantly releasing her and stepping aside so Zechs could hold his sister.
"It's nice to see you again," greeted Zechs, keeping his hug brief. Heero watched the proceedings like an ominous shadow, largely ignored. Well, what was he expecting? He would be a fool to think-
"Heero!" exclaimed Noin, taking noticing him. He was taken by surprise when she caught him in an embrace.
"I know about you and Miss Relena but Zechs doesn't," she hastily whispered in his ear. "I assume you two fully intend to tell him."
She let go of him rather quickly, making some largely nonsensical comment about how he'd grown a few inches before asking Relena how soon they could be ushered into the dining room for the meal.
Zechs nodded in agreement. "After six years of mostly freeze-dried rations, we could use some fresh food."
Relena led them to the dining area as Heero found himself contemplating Noin's words. So she knew...
Well, that certainly complicated matters.
Was she going to be an ally?
A foe?
Neutral?
He plopped down next to Relena as Zechs and Noin sat opposite them. As always, Pagan's skills at table setting were impeccable. The table's trappings included porcelain plates that boasted at least a century's heritage, polished silver cutlery and crystal goblets with rims that sang. The servants quietly made their entrance, ladling soup as the first course. Heero was starting to feel a hint of trepidation, his appetite leaving him. Today was definitely a big deal. The last time Relena had asked that the good china be used for a meal, he had met her mother.
"I don't see why you thought I would disapprove," clucked Mrs. Darlian as she buried her spoon in her flan. "You're not exactly a charmer, Mr. Yuy, but my daughter sees you as someone worthwhile. The way she smiles when she's with you is more than enough to justify me liking you."
Heero and Relena sat stupefied, both their desserts untouched even as the sweets seemingly wobbled from the sheer will of their unvoiced elation.
"Though I might like you considerably less if you don't start eating," she smirked. "I didn't hijack Relena's kitchen to have my efforts ignored."
Heero considered it almost miraculous how that flan didn't come out his nose from the sheer speed at which he gulped it down. Hiccuping all the way through his goodbyes at the end of the night, he now had some inkling about where Relena got her ability to reduce him to a blithering idiot.
"So where are you two staying?"
Relena's question snapped Heero out of his reminiscence. That was certainly a question he wanted an answer to. Would they be moving into Relena's home? That would certainly complicate matters.
"A very nice apartment Preventer rented on our behalf," replied Zechs. "We don't have to pay a single credit. It's part of our salary package."
Heero resisted the urge to sigh in relief. Dodged a bullet there.
"Sounds like a good deal," beamed Relena. "Will you be working near HQ?"
"Yes, we're essentially going to assist Une in running Preventer."
Relena looked impressed but Heero found himself unable to suppress a facial twitch. Zechs would be his new boss?
"Not as impressive as it sounds," interjected Noin as she threw Heero a reassuring smile. "It's mostly dealing with bureaucratic bull. All the boring stuff. Desk jobs."
"Well, it definitely doesn't sound impressive if you put it like that," said Zechs, giving her a look of mock disappointment. She elbowed him as Heero averted his eyes and looked down at his plate.
It was with surprise that Heero faced his entr?e. When exactly had they taken the soup away? In its place, Heero now found himself staring at a rather formidable steak. He would have to start eating. It wouldn't be long before someone took notice of the fact that he hadn't said a single word since they sat down. At the very least, having a mouthful of meat afforded him a valid excuse not to make conversation.
"Someone's being a bit too quiet," commented Noin. "Heero, mind telling us how things are with you?"
Too late.
"There's really not much to say..."
Clich?, much?
"I'm sure there is," countered Noin. "Anything interesting happen recently? Like in the past year, perhaps?"
"Don't interrogate the boy," chortled Zechs.
"I'm just wondering," she grinned. "I mean a lot's changed since we went to Mars. It would be nice to get some updates."
Relena cleared her throat. Heero turned to her, transfixed. He supposed she was going to drop the bomb now. While the situation wasn't ideal, factors in their favor were in play. Noin had given them an opening with her segue to the topic of the past year. Also, Zechs was no doubt still tired from travel. Besides, the red wine paired with the meal must have mellowed him out to some degree if his defense of Heero against Noin's verbal onslaught was any indication.
It was now or never.
"Well, as you both already know, Heero came back from a deep space mission over a year ago," began Relena, pausing to gulp down a mouthful of wine before continuing. "He's been on my security detail since then."
"You told me as much," acknowledged Zechs.
Relena bit her lip, her forehead visibly crinkling as she struggled to spit the next sentence out. "I may have left some things out."
Her brother raised an eyebrow. From the look on his face, he didn't like where this was going.
"I was going to tell you as soon as it began. I swear I was..."
Zechs had started to shake his head in perfect synchronization with Heero's. Preemptive apologies were never a good move.
"But that's beside the point. I think you should know, and I hope you approve. I've been going out with Heero for over a year now."
Zechs emptied his wine glass in one swift motion, unable to let go of the stem even as he set it back down on the table. He opened his mouth to speak but quickly closed it again. At least, his head had stopped shaking.
"And also, he moved in with me a few months back."
The long tense silence was swiftly punctuated by the glass shattering in Zechs's grasp. Unavoidably, shards of it embedded themselves into his skin. He didn't seem to notice.
"Milliardo, you're bleeding!" gasped Relena, nearly knocking over her chair as she rushed to his side.
He looked at his hand, entranced. "Yes, apparently so," he stated all too calmly, staring at it blankly. Noin hastily took the napkin from her lap and bound his hand to stop the blood flow. "I guess we'll have to cut brunch short for a quick trip to the emergency room," he decided.
"But Milliardo-"
"We'll discuss this another time," he said, getting up from his chair. Noin shrugged, following suit. She didn't seem the least bit disturbed by the events. If the small smile playing upon her lips was any indication, she was amused. She mouthed something to Heero as Zechs turned to leave. Relena could only slump back down into her seat, disappointment overtaking her as she watched the pair's retreating backs walk out the door. Meanwhile, Heero couldn't keep a smirk from creeping onto his face.
"What are you so happy about?" Relena bit out, turning to glare at him.
"I read Noin's lips. Zechs likes me."
"Likes you?" she spat, eyes widening in disbelief. "He mutilated himself in shock."
"But he didn't mutilate me," he pointed out. "That's a good sign."
Relena rolled her eyes. "Men..."
On the floor, the broken glass remained largely forgotten. An irked Pagan would sweep up the wreckage much later, wondering if either Peacecraft sibling cared about that goblet having belonged to a set that had been in his care longer than either of them had been alive.
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I have an unhealthy obsession with bacon and flan. Bacon flan?
Also, poor Pagan. And sorry, Lillie! I know you wanted Noin to kick Zechs's ass but I just couldn't do it. 