1. The Elevator
"Well." Duo twiddled his thumbs.
"Yes well." Wufei stared murderously at the elevator's control panel. "You just had to push the friggin' STOP button, didn't you, Duo?!?!?!"
"It was an accident!"
"Not when you press it repeatedly!!!!" Duo looked at the ground and began tracing a floor tile with the toe of his shoe.
"Please don't yell at me." He sniffled. "It hurts my feelings." A lone tear crept out from Duo's left eye. Wufei's smacked himself on the head with his hand. Wordlessly, he turned and started banging his head against the elevator wall.
"Now, now Wufei, no need for that. Your brain is already quite f*cked up as it is. And Duo, dry those tears. Crying only makes you look more unattractive." Both heads shot up, startled, ad turned slowly to face Quatre. The sweet blonde boy was smiling evilly from his corner of the elevator.
"Uh...Quatre....are you all right?" Duo asked hesitantly.
"I feel fine, perfectly fine," Quatre replied happily, his right eye ticking oddly Wufei and Duo paled and drew closer to each other. "I'm simply a tad bit...unhappy with our present circumstance, that's all." Quatre faked a frown and wiped a nonexistent tear from his eye. He then began sobbing dramatically, shaking his body violently. "Hoo boo...booo hoo....<sob> <whimper>....<snicker>....HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" Suddenly whipping a knife out of his pocket, Quatre began throwing it at the overhead lights repeatedly. Soon the elevator was pluged into darkness. A small whimper could be heard from Wufei's corner of the elevator. A lighter suddenly flared in the darkness and its small flame spookily illuminated Quatre's face. his expression was far from calming.
"Welcome to my world, boys and girls," he cackled. "Prepare...to suffer!!!" He started waving the lighter madly, alternately illuminating and darkening his face. Duo hugged Wufei tightly.
"Hold me," he whimpered. And surprisingly, Wufei did.
-MEANWHILE-
"Uh oh," Trowa said loudly. Heero looked up from his laptop.
"What's wrong?"
"Quatre forgot to take his medication today." Heero's mouth dropped and his eyes widened in fear. "....It couldn't be that bad, right? I mean....he wouldn't do that much damage...."
Trowa stared at him worldlessly.
Both knocked over their chairs in their scramble to reach the door.
2. My One and Only Love
Trowa stared fervently at the object of his affection. "I Love you madly," he passionately declared, his eyes alight with an inner fire. He reached up and traced his love's face. "Those kinda eyes...that gorgeous mouth...that luscious and vibrant hair!" Trowa threw his arms out and whirled madly in circles.
"Together!" he yelled. "Together!!!" He fell to the floor, breathless. He closed his eyes and rubbed his head against the rug. "We'll be so happy," he murmured softly, running his hands through his beloved's hair. "So happy." A sharp knock on the door interrupted his reverie.
"Trowa! What are you doing?!" Duo yelled from the other side of the door. He began pounding on it. "You've been in there for, like, 30 minutes and I have to use the toilet!!!"
Trowa sprang up, looking at his love anxiously. "They come to take me away," he said fretfully, his heart breaking over the crestfallen look on his snookum's face. Leaning over, he passionately kissed his love muffin on the lips. "I'll be back, darling. Wait for me."
"Trowa!!!" Duo screamed from the other side of the door. Trowa gave one last heartfelt look at his puddin' pie before turning around and opening the door. He gave Duo a hateful look.
"Uh...Trowa...why are you wearing lipstick?" he asked hesitantly.
"Home wrecker!" Trowa spat back at him before pushing him aside and storming down the hall. Duo walked into the bathroom and stared at the lipstick marks on the mirror.
"I don't want to know," he sighed. He turned around and closed the door.
3. Tainted Love
Duo: Relena
Relena: Yes?
D: <rushes up to her, embraces her passionately, and dips her. Whispers huskily.> I love you.
R: WHAT?! LET GO OF ME!!!
D: <begins planting small butterfly kisses all over her face>. "I adore your eyes." <kisses her eyes> "And your pert nose enraptures my soul!" <sucks on Relena's nose. Relena looks like she's about to cry> "I love the way the sunlight glistens off your lustrous hair." <licks Relena's hair. Her face slowly turns green.> "But most of all...I love your sweet luscious lips." <Duo gives Relena a heartfelt kiss.>
R: <suddenly coming to senses. Smacks Duo hard across the back of his head. Frees herself and punches him in the stomach. Looks down at him.> "Freak." <walks out of the room and goes searching for Heero.>
D: <rocking from side to side on the floor.> "She doesn't love me...she doesn't love me." <whispers to himself for a few minutes. Suddenly jumps up off the floor.> "I'll make her love me!" <starts laughing maniacally. Runs to Relena's desk and grabs a big red Magic Marker. Starts running toward her room.>
R: <hears a knock on the door and answers it.> "Yes-?"
D: <tackles her to floor. Promptly writes his name in big letters on her forehead.> "Now you are branded! You will be mine forever! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!"
R: "Help!"
Quatre: <hears Relena's repeated cries and runs into her room. Smiles maniacally and carefully closes the door.> "You will all suffer!!!"
-MEANWHILE-
"Uh-oh." Hilde starts hyperventilating.
"What?" Dorothy asks.
"Duo and Quatre didn't take their medication..." Both stare at each other, wide eyed.
"Well," Dorothy starts hopefully, "maybe it won't be-"
She's cut off by a loud scream coming from the direction of Relena's room. Hilde pales and runs out the door towards the source of the sound. Dorothy merely smiles evilly and goes back to reading the newspaper.