I don’t own Gundam Wing. I don’t own Trowa either (or so he keeps
telling me) which is why I had to lock him in the cupboard. *evil grin* - ummmm…. let’s move on shall
we…
Quatre looked tired.
Leaning back in my seat, ankles crossed in front of me, I watched him
secure his bowtie with the ease brought about by repetition. He smoothed his waistcoat and plucked at his
shirtsleeves, assessing his appearance in the mirror before turning his
attention back to me. He let out a
loud, heartfelt sigh, before slumping on to the end of his bed.
“I don’t want to go.”
“You don’t have to go.”
Quatre groaned in response.
“Yes I do. Dammit.”
“No you don’t. Although,
you should keep in mind that it is New Years Eve, and if you don’t go, how am I
supposed to pick up one of the gorgeous girls you’ve carelessly tossed aside?” I argued, a smirk foiling my attempt at a
deadpan expression. Quatre grinned.
“ Plus,” I added, “The press would be severely disappointed if
they had to see in the New Year without linking you to some new fling.”
“True, true,” Quatre agreed, “I have an obligation to my public”
The blond man grimaced.
“Mind you…oh to have the sex life they say I do.”
I laughed, reaching over to take an apple from the nearby fruit
bowl.
“Quatre, old friend, there is no way you could have THAT much
stamina.”
Taking the flick knife out of my back pocket, I began to
meticulously remove the apple’s peel.
While I had little use for the knife anymore, I had continued to carry
it around out of habit. Besides, it had
been a gift from Cathy and it came in handy for peeling apples. I liked peeling apples.
“Relena’s bringing her new boyfriend.” Quatre mentioned
casually.
I jumped as the knife slipped off the apple and sank into my
finger. Cursing softly, I thrust the
injured digit into my mouth and shot a startled look at him. He returned an apologetic grimace, and
passed me a tissue. Wrapping the cloth
around the cut, I ventured,
“I wasn’t aware Relena was involved with someone?”
It was true, since our rather “interesting” visit before
Christmas I had not seen her again. As
expected, the problems involving the Minister of Foreign Affairs had become
complicated and messy. He had indeed
stepped down from his position, but not without some “gentle persuasion” and
Relena was due to begin her new role in the beginning weeks of the New Year.
“Justin Freeland.” Quatre confirmed. “He’s the personal
assistant to the President. ‘A fine,
upstanding young man of solid family background and masculine good
looks.’”
I raised my eyebrows in surprise.
“So I take it that means that the media approve?”
My question was rewarded with a slight shrug of the shoulders
and a nod of affirmation. Who
knew? I was unsure why this news was
such a surprise to me. Perhaps I had
become so settled in the assumption of Relena’s devotion to Heero, that her
decision to move on was so unexpected.
Quatre shot a glance at his watch, before rising to his feet and
shrugging into his dress jacket.
Walking towards the door, he whispered,
“Doesn’t Heero have any idea how immense a mistake he’s making?”
******
The festivity was well under way by the time the Minister for
Foreign affairs made her appearance, and she made an entry worthy of the
Princess that she was. Heads literally
turned and my first glimpse of her literally caused my throat to close and the
bottom to drop from my stomach.
She was wearing a
crimson gown, soft and flowing, which delicately traced the lines of her
figure. Her hair was braided into a
tasteful design, revealing her long elegant neck. Around her neck was a simple, yet beautiful ruby pendant.
I narrowed my eyes and glared at the accessory Relena had
brought with her. Tall, well built and
attractive (if you like that kind of thing), Justin Freeland stood too close
and held her arm with far too much possession for my taste. I made a swift decision to dislike this guy.
I watched her and her trained primate as they made their way
across the room. Settling myself
against the wall, I saw her move from one guest to another. I marvelled at the way people responded to
her, and the way she spoke to each person with such kindness and
sincerity. I observed her as her path
finally crossed with Quatre’s, and smiled at the way Relena’s expression lit up
as she embraced our friend. They spoke
for a while and then Quatre indicated in my direction with a motion of his
head. Relena turned towards me and gave
a small wave. Catching Quatre’s hand in
hers, they made their way across to me, Justin trailing along behind.
“Trowa!” Relena exclaimed, “How are you? I was wondering if you would come
tonight. I felt so bad that I hadn’t
seen you again since your last visit.
How are things? Is the circus going well? How is Cathy?” Taking my hand, she noticed the bandage on my
finger, and gave me an inquiring look.
I gave her a lop sided grin.
“I cut myself. Don’t
tell Cathy, I would never live it down.”
“Your secret is safe with me.”
Justin shifted a little closer and cleared his throat. Relena started a little before exclaiming,
“Oh my goodness, where are my manners. Trowa let me introduce you to Justin. Justin, Trowa is an old friend of mine…he performs with the
Circus troupe that has been in the area.
He does the most exciting act with the lions….”
Her voice petered off as she noticed her partners’ stiff,
unfriendly posture. He was observing me
with a definite air of suspicion, and I stared back without expression.
“The Circus? Really!”
Justin said, his tone smooth and condescending. Relena frowned slightly, before shooting me a slightly apologetic
look. The other man placed his hand on
Relena’s arm, steering her towards the dance floor in the middle of the room.
“Come on darling, I do believe you promised me the first dance.”
With that, he drew her away, giving her no opportunity to
argue. Quatre watched their departure,
before fixing me with a measured look.
“What the hell was that about?”
He exclaimed.
“What a schmuck,” I muttered with conviction.
“What the hell is she thinking getting involved with such a
prat. Is she punishing herself? Trying to torture Heero? What?”
Quatre offered no comment but simply continued to watch me
through slightly narrowed lids. I
grumpily crossed my arms across my chest, and resumed my position of leaning
against the wall. Through the crowd, I
could catch glimpses of dark blonde hair, and the occasional flash of crimson
silk. At one instance the floor cleared
enough to see them clearly. She was
wrapped in his arms, dancing close, one of his hands pressed officiously
against the exposed plane of her back.
He smiled down at her, before placing a soft kiss on her bare
shoulder. One song followed another,
and then another. Finally, I could hold
out no longer. Pushing myself away from
the wall, I began to stride towards the dance floor.
“Trowa…” Quatre’s voice turned my head.
“Take care. For gods
sake don’t cause a scene.” I simply
raised an eyebrow, nodded briskly and continued on my way.
********
Standing behind Justin, I gave him a light tap on the
shoulder. He turned his attention on me
with a scowl.
“Mind if I cut in,” I said, in what was more of statement than a
question.
“As a matter of fact,” he began, interrupted by Relena as she
stepped around him.
“Oh course not, Justin wouldn’t mind sacrificing a dance for an
old friend.”
Justin paused for a moment, as he did what I thought was a very
good goldfish impersonation. Recovering
himself, he nodded stiffly, kissed Relena’s cheek and made his way back across
the room. Turning to me, Relena offered
me her hand and we began to shift to the music in a relaxed and companionable
silence. As we danced, I could not help
but notice the soft curve of her collarbone, and the delicate way the end of
her nose turned up. Or how small and
graceful her fingers were, curled in mine.
Or how deep her eyes were. How
could Heero not want to be lost in the depths of those eyes? He was a fool.
The song finished and moved onto another, a soft bittersweet
ballad. We continued to sway to the
music, when I felt Relena stiffen against me.
Looking at her closely, I noticed that she had dropped her chin and
seemed to tremble. Glancing up at me
she whispered,
“Listen to the words Trowa,”
I shook my head slightly, failing to understand her
meaning. Her eyes were imploring. I turned my attention to the song that was
playing. It was at least half way
through, so perhaps I had missed its’ significance. But then I heard them.
…. Or just
stay with me a while
Before I fall
asleep
Take these
tears
Wash your skin
I’m having
trouble breathing
Since you
walked in
My head is
reeling
My eyes have
cried
A million
tears
From wishing
you were here
Relena seemed to let out a small sob, and looking down, I saw
the solitary tear escape to skim down her cheek. Tightening my hold on her hand, I turned towards the large
arched doorways that lead outside.
Finding a small, secluded alcove, I helped Relena take a
seat. Offering her the handkerchief
from my coat pocket, I waiting in silence as she dabbed at her cheek.
“Why can’t I move on Trowa?
He doesn’t want me anymore, so why can’t I just save some small shred of
dignity and get on with my life?”
I looked at her, and was dismayed at the way her shoulders were
hunched and her head drooped in dejection.
For the millionth time in the last five years, I cursed Heero Yuy.
“Did he make you any promises?” I kicked myself the moment the
tactless words had stumbled from my lips.
“Yes…No…I don’t know….” She tripped over the words, voice
forlorn and confused. Her hands rested
in her lap, and she twisted the handkerchief in a tight coil with her
fingers. Her agitation seemed to
increase and I realised that she wanted to impart some piece of information,
information I suspected she had not yet told anyone.
I crouched down on the floor at her feet, resting my folded arms
on my knees and waited. Relena took
several deep breaths and seemed to strengthen her resolve. A deep blush had started to spread across
her cheeks, and I began to have my suspicions about exactly what she was about
to tell me.
“Before he…. disappeared…. he told me he loved me. But now I don’t know if he meant it.”
I opened my mouth to say something, but she held up her hand to
stop me.
“The last time I saw Heero, he…. spent the night.” A small smile
flashed over her lips at this admission.
“Afterwards, I remember waking up, in the early hours, and he
was sitting beside me, stroking my hair.
That was when he told me he loved me.
But his face was so sad, so despondent.
I knew he was saying goodbye, and there was nothing I could do or say to
stop him. And then he was gone. What did I do wrong?”
“Nothing, Relena, nothing.
Maybe Heero had other things he wanted to sort out first. Or maybe he
was afraid. He never expected to
survive the war. I understand how he
may have felt; I never expected to live either. And you gave him that will to live. But that doesn’t automatically mean that he’s going to be able to
adjust to this new life. To accept that
there is a place for him in your world.”
I paused for a moment, debating whether I should broach the
subject of Justin.
“How serious is this thing with Justin?”
Relena sighed.
“Serious enough, I guess.
I can’t wait around for a shadow anymore, Trowa, I deserve better than
that. If Heero wants to take an active
role again in my life, he had better do something about it soon, because I’m
not waiting anymore. I used to believe
in true love, and in having a soul mate.
I thought Heero was the one. I’m
being to think I was wrong. Maybe I’m
simply destined to find someone who I’m comfortable with, a life
companion. Maybe true love only belongs
in fairy tales.”
Relena stood up again, straightening her dress and handing the
crumpled piece of cotton back to me.
“I had my one night of passion, one taste of perfect love. Maybe that’s all I’m destined to have.”
She watched as I climbed to my feet, before placing a soft kiss
on my cheek.
“Happy New Year, Trowa Barton.”
And as I stood alone in the quiet alcove and watched her
departing back, I made my New Years Resolution.
Next time I saw Heero Yuy I was going to kick his arse.
******
**The song words come from
“A Million Tears” by Kasey Chambers from her “Barricades and Brickwalls”
Album. If you can find it, have a
listen to it … its just gorgeous and just screamed Heero and Relena to me. **